Sometimes there are guys out there that are honest about what they want & I respect & thank them for that because then I can make the decision about what you want to do, rather than them stringing me along. When this guy said he just wanted casual hook ups, I explained I’d just got out of something like that & wasn’t interested in getting back into that because I feel like I barely made it out of that one alive, with my dignity intact.

Anyway he keeps chatting to me after the first chat which I’ll give him points for that – I always struggle to be the first to message. So one night I was planning a date with a guy but he bailed (Story to come), Bowie starts chatting to me online & says that he thinks it’s bullshit why the other guy cancelled. I don’t know if it’s to make me feel shit so I’ll sleep with him or what but I had told my friend that I would go to a gig with her because I had nothing else to do plus she had a spare ticket & while chatting to this guy he says that he might come too. I don’t think too much of it, many guys say that sort of stuff all the time. I so tell my friend how this guy was perhaps going to come to tonight, but we just enjoy ourselves.

Two bottles of wine down, we’re having a great night, my friend goes to the toilet & I stay in the main room, she comes back & says that there’s a band in the other area & this gig was depressing her so we walk into the other room. A guy & her point at each other & start laughing, I have no idea what is going on but then I realise it’s Bowie! He realises who I am & he tells me that my friend had lent him $1 when he was at the smoke machine that wouldn’t take his $20 note. What are the odds?

We talk for a while, I have no idea what about but when his friend rocks up we end up hanging out together & all go back into the he main room (we snuck them in as they didn’t have tickets!) We kiss on the dance floor, I mean he’s there so I may as well. Might not be a lasting relationship but at least it’ll get Milky out of my head!

At the end of the night, I don’t really remember a lot, three bottles of wine & I am quite drunk, we’re sitting outside & he gives me his jacket to wear, even though I have a little jumper to put on, but somehow (I don’t know the conversation) but he gets in the car with us & comes back to my place for the night. I don’t really remember a lot which is probably not good, but we had crazy wild drunk sex & fell asleep, with the covers everywhere.

He wakes up early, I think I’m still drunk but I did say I’d drop him home, he says to drop him at a train station but I just can’t do that, I’ve had similar happen to me (remember Travel Agent?!) & it sucks, but then I remember his house is about an hour or more from mine. We talk easily on the way to his house, it’s not awkward which is nice, he kisses me quickly goodbye when he gets out the car & I haven’t heard from him since, yet he hasn’t deleted me from the app. But we were clear about what it was so that’s the good thing. I don’t have to wonder the stupid range of questions that seem to plague me after I meet someone new:

“Does he like me?”

“Will he call me?”

“Will I see/hear from him again?”

“Am I good in bed?”


The next week he messages me for a bit & I tell him that I don’t remember much, he tries to tell me that we didn’t do anything, which I know is a lie, so he tells me the truth what he remembers & what he liked. He asks me what I liked & what I would get him to do to me if I was there. He tells me that makes him hard. We talk a little more that day but a few days later when I log on to the site, I see that he’s deleted me. I mean, what the fuck DUDE! I know we weren’t looking for the same thing but my god, what is wrong with these people?




Reactivating my account, I get more likes than I ever have before, I chat to an electrician guy who asks if I’m free to catch up. He looks alright on his profile & we’ve chatted a fair bit so I think why not, what could it hurt. If worse comes to worse, then it’s just a good story for my blog!

He suggests the worst local pub near my house to catch up & I immediately say no & suggest one that has just been done up, so we decide to meet there. I walk in & don’t see him straight away so I go to the bar to get a wine so I turn around he’s at the other end of the bar so I walk up to him & say hello. He’s pretty much like his pictures but in real life he reminds me so much of Cruise & I am kinda not really attracted to him.

The drink goes well, I talk a lot which is what I do when they are quiet & I make him laugh a lot but he doesn’t really make me laugh at all. It’s easy for me when I don’t find them that attractive to be the person I am, not the shy person that guys I like see which is probably why the men I don’t like get to see the real me & actually want to see me again.

We have a couple of drinks but it’s so windy & cold that we decide to go, he walks me halfway to my car & asks if I want to catch up again, which I say yes, then he says he’ll hug me goodbye & I kinda do an awkward kiss on the cheek at the same time, not really thinking & so we kinda leave awkwardly as I didn’t actually kiss his cheek. SUPER!

I get home & minutes later there is a message on the app from him saying hey cutie, thanks for tonight, here is my number, hope we can catch up again. Why when things go ok with a guy, do I start thinking about Milky? We weren’t ever a coupe for fuck sake, he didn’t like me, he was short & lied about his age, why would I want to be with that? But I also thought about the Seacliff guy, I was actually really interested in him.


