Noddy #8

After Anzac day, Noddy & I chat daily as usual, I ask him what he is doing on the Saturday night because I know he’s home working on songs to go to the studio on Sunday, so I think rather than making him come all the way to my house, we’re both at home, we can catch up for a couple of hours. I will invite him out for dinner or something, he says “I want to say yes but I’m broke as shit because of this week… And I don’t expect you to pay. Haha. Don’t know if you noticed that” Of course I noticed that he’s paid for everything & basically because of all the public holidays with Easter & Anzac day, he hasn’t worked much this week, which is fine, I earn quite a lot more than him so I offer to pay for dinner being that he’s paid for every date almost, I also suggest the free movie tickets that I have too. He says “I don’t want to be a dick, but probably not tonight. Don’t think anything bad, I just wanna nail these songs tomorrow & as you know I get distracted so easy. Haha” I get disappointed, like fuck, how tragic am I that I finally ask this guy out & he says no… So I say that “I’ll stop distracting you & that I hope it goes well tomorrow” thinking that he needs time to write these songs but he says he’ll keep messaging me, but I think WTF?

Anyway I try not to read much into it – even though I can’t help but think of that stupid book ‘He’s just not that into you’ – which says basically in the whole book, if a guy isn’t trying to fuck you, he’s just not into you! Later we’re chatting & he asks how my night was & I say boring as fuck, he tells me that he should’ve come up… That just pisses me off even more, but I try not to show it. Why the fuck didn’t he come over? So I try to lighten my mood, I tell him that I know that there is a group on the chat app that if you do an autocorrect fail & someone calls you out on it, then you have to play truth or dare. So when he does a spelling error I tell him & say “So… Truth or dare Spark Plug?” surprising to me, he picks truth! I totally thought he’d be the dare type of guy but then he says that he’s in the “longest room” which was meant to be lounge so I call him out on another truth or dare. We play the game all night, he gets me to do a video of me cumming (easy), I never pick truth because I’m so scared what he’ll ask me about my past, with men or anything…. I find out his most interesting/weirdest place he’s had sex which was behind the school shed & in a fire escape. I also ask him to show me his most embarrassing piece of clothing & a screenshot of his camera roll (most of the photos were to me!) – Both dares would be terrible for me, I screenshot conversations all the time & save every photo he sends me, how would I explain that!?

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The next afternoon he chooses dare & I dare him to send me a video of him saying “You’re so sexy IBD4U” I instruct him not to move (in case he’s in the lounge room – hehehe), just do it where he is even if he’s with his roommates. He takes ages to do it but does send it telling me that he was driving. But in the video he’s walking. I think, well, that’s a dare fail. He says it’s not but he couldn’t do it while driving, I agree he shouldn’t do it while driving, however his video should’ve been in the car when he parked if I dared him not to move. He decides that because he fails, he loses a piece of clothing, I ask if he means forever, which he says yes. I say he has to give me his favourite jumper. He agrees that next time I see him, he’ll give it to me. He says he’ll come over after rope on Monday night. Well that’s an annoying late night for me, I don’t get home till about 10:00 pm but I figure that I want to see him, I need to make some sacrifices since we didn’t catch up over the weekend because of his lack of funds.

He dares me to show him my favourite rope picture, which isn’t a hard dare, he’s probably seen them all – so I send a few, he says things like “Fuck I love you in rope” the L word catches my breath as I read it… I know he’s said he loves having out with me etc but this is the first time I see it properly… I move on sending another picture “Fuck… it looks great though, like actually amazing hahaha not gif amazing” since we have this way of describing if something is amazing or not being that he says it all the time, I asked him once if it was gif amazing or sex amazing. He says “Fuck you are gorgeous” & the last one I send to him he says “Fucking hell… OMG woman, that is stunning. Fuck.” I dare him to send me a screenshot of his last text message, which I think he’ll probably hide some or something, but he doesn’t. He shows me a picture of his chat with Demon, of him sending her his song. I must admit, I get a little jealous… He hasn’t sent the song to me that he recorded… Did she ask or did he offer it up? & it reminds me of when Noodle didn’t tell me what they called the baby. Why is Noddy making me jealous, I’m not usually the jealous type… When I’m jealous, it means I like someone, more than like them, that I am scared of losing them… Am I starting to actually fall for this guy? A guy I didn’t even want to date?

The next day he tells everyone in the chat group that “This postie is making deliveries tonight. Hahaha” I like that he’s telling everyone that he’s coming to see me because there’s not backing out once he’s told everyone… I’m chatting at the same time, so it’s obvious that he’s talking about coming to see me. I actually feel pretty special & I think it’s cute that he wants everyone to know about “us” (for lack of a better word!) but also finally I’m not a secret for someone – it’s refreshing.

During the day, I’ve had some changes with my rigger & had ended up working things out that I would be changing riggers tonight, I guess it’s sort of like a dance partner when things change. Basically Ripples asked me if MilkyBar Kid was leaving town, I didn’t know he was leaving so I messaged & asked, he says “Not till the end of the year but why?”, I feel bad for telling him that I’ve been offered an opportunity with an advanced rigger to potentially work with & go to Melbourne with him & if he was leaving then perhaps I shouldn’t pass this opportunity. He says “Go for it” & I think what is the catch here?! MilkyBar Kid tells me that he was going to talk to me tonight about potentially finding a new rigger anyway but doesn’t elaborate, just says it’s nothing to do with me. I don’t get it but tell Ripples I will tie with him tonight.

I race home from work knowing Noddy is coming over tonight, I change my sheets, because I’ve been sleeping in our sex sheets still, I shave myself all over, clean the house & put the cans of coke I bought him in the fridge (Yeah another box, fucking loser!). I’m walking into rope, I want to talk to Milkybar Kid before it starts but can’t find him, I also want to chat to Ripples before we get started. Just so there is no weirdness being we’re swapping partners. But Noddy is messaging me with a photo of him in his favourite jumper that he has to give me tonight, but says “Haha… So I’ll have to give you the jumper next time I see you… I haven’t washed it yet haha… Was just in my toolbox & I got cold haha… Smells like mechanic” I ask him if he’s just trying to keep it longer & he says “I can’t lose my baby” I remind him that he shouldn’t have failed the dare or suggested giving up a piece of clothing (God knows what he’ll want of mine if I fail a dare! -Giving away panties has not gone well for me in the past!) I tell him to wash it now, so it’ll have time to dry before he comes over tonight then he says “Haha… Well would you rather I come over tomorrow & have dinner with you as well… That way it will be clean & ready to go… Just means no postie delivery tonight hehe…” I am walking into rope, it’s starting so I quickly write a reply “Up to you… I don’t really care about your hoodie TBH” As if he’s bailing on me as I walk into rope… Is this guy serious?! He says “I know that, but a dare is a dare. Plus I wouldn’t be able to stay tonight” Like WTF?! Why can’t he stay? Because it’s a Monday? We both have to work tomorrow. I can’t believe he’s bailing right when he knows where I am & what I’m doing… I shouldn’t reply while he’s just pissed me off but I say in a disappointed tone “Whatever, you’re the one that suggested tonight” It comes across way more bitchy that I intended, it’s supposed to be more a sigh, but he writes back straight away “Woah, I didn’t mean that to sound bad there hun… Not at all… Just knew you would be in a good mood from rope… but we would have more time together tomorrow” Well now I’m in a bad fucking mood, I hate with a passion when people bail! I have gone to effort by cleaning & shaving for the fucking guy to bail! I didn’t even want him to come over because I knew I’d be home late & rope relaxes me so I get really sleepy but I didn’t want to say no & then not see him this week.

After rope, the whole way home, I think that he will be in my driveway waiting for me, with his hoodie, knowing that he shouldn’t have bailed… Yes, I bet he’s there at my house ready to make it up to me! (Hahaha, as if, this is my life after all!) I read his message but I take ages to respond because I want to see if he’s at my house before I say something I’ll regret. I pull up to my house & he’s not there, my heart sinks, but I am not angry anymore, just fucking hurt & upset, so I just write “I’m not even sure what to say to this convo TBH… Tomorrow is ok” He writes back straight away “I’m sorry, neither do I really. We will work it out.” I roll over & go to sleep, I’m really upset, I get so fucking angry when I don’t get sex, when I thought I would, I know this, but I am also sad that I am not worth the drive for a couple of hours… Didn’t he say to me in the beginning that he’d jump in the car?

#IBD4U

Noddy #7

Noddy always sends me pictures of himself at work or home, sending me pictures of what he’s doing, which is usually writing music, I love how motivated he is… For a guy that left home at 13, I am surprised he has so much ambition. I did wonder if the weed smoking would be a problem, being that it’s not really my favourite thing, but it’s not. I mean he constantly looks stoned in every picture he sends me but I guess, it’s only ever going to be a problem if we get serious together.

I tell Noddy about the feature on our phone, we have the same phone! (OMG that’s a sign! Hahaha… Everyone is usually apple!) We have a pen that you can use to write on the screen for notes etc. I always said I wouldn’t ever use it, but I actually use it all the time. Noddy said he’s never used it, so I write him a note saying that he should use the pen it’s amazing. So he uses it to write me a message back saying that’s cute as fuck then draws abs on a shirtless pic of him. I can’t help but laugh when I see the detail he’s gone too…

He tells me that he’s had a headache all day & gone home from work. I suggest water, so he sends me a picture of the water bottle, it look like it’s had 2 sips out of it. I show him the bottle that I’ve drunk & he uses the pen to show me that there is a ladybug on my desk at work. I ask him how his hickey is (that he asked for – but I’m paranoid about him giving one to me.) He sends me pictures all night of his night, having a few beers with the boys. I like that we have our own lives, but that he wants me involved in this way, via messaging…

The next week it’s Anzac week – therefore a public holiday & Noddy says that he’s going to come over after work & stay the night. I am more excited than I should be… I wanted to take things slow with this guy & I’m seeing him like 2 – 3 times a week at this rate & it’s only been 3 weeks… Noddy gets to my house & I’m watching Revenge so we seem to just watch that. I can tell he’s tired, he’s had a lot of work going on, he’s working on his music, his mum had the accident, his friend in is hospital, his ex is sending him messages all the time, he’s got me – I’m not a walk in the park… I tickle his back & he slowly inches his way to lay his head on my legs… I keep tickling his back & I know he’s going to sleep & really relaxed. I bet he hasn’t been this relaxed in weeks. We lay like that for a while, just tickling his back.