So I don’t want to lead on this guy by messaging him but I also don’t want to give up on something that could be good just because I like someone else who doesn’t like me at all. But I message him & a few weeks later after about 10 texts in total we arrange another date, coffee on a Saturday afternoon & possibly a walk.

We catch up for a coffee, he arrives & buys the coffees – Well hot choc for me as I don’t like coffee, we chat for a bit, it’s a little awkward & hasn’t gotten any better to be honest, there are a few silences which make me uncomfortable, when he finally says that the sun is in his eyes, we get up less than an hour later to go. We have an awkward goodbye & he says we should catch up again, I say the usual yeah, but don’t really mean it. I think he gets it too because I haven’t heard from him.


Guest Blogger: The Animal #2

Well I don’t know about you… But I’ve been waiting The Animal to call!

I wonder what will happen, this woman (or animal) is a little out there! Even by my standards!

The Animal #2

So we left this at The Animal going to call me, after her antics, wasn’t quite sure I wanted the call!
Yet, I did like this girl… Fit, intelligent, reasonably good sense of humor… maybe it could work? Even with the “Outdoor” escapade desires!

Anyway, so two days later I get a call…
The usual ‘Hi how are you?’ etc… Then the apology for going off her nut.

Apology accepted.

Would you like to come over, I’ll cook dinner and we’ll have a wine or two?

Yeah, why not!
In to the city, meet at apartment foyer, kisses, cuddles, all the nice stuff.
Up we go. Extremely nice dinner with Salmon and healthy stuff we are both in too.
White wine to start, followed by a lovely Pinot from the Adelaide Hills… Going well. No signs of the crazy side coming!
Discussion had of the antics, plus the loss of plot!! All good, stress from work and ex can do that to you (Right? We have all been there!!)

So after a wine or 3, the glass keeps getting filled… At this point very aware I can’t drink too much more, have to drive.
“No, you can stay here” she says…

Ok, well I guess we have done the deed already, so what is that going to hurt?

More wine…
Turns to romance…
Then fun in the kitchen…. (Kitchen is fun by the way… Just saying… Sturdy bench???? You get the picture…)

“Let’s move to the bedroom “

Not going to say no at this point, as there are things that have to be dealt with…
Didn’t think about the last time with a tree branch… Surely this will be normal…

So to keep condensed and not go into all the gory details, just before we end up completely naked, she asks
“Have you ever been tied up, and had sex with a Tiger?”
Being a lad from way out of the city, sheepishly reply “Nope”
Then notice the dog like collars on bed head….
“Would you like to?”

There’s alarm bells going on here already, yet the little head was talking not the big head… Mmmmm…. Fuck it, only live once hey….

So strapped in….
Rather different not being control…

This is the part where the nickname comes…. May not seem nuts for others, yet my naive country upbringing comes out here…

She starts to growl, then scratch and claw at my chest…. And very close to drawing blood…
And the mind is going ”WTF!!!!!!!”
At this point… Yep, have to say I’m not enjoying this and the more I bucked, the more she seemed to be getting off…


Then thought, Na… I’m done with this… I have to say so….
But before I could she says
“You’ve gone limp”

Yep… It happened….

“Yeah well, not sure having sex with a Tiger was on my agenda this evening”

Boom! Released the “Animal”

Still tied up, out came a horse whip…
Laying completely starkers, I’m thinking ‘Holy shit!!’
“What the hell are you going to do with that?”

“I’m going to punish you and “him” for spoiling my fun”

Now this is when I lost it and pretty sure most of the CBD heard me…
I went off my tree ”Get me the fuck out of this shit!”
“Really?” Was her reply
“Fuck yes… NOW!”

With that, and a very forlornly face, she undid the collars….
Out of bed like a jackrabbit, with the “Animal “ quickly behind trying to apologise for being so forward…
Clothes gathered, put on, completely ignoring every single word…
Dressed and bolted…
No parting words from me except this… ”Animal, please, next guy you want to do this with, take it easy on him”

Never heard from her again…

Did run into her going up Lofty once, with the new guy. Ignored each other. One good thing though, as I was coming down and she was on way up… Fuck did I run faster!!!

And with that Ladies and Gents, that’s when I ceased to use anything online for dating…
And also pretty much lost interest in any sort of meet and greets…
Sit back these days and smile a little about this, as in “Holy shit I find myself in some pickles”
Not willing to do find myself in those situations again. However, still believe the fairytale exists… Think everybody should…
Moral of the story…. Enjoy your time being single, yet if you don’t like it, never accept anything that is less than your standards…
If it doesn’t fit with who you are, say so. Be honest. Honesty is better than silence.