We go to bed & have sex, him tying me up again to the x restraints, even though he’s tired, afterwards, we’re laying there with the lights off & cuddling, when I start rubbing his chest & cock… This is so unlike me to make the first move with a guy, but I want him again. He climbs on top of me & fucks me, but says after I’ve cum a few times that he won’t cum again this quick. I ask him to make me cum again before he stops, which he does & we fall asleep in each other’s arms…

He leaves fairly early the next day being that it’s a public holiday, I’m surprised by this, but I guess we can’t spend all day together, however I was hoping to exercise with him for a change. Hahaha. We’ll probably never do that! I guess we have had lots of sexercise.

Later that night he’s messaging me about how amazing it was when I was tickling his back, he says that he loved it but it should’ve been the other way around… No way, I love doing that stuff for him too… I want to make him feel wanted, I do want him, so I want him to feel that – I have trouble verbalising it, so I need to show him. As a submissive I don’t get to do that often. “I’m so glad… last night was amazing… Just being there & almost falling asleep on you like that was so nice… I’m glad you like doing it hahaha. I do like be sub every now & then haha. But I like being dom way more. I like the control in the bedroom hahaa. Everything outside I think is an equal thing. Showing affection and stuff like that. Hahaha. And I also don’t believe it’s a man’s job & woman’s job. Like sewing and washing. I think if you can do it why not?” He did offer to sew my dress up as I’d ripped it – it actually surprised me that he can sew… I can’t sew… He talks about the future so much that is scares me. Or talks about the things we will do, that I am getting caught up in it… I know from past experience, that generally the “we” stuff never happens with men I’ve me, yet I fall for it every time… I mean just look at all the sex toys I have bought over the years, even the trench coat for Abs, the lingerie for Noodle & have talked to numerous guys about using sex toys or bought them to use with them, but they never have enough time to use them with me!

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I suggest that we take some photos & video when we have sex next & he agrees… I mean what guy wouldn’t… He says that he doesn’t need it for inspiration when I say he can use it to rub one out, he says he doesn’t do that very often… What a lie! Hahaha…

I forgot, as he went to leave at Easter I was on his side of the bed (Fuck I’m calling it his side of the bed!) & I passed him the Easter present I gave him. He put it on my dresser & left it there… Well either he didn’t want it & I shouldn’t have given it to him, like a dickhead that I am or he just plain forgot it… He never mentions it though the week… I consider asking him how it was to see what he’d say but I don’t. He finally takes it at Anzac day & sends me a picture of him eating it… At least now I don’t feel like such a wanker for giving it to him. I thought honestly that he would have something for me for Easter, which is why I got him an egg… He’s talked about flowers & how he does that for no reason & that I deserve flowers… So I figured with how thoughtful he is with other things, he’d have something for me… But it’s not big deal that I have nothing from him. We have plenty of time for that stuff…

I, for some reason start calling him Spark plug, when I start thinking of nicknames that are related to cars. Ironically, though he has car trouble the next day & he tells me that it’s his spark plugs that were the problem! I kind of feel bad for his car but I don’t stop calling him spark plug. It’s a cute nickname, just for him. I have nicknames, but everyone calls me them!

I am, for once, looking forward to seeing where this goes…. There is no pressure or expectations like I thought there would be, we are just seeing where it goes & for the first time in my life, I don’t need a definition or a label. I am so content with this as it is, seeing each other every few nights & chatting daily when we can. It’s absolutely what I am looking for right now.

#IBD4U

Screenshots

So this isn’t my usual thing but I notice a lot of people on Instagram posting screenshots of chats from guys – I’ve always thought that was weird… But I guess I wrote about the guys I meet or chat to all the time… Hahaha, so what’s more weird talking about it or showing you a screenshot?!I guess it’s weird that I save the screenshot? But I do that for research & blog purposes only now. However some of the things people say don’t warrant a full 1000+ word blog post but perhaps they deserve a blog post in some way!Some post the persons name & pictures etc, but I will protect their identity & have blacked out (used the bomb emoji) what I can. But these are actual screenshots I saved of conversations that I’ve had on various sites over the course of my dating life. Some are these are from sites when I was just looking for sex, some are from sites when I was being serious about finding a partner, some are just random texts. See if you can tell what site is what. Hahaha.Thought it might be a fun change of pace for my blog posts… Hope you enjoy this format.

 

I never did get a knock knock joke from this guy… Did I ruin the chances with this guy by being a normal adult who doesn’t do knock knock jokes with other adults?!