I am really lost for words with this one! But thanks to my reader for being brave & sharing with not only me, but with all of you!



Have I not learnt from reactivating my closed accounts on stupid online dating sties? Well clearly not because I reactivate an account & meet someone that I think is really cute, we chat & we end up chatting for ages. We talk about quite a lot, never getting dirty, which at this point in my dating life is refreshing. He tells me straight away that he had kids, that he has for a week on & week off, tomorrow night would be his last kid free night for the week.

We talk some more, even though I am dying to go to sleep & he says that he can tell I’m not crazy & even though it’s really soon, he wants to meet me tomorrow night for a drink. I agree that it’s fast but I end up saying yes because it’s better to meet them quickly than to have it go on for weeks & then get semi attached & them meet & find out they are a tool.

So we arrange to meet the next night for a drink at a bar. Why are these the days that I get stuck in the office doing really important work until 6:00 pm, when I said I would be there at 7:00 pm, I look like crap so have to go home & change, fix my make up & get back to the pub! But somehow I made it but was a few minutes late. He did message me a few minutes to 7:00 pm & said he was at the bar, I messaged back & said I was just a few minutes away.

The conversation flows pretty easily about all sorts of topics, dating stories (I share some of mine – we’d be there all day if I shared everything!) & he tells me a lot about his exes & kids, which kinda sets my mind at ease. (As the only reason I don’t like to date men with kids is because I don’t want to have to deal with the crazy exs.) We have a couple of drinks & the place clears out so we decide to leave.

I really hate this part, after a date like this, where is wasn’t amazing (like everyone else’s dates I hear about. ‘Oh we talked for hours & we have been inseparable since’ –Oh give me a break!) Anyway the date went well, nothing over the top but you can’t really work out if he likes you, you think he looks nice & has been quite funny, yet who knows what he thinks. So you walk out the car park, I point to my car, knowing that last drink I went out for where the guy (Wine-o) just said bye & walked off, so I was getting a similar vibe from this guy, so I say it was nice to meet you, while getting my keys out my purse & he launches at me kissing me, I start kissing him back instantly. Oh how nice it is to be kissed, I haven’t been kissed since Milky, even though I’ve been on a dates, so I just lean into it, really enjoying that type of kiss where you know isn’t going to lead directly to sex.

We kiss in the car park for about 5 minutes before he pushes me up against my car, we start running our hands over each other when he says “Am I the only one that’s thinking it?” I ask what? He says “that I want to start ripping clothes off” I giggle saying not here, then kiss him but add, “yeah I’m thinking it too.” He laughs & says that “you could of led with that” but I say I thought it was pretty obvious. We continue kissing before a couple of cars come into the carpark so he says we should stop but will talk to me soon, we say good bye & go our separate ways.

I don’t hear from him for a couple of days, I assume because he’s got his kids. I know he’s got Friday off so my friend says I should message him first, maybe he doesn’t think I’m interested because of the ripping off clothes incident that will forever be burnt in my memory of the wrong thing to say… So I message him hoping he has a good day off & fun with the kids, thanks for meeting me the other night I had fun, I get a response a full work day later saying he had fun with the kids & that he’s getting sick, I say I hope he feels better soon & that’s been it. I know he’s got the kids till next week so I just leave the ball I his court!


He deletes me from the app a few weeks later. No love lost but it’s always baffling to think that he wanted to rip my clothes off one night, yet he deletes me a few weeks later, after barely talking to me. I’m sure that’s not about me. Of course people will say that he was dating multiple people, which is fine, I get that, I’m not that naive, I am dating a few people too but I can’t believe that EVERY single guy is choosing someone else over me EVERY time, especially when he says when we’re chatting that he’s never gotten along with someone so well!


We’ve Fucked Before

Having deleted my accounts several times, I forget who I’ve chatted to in the past. Nicknames look familiar but you never know if they’ve deleted their accounts & changed their nicknames as often as I do. So there comes a time in little ol Adelaide when you start chatting to someone that you start to feel a little connection with, think might be really cool then they start to talk dirty to you. I reply saying that I don’t want to fuck random guys anymore, I’m looking for more. Expecting to be ignored & him stop talking to me, so I’m surprised when the little icon comes up to say that he’s typing. I wait to see what line this dude has, like I haven’t heard every line in the book yet… But I was not expecting him to say ‘We’ve fucked before!’

FUCKING HELL, how slutty can I be not to remember someone I’ve slept with? I start to go through my mental list of men I’ve slept with & cannot remember this guy, I ask him when & he says last year. That doesn’t help, that was about the time I was just about screwing a different guy each week. I ask why we never saw each other again. He says that I went away for work & he got busy, which is fair enough, I do travel a bit for work but I think why wouldn’t he message me when he wasn’t busy. I also ask him what his name is again & he gives me a different name to when we first started chatting. Who the fuck is this?!

So he asks if we can catch up that Friday night, he wants to have a shower with me so I figure, it’s not going to be another notch on my bedpost that maybe I could meet up with this guy. Clearly our first meeting wasn’t significant that I didn’t have a story about him or even remember it so it couldn’t have been that bad, right? I give him my number, which I NEVER do, I always ask for theirs, I thought this might help the previous text messages in my phone from him & piece together the evening we caught up. He never texts me but later than night on the dating app, he starts talking to me, I’m like what are you doing dude. He asks to come over after the gym in the morning when I have my shower, I say sure, text me. He doesn’t so I don’t bother with him anymore. I end up going away for work again & he chats to me so many times on the app but never texts me.

Somehow, we exchange details to get off the dating app and onto a different chat app, where he sends me dick pics (Yaye – Not.) & I question him more about when we caught up. He doesn’t seem to have a lot of info so I go though my phone & find text messages that I think might be his, then it all comes together… Oh god!

2018-08-22 21.02.48-2

The night I slept with him, I went out on a winery tour all day with my friend, I was drunk & trying to get Hockey Puck to come over again, but of course he was playing his ‘I’m sick’ game. So I cracked the shits with him & told him to fuck me or fuck off. I got online & as I’d been talking to this guy, we text & he came over as I was getting dropped off. I still don’t really remember the sex with him but he does tell me that we talked a little, kissed then I sucked his cock, we had sex but then he was embarrassed because he came so quickly, so he didn’t want to see me again. I say that there are so many more reactions that he could have had besides getting up & leaving. He doesn’t ask me what I mean, but for the regular readers, he could of stayed a little longer so I didn’t feel like a whore, he could have spent some time on me being that I didn’t cum during our short sexcapade, he could of waited till he was ready to have sex again & tried to go a bit longer than the first time. He didn’t need to get up & leave making me feel cheap.

Now that I think about it, do I really want to catch up with this guy again?


Another Irish

Well this Irish guy really should have made me feel worse than I did afterwards. I was actually glad that I had a few men texting me & chatting to online so that when one was gone, there was another to pick up the slack, so to speak!

We text a lot during the night about what I’m going to wear – which wasn’t anything too exciting. I figure if you want the best of me, then you need to treat me better than a ONS (one night stand). We also talk about what we are going to do when he gets to my house, the texting gets a little sexy.

He rocks up to my house, pushed me against the wall & kisses me hard & sexy, that I get turned on quickly, I lead him to the bedroom, he pushes me on the bed, takes off just my jeans, pulls down his pants & boxers, I can see how hard he is. He lays down next to me, kissing me passionately & running his hand up my leg before he says “I can’t do this” What? “‘Are you serious?” I ask. He says yes, but kisses me again but he stops & says “No I really can’t do this” OMG. “Really?” I ask & he said really & stood up to put on his boxers & pants. I pull on my jeans, thinking that this can’t really be happening. But he leaves my room, I walk him to the front door & he actually leaves.

This guy drove about an hour, just to kiss me for 5 minutes, gets hard & turns me on but then ‘can’t do it’? What is that about? Perhaps his girlfriend cheated on him so he thought he would be able to cheat on her but when he got here to do it, he couldn’t go through with it? or perhaps he wanted a one night stand & then couldn’t do it or wanted to cheat but decides that he can’t. I of course think it’s me, I’m ugly, I’m fat, I’m a bad kisser, all sorts of bad thoughts about myself.

052816 (1).png

I actually think he added me again about six months later, after things ended with Milky & we were chatting quite a bit, he was of course getting sexual in his chat when I finally just said, I am not looking for anything casual, FWB (Friends with benefits) or a hook up, he said it didn’t have to be a one night thing, but I just said I’m looking for something different & deleted him. Once I thought it was the guy who came to my house then left, I figured that I didn’t need to go there again!



Guest Blogger: The One That Got Away

Another fabulous reader & also a fellow blogger has shared a few stories with me & allowed me to share some with you. This one almost made me cry (& I never cry!) – I have had a similar experience, you are all yet to read about! #WatchThisSpace!

OMG, tell me that didn’t tug at your heart string! Thanks Miss Slut for sharing.