 


 

Bahahaha… I’m a 10? Not quite sure that’s true, but what a way to get into my DM’s. However smooth lines no longer work on me.

 


 

Wow. I must be really boring… My dinner plans would usually result in them asking me out. Not this guy, I never got a reply, ever.

 


 

I will never understand why guys are so intrigued by a wax photo or rope picture but then not want to speak to me afterwards!? Apparently I am intimidating, does this make me more intimidating. Does it scare them?

 


 

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OH GOOD GOD!

 


 

Clearly not that keen to see me, as I never hear from him again! WTF is with that?

 


 

I tried for a while having rope pictures up on my profile to attract a kinkier type of man, however lots obviously think that because they can tie down a trailer, they can tie me up & I’ll allow it… Maybe this was a mistake.

 


 

OK what?!

Is this a bucket list thing for any woman? I mean I don’t mind cars & being interested in things a guy is, but don’t think this is the top of my bucket list!

Ironically, I realised I used to work with with this guy at the supermarket. I’m assuming he figured it out & that’s why he stopped replying? Who really knows…

I hate when a profile says stuff like this, this isn’t even the worst one I have seen, but why oh why don’t men just use the profile to talk about themselves, why do they talk about how shit other women are on these apps?!

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I cannot stand spelling errors in a profile. This is their time to shine… With all the auto correct failures theses days, this seriously can’t be one of them?! Surely this is satire?

This had to be a case of the wrong number… I have no idea how they got my number, or who they are. But I was having a few drinks with a friend so we had a laugh, but I didn’t get a reply. Hahaha.

Maybe my interesting fact wasn’t that interesting? I mean this guy never wrote back… Maybe that was a boring fact?! 

 

 


 

I honestly couldn’t be bothered writing back to this one, I hate the what are you looking for question. However at least when they ask & I answer, we’re both clear about what we doing… There’s no grey area.

 


 

What type of weirdo wishes their weekend was over?!

So there you have it… A difference in my blog posts… Hope you enjoyed this format. Something different. Let me know what you think. I might do some more like this if you like it.

#IBD4U

Noddy #6

Noddy & I wake up in the morning, it’s Easter. My rolling around wakes him up & he says “Morning gorgeous” & tells me he loves waking up next to me. I can’t really reply to that because I am emotionally retarded, I mean I do actually love this, I haven’t done this for a fucking long time & it was biggest fantasty with Noodle but I have a stupid brain that basically won’t let me tell this guy how much I like this… But I have also stupidly bought him a Easter egg, which I am now too embarrassed to give him. I get up twice before I get the courage to say to him “Oh look the Easter bunny has been.” He doesn’t really say thank you or seem to appreciate it, just putting it on the bedside table. I feel a bit dumb but he cuddles into me, then later on he does the same as yesterday, he makes me a cup of tea then goes outside for a smoke before coming back into fuck me.

We’re chatting about the group & he says something about sending a picture to the group of him in my bed… While I want him too because I remember how much I hated that Noodle & I were a secret, I am very aware that it’s only been a few weeks with Noddy. This will put pressure on us from everyone in the group. I don’t want to push this guy, I am very aware that I am liking him too much being that he’s stayed at my house basically all weekend, & there are so many red flags with him. He’s only just got out of a relationship… I am not over my previous relationship or whatever the fuck that was… I don’t want to hurt him just as much as I don’t want him to hurt me…

But he sends the picture & everyone knows… He’s in my bed… I secretly am happy but I am also concerned about what this will do to us… This is still new & fragile… I don’t want pressure on it.. I want to see where this goes without pressure or expectations.

We get up & eat leftover pizza for breakfast. I’m brushing my teeth walking around doing stuff when I see him in a bandanna & he says “Well… Obviously” just like Antoine Dodson & I literally spit my toothpaste everywhere & choke on the toothbrush. Fucking hell this guy is so hilarious, just exactly the sense of humour I want. Exactly what I am attracted too!

We sit around on the couch again watching Revenge & I now wish because of our conversations, if I offered to go exercise, I want to exercise with him, show him that side of me, but all I did was show him the fat slob side. As we’re sitting on the couch, I tell him that my family will be there soon for family dinner & he says that he better go, but he starts kissing me & we end up fucking quickly, both cumming hard. He tells me that I gave him “Fuck me eyes” I remember Noodle saying that I gave him ‘fuck me’ eyes before, but what the fuck are fuck me eyes? Whatever – who cares, I mean if I gave him that sign, it’s fine, I did want him to fuck me before he left. How much sex have we had this weekend!

As soon as he leaves, I empty the bathroom bin of the condom graveyard, have a shower & my parents rocks up 20 minutes after he leaves… Fuck that was close! Hahaha… My parents are never first to my house, nor are they ever early – like EVER! I message Noddy to tell him that was fucking close! Hahaha… No guy has ever met my family, well besides boyfriend. I wonder how some guys would react if they did meet my family?! I think he’d be ok with it…

Over the next couple of days Noddy & I talk a lot… He tells me that he’ll always be there for me to lend an ear & he’d do that for any of his friends because they’ve all helped him… He tells me that brought a tear to his eye… I tell him that he’s a good guy & he tells me I’m amazing. I offer up a hug if I could (which is so unlike me, but I am feeling for this guy right now) he says “I know you would. And that’s why you are amazing too” I tell him that we’re very alike in some ways but very different in others. He says “Yeah… I agree, it’s great having you in my life even if this ends up going nowhere & it’s just a fling… I’d be glad to call you my friend & someone I know. You are a great person” He wants this to be a fling? FUCK… I am so stupid! I have been really thinking about this man & being in his life & he wants me to be a fling?! I write back thanks with a smiley face because I have no fucking idea what to say to that… “Sorry, not trying to scare you away haha. That sounds bad… yeah.. I don’t have a great vocabulary when it comes to some of these things” I say that he didn’t scare me, but I am not sure what to say, because it’s true… He says that he just wanted me to know & I ask “You want me to know that I’m a fling?” he replies instantly “What no… that you are amazing & even if it ends I still wanna be friends” I have heard this from Noodle before… & look how well that turned out!! Hahaha… I mean can you really be friends with someone who’s been inside you?

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I tell him later that I am surprised at how much I actually like him, which is so unlike me, I never tell guys how I’m feeling because it usually comes back to bite me in the ass. I surprise myself by telling him this & he says “Nwwww, that’s cute as fuck. Thanks heaps that means a lot to me. You are amazing #IBD4U. I love spending time with you.” WOW… I didn’t expect that from him… Though I guess this guy does tell me more than any other guy so far how much he likes me… He sends me a shirtless picture & I tell him off because I’m horny. I say “I’ll send you naked pics when you’re horny & see how you like it” Then I realise that’s a stupid threat. He tells me it’s the best threat ever. But he’d prefer the real thing than a picture “Fuck pictures… I’d rather get in the car” It’s good that the distance isn’t going to be a problem, I really was worried about that… So many guys tell me that the distance isn’t an issue, then it becomes one. I tell him that I don’t send nudes often anyway because of my breast reductions scars from 6 years ago. He says “Yeah… I get that… but they look amazing… Fuck the scars. I think they just define your beauty even more… Shows how much you’ve been though” JESUS CHRIST this guy is smooth as fuck!

I need to put a wall back up here… I mean I met this guy in the chat app & I’ve seen it ruin lives… I mean, mine for one with Noodle… It ruined his & his partners… I am so cautious of people, but I’m also trying not to tar him with the same brush. He says “Even if you do, I’ll wash that away & show you a different colour… Take as much time as you need. I’ll be here, it’s what I do” Oh really? Wow… While he doesn’t know my history & I’m going to avoid telling him the ins & outs if I can about Noodle, if we get that far, but I am glad he’s willing to take this slow & see where it goes. I pose the same question that I posed to Noodle once or twice “Why me?” he says “The mystery. The previous encounters. The beauty. Something I’m not used too. Maturity, deep conversations. I won’t lie, I used to go for stupid little girls all the time… Sick of the drama.” Well I’m sure there is drama with me, I won’t deny that! Hahaha but he says there is a lot less.

He tells me about some drama with his ex girlfriend today, he tells me that she’s been messaging him, wanting him back… FUCK, I feel a pang of jealously! Most people do go back, I mean look at Noodle… However I listen & try to be subjective, not like a jealous chick listening into his private conversations with a conflict of interest. He says “It’s good to talk to someone about this shit, & when I’m with you, I forget all about that shit.” I am glad he can talk to me & I say so, but “I don’t want to just be your rebound fling & get hurt myself” Even though I know that I’m the first he’s been with since her, he says “I don’t want to hurt you at all. That’s the last thing I want to do. You are an amazing person” I tell him that his fling comment has me a bit worried. I’m not going to lie either. “Yeah but please don’t panic… I don’t want you to think anything into it too much… I don’t want this to be a fling. It’s just I wanna be 100% honest with you about what’s happening. I feel it’s the only right thing to do” Fuck I love how mature this guy can be… While he doesn’t always say the right thing, he sometimes says the most perfect thing to put me at ease… Maybe too at ease… But I am glad I am letting my guard down with this guy… It kind of feels right…

#IBD4U

Noddy #5

Wednesday comes & Noddy comes over after work, we start to watch a movie but are more cuddly this time this time from the start, I am not normally a cuddling person so I’m surprised he’s gotten me to this point so quickly. It feels good to just have a few drinks with him & sit to relax – feeling comfortable with him. He seems more at ease at my place, he tells me before that he’s going to bring work clothes. He gets addicted to the TV show I’ve been watching which is really old, Revenge, but I watched a few seasons when it was on TV but didn’t watch it all so I have no idea what happened. He watches it & gets engrossed in it, but we end up going to the bedroom to have sex, he talks a lot more this time as in dirty talk, which I like & enjoy. We fuck a couple of times before he says that he can’t stay as he got halfway here & realised he forgot his boots… I am disappointed but it’s a school night so it’s ok if he leaves. But he could just get up earlier & go home to get them – since his house is on the way to his work, but he decides not to stay over. That’s ok, like I said I don’t sleep well when he’s over so I am ok for him to go home.

I wake up the next morning, rolling over & actually disappointed that he’s not there, fuck that was an unexpected disappointment… I look at my phone to find a message from him at 1:52 am “OMG… I can’t sleep again. Haha. I have you on the brain so bad… I’m sitting here thinking about how I should’ve stayed… And how I’m going to make it up to you when I come over tomorrow night. I can’t wait to see you. And I can’t wait to feel you squirm underneath me. Or feel you laying on my chest just relaxing on the couch. I hope this was a great message to wake up too. Haha. Good morning” WOW fuck yes that was a good message! I am wishing he stayed but he’s planning to stay at my house for Easter a couple of nights. We’ve discussed exercising & going out, so it should be a good weekend & it will be the longest I’ve ever spent with a guy in 12 fucking years! I am liking this guy too much… There are red flags everywhere, why has he been able to break down my barriers so easily & so rapidly? Probably because he’s such a smooth talker…

On Easter Friday I am at my families house, he says that he’s going to come over about 7:00 pm, I had in my head that it’d be a little earlier than that so when I get home, I clean my house. I am always conscious of that fact that my house is apparently “too clean” as per Noodle but I mean this is who I am, I can’t be anything different from who I am. I hope that Noddy doesn’t use that I’m too clean against me, he’s already told me I have an eye for interior design, a few times actually…

He comes over & we have a few drinks watching Revenge again, he’s been so invested in it, asking me what is happening every night that I watch it. When we’re kissing on the couch, he goes down on me, which is so fucking good, it actually surprises me that a guy so young who’s had the same girlfriend for the last 8 years, but I’m happy that he is good at it. But I sit up, once I’ve cum & he looks alarmed, I kiss him & tell him that I want him to take me into my bedroom & tie to the bed & do what he wants. A smile quickly spreads across his face, I mean what guy could ever say no to that…

After we fuck & I cum & cum, he cums too, I realise that he’s not very cuddly after sex, usually jumping up to dispose of the condom then gets dressed going out for a smoke. This is when I usually like a cuddle. I lay there & look at my phone, I jump in the chat room & see a comment to me which I reply too. Noddy then jumps in & says “Damn, Why are you awake gorgeous girl” I say that I tried but couldn’t sleep so he says “Bahaha… well… Cuddle someone amazing… and sleep bitch hahaha” That’s about when he comes into my room laughing. Demon then says “Eww, stop being cute guys” so obviously he’s told her that he’s at my house. Noddy says “Never I’m a cute cunt” & Demon posts a picture of Antione Dodson (for those who don’t know who he is, it’s a YouTube video from a few years ago. I’ll post it so you can see, it’s hilarious!) Noddy doesn’t know who he is so I show his this video.

I show Noddy the video & we literally laugh our heads off while entwined with each other. He starts posting the lyrics in the group but then I decide to go to sleep, so I say goodnight, Demon tells Noddy “Look after her” & I smile, putting down my phone, knowing she is not a threat or anything I should be jealous of. She’s a proper girl code chick, these 2 are just friends. Noddy does the same, putting his phone on the bed next to him & rolling over to cuddle into my back, he spoons me so well… It’s been so long since I’ve been spooned & I fucking hate that I like it!

The next day we laze around in bed. I wake up a million times to him either snoring, talking in his sleep or because I’m hot because he’s too close, being that his phone has half my king sized bed. We toss & turn taking it in turns to spoon each other. I always find it weird when I spoon him that my head is like halfway down his back. I contemplate telling him we should go for a run, exercise or something, but I just want morning sex, which I get. He gets straight up & makes a coffee & makes me a tea then goes out for a smoke.

When he comes back we have sex again… I mean I can’t help it… When we get up I cook him breakfast of bacon & eggs… I have bought bread rolls, which I don’t eat on my carb free diet & so he says that I’m a legend for getting them for him… Yeah I am stupid, I do things like this then feel stupid, like buying him cans of coke I drink sugar free lemonade so don’t usually stock coke in my fridge. We sit around on the couch all day, as it gets later, I keep thinking we should go exercise or something, we’ve been talking about it, so why not… He says he wants to help me. But I don’t, I stay in my nighty thing while he heads out smoking. Some reason we’re talking about how many times we’ve fucked & I say “Who’s keeping count” He’s almost out the door so he turns & bobs a bit putting up his hand & says “Yo” I literally burst out laughing… Fuck I am so attracted to someone that can make me laugh with this kind of banter! Damn you Noddy for breaking down these walls! FUCK.

noddy pure love guarded woman

About 3:00 pm or so, he comes inside & says “I’m going to have to go shithead”, I don’t even know what to say, he was supposed to stay here tonight too… I can’t hide my disappointment, I can’t stand it when people bail. I ask what’s happened & he says that he just got a call to say his mum was in a car accident. FUCK. I tell him to go, that’s fine. I do say that he can come back if everything is ok & he says “really?”, I say of course being that I was planning him being there anyway so I am not doing anything. I hope his mum is ok & he leaves to go to the hospital. I have to say that the cynic side in me doesn’t really believe his story, I mean I have no reason not to believe him, but I never heard him on the phone & it conveniently happened while he was outside… Fuck there is something wrong with me… I can’t help but think this shit!!

Later he texts me when he knows his mum is ok & I say that he can come back to see me, I tell him that he’s welcome to bring his weed (not that I am into that, but I know that he is & wonder if that is a reason he doesn’t stay. Max used to smoke weed at my house, so whatever) & just chill with me & a few drinks. He says that he’d really like to be there – I don’t think that he will come back, but the offer is there – it’s a lot of petrol to & from my house. But to my surprise, he gets back to my place about 7:00 pm that night. We have dinner, that I cook, healthy salad & meat & just relax on the couch. He smokes his weed so I think that makes him happier & more relaxed… He tells me that this is the healthiest he’s eaten in a while too. He tells me

We go to bed & have sex again, I swear to god, I can’t wait to not use condoms with this guy. I am getting my pap smear in a few weeks, where I’ll have a STI check, following all the drama with Noodle’s partner blaming me for her STI… Just another check to make sure I am ok still – it’s been about 6 months since my last STI check & time for my next pap smear so may as well do it again since the dr will be up there… I am planning to ask him to get a check & then we can have unprotected sex… I hate the disruption of putting on a condom. I wonder if he is going to be ok with that conversation, it basically means we’ll be exclusive… But I’m not ready to call him my boyfriend but I’m ready to say that we’re not fucking anyone else…

#IBD4U

Rob Rob #3

So I’ve mentioned Rob Rob a lot throughout my stories, he’s always in my messages chatting to me sporadically, he’s been chatting to me again, but again always on his terms, when he’s free & when he can chat. Then he disappears for days coming back to say that he’s trying to be good & not be online – if you remember he is actually married. However I always fall in the trap of having phone sex with him over the chat app or texting him pictures of me in lingerie & all sorts. I don’t know how I get wrapped up in this guy. I guess he’s the only real dominant man in my life that sets me tasks or makes me do things I don’t really want to do but they turn me. I really need a proper dominant partner!

We’re chatting one day as usual & he asks me to add him to my kink chat app group but I say no & change the subject. Firstly if he wanted to be in it, he could just find it, he knows how to use the app, he doesn’t need me to add him… But now the shoe is on the other foot, hahaha, I don’t want to add him to the group because I know that there a chicks in the group that would message him & he’d get caught up in their sexting & he’d forget about me. What a fucking turn around! So messed up!

Rob Rob never too busy.png

One day I’m driving home, he starts messaging, I’m home early from work & he’s being suggestive so I say that he should come over, he says he wants too & really if he got in the car when he started suggesting it, he could’ve made it to my house, fucked me & then got home all before his wife, without being suspicious. However he doesn’t. I get home, get naked & video chat with him while we both cum – me more times than him, as I am told too. Again after that he disappears.

When he comes back we chat a bit, I try not to reply straight away, but I am always free when he messages, it fucks me off. One afternoon, I’m having some man trouble, with Noddy& Rob Rob just tells me to message him & stop the bullshit… It’s not my bullshit. I don’t get why this guy has suddenly changed…. But then Rob Rob asks me what I’m wearing. Next minute I’m sharing my erotica fiction – scene one – Nipple Bells while clipping on my nipple clamps & sticking a vibe between my legs while he tells me to video myself cumming. I am waiting for permission to cum as he is off doing something else as fucking usual, he’s not paying attention to me while I’m cumming for him. I tell him that he missed out because I already came. He says he was reading my story but I don’t think that’s entirely true as the messages sit at sending for a while.

I do as I’m told he tells me I’m a good girl then tells me to cum again. I ask if I can take the nipple clamps off which he lets me. I’m thankful, I was using another vibe on the nipple clamps, which turns me on even more but they were beginning to hurt. He makes me cum for him 3 more times in a 20 minute period then asks if he gives me a task would I do it? I say of course. But when he asks for me to fuck someone tonight, I know I can’t do it. I don’t want just random sex with a loser guy, I want to have regular sex with a guy. Doesn’t have to be my boyfriend but just someone regular, someone who isn’t trying to fuck everyone!

Later that day usually he’s offline as soon as he gets what he wants, so I’m surprised he’s chatting to me most of the night – where is his wife? I guess, mainly because he wants me to find someone to fuck tonight & video it, which I am not that keen on right now. As if a random guy would want to video us having sex?! He asks what I’m doing & I say that I’m watching TV & writing, he asks what I’m writing but I avoid the question, just like I do with every guy when I tell them I am writing (Why do I ever tell them that I am writing? I have told Noddy I’m a writer too!? Of course they ask what. I just say that I’m a freelance writer for some blogs about health, beauty, travel & love. Hahaha.) I don’t want them to know that I am writing a blog about them, I mean this guy is even has a couple of posts & is mentioned a fair bit… But he asks me again to I tell him. I end up telling him that I have a blog, I am not sure why I do. He asks to what it’s about & when I tell him he asks to read it. I tell him that he’s in it, which he doesn’t seem to mind. He says that the stories will turn him on because he’s heard about them as they were happening, since we used to chat a lot, I used to tell him about the guys I was fucking, I’m pretty sure he’s been one of the only guys that didn’t act jealous when I told him about the guys I was fucking. Guys say they don’t get jealous & want to hear about it but then they act weird. Rob Rob may get jealous wishing things were different, I guess, but he never acts weird about it.

He starts reading my blog & tells me that I’m a good writer (I hope so! Hahaha) & it was good for him to read his post. He starts to get worried people will know who he is, but honestly, it’s only obvious to him because he’s reading about himself. No one else will ever know, I try to be as respectful as I can to the guys I write about, it’s not entirely their fault it didn’t work out with me.

The next day Rob Rob calls me on the way to work to chat, we chat about the blog & the stuff going on in my dating life right now. He tries to get me to meet him for lunch as he’s home from work, but I say no as it’s my day in the office, however when my boss isn’t at work that day I suggest we meet for lunch as I can leave the office but he then he says no, I should wait to see what happens tonight… WTF? I don’t think I will ever understand men!

I’m also a little surprised though but also a little chuffed when he tells me that he considers us to be friends, bound by kink. I mean I agree, but I never thought he would say that to me! I guess these douchy dominate guys don’t come across to have a heart like they really do sometimes. I mean I was always the same with Noodle, when he said he loved me, I never thought those words would come out of his mouth!

#IBD4U

Noddy #4

The next morning I wake up at 5:00 am, I can’t sleep. WHAT THE ACTUAL FACTUAL FUCK HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?! I toy with the idea of deleting Noddy, Demon & the guy she’s fucking (though it turns out Noddy had the wrong dude! So I would’ve deleted the wrong guy Hahaha.) But I decide not too, I calm down a bit & decide that I need to find out what happened… I actually chat to Rob Rob about it ironically, yes I’ve been chatting to him again, he’s always around, he tells me to give the guy a chance, to find out his side of the story, maybe he didn’t get lost for 3 hours with Demon? Because that’s what I think happened… My mind goes weird places sometimes… Maybe he did try to find me, but then why wouldn’t he message?

I decide to write him a message when out to brunch with my friend “Hey, what the hell happened to you last night?!” I wait with baited breath for his reply with comes 20 minutes later “Heya, was gonna ask you the same thing, you just disappeared after I went down for a smoke, I came back up & your friend said you were playing pool, but I couldn’t find you” Why didn’t he text me then? “You realise that was like 3 hours apart you going for a smoke & me playing pool? I was actually waiting for you to come back up for ages” Like really Noddy? “Fk… I didn’t… Not at all, I’m sorry, time isn’t my strong suit. Hahaha especially when drinking. You should’ve message me… like oi dick come back…” Yeah he’s right, I should’ve text him but he should’ve come back without me having to be a nagging wife… “I just assumed if you wanted to hang with me, you’d come back I’m not going to beg you. You also turned me on quite a lot, I was actually going to ask you to come home with me, I’d already kinda decided that earlier but was trying to be good, but then you were kissing my shoulders… mmmm… oh well” I hope he realises what he gave up last night “That’s fair, I feel heaps bad… I just get sidetracked so easy when I drink.. Fuck… You have no idea how much I adored you last night… You looked stunning… I’m sorry I missed that opportunity, I’ll make it up to you. Well I want to.” We chat about it & realise that we both should’ve done different things that night, He understands why I am disappointed & he says that he’s genuinely sorry he missed me in Rope. I tell him it’s ok, I do rope for me so it doesn’t matter if he missed it. He reads it & never replies the rest of the day but chats in the group… WTF dude… I don’t understand this guy sometimes.

Noddy suck at flirting

The next day again he chats in the group but not to me – again, sending pics of him working on cars & whatnot, so I take matters into my own hand, I am done with games. Either this guy is into me, or not. Doddy says he thinks I became victim of weed, losing track of time, so I think I need to see what this guys deal is – Doddy also gives me snaps for being so bold to message Noddy first. I message & ask if he is free to watch a movie at my house after my family dinner. It’s Sunday night so I don’t expect much to happen, I have the next day off, so I don’t mind if it’s a bit later, but I know he’ll have to work tomorrow about an hour from my house. He says “Hell yes” that he wants to come over. I tell him about 8:30 pm – 9:00 pm that my family will be gone, I send him my address but tell him that I will message him when they are leaving. They start packing up at 7:50 pm, it’s earlier than usual for school holidays so I message him, knowing the drive is about 45 minutes to my house. He tells me that he’s already on his way & was just going to park somewhere so he was here as early as possible… OMG that’s so fucking cute!

He gets to my house & I offer him a drink, he can’t decide what he wants but I tell him can have anything from my bar he wants, I have also bought cans of coke while at the shop for him – like some kind of loser that I am. He finally decides & we watch ‘Suicide Squad’ because the next Switch theme is Gotham & I haven’t ever seen a batman movie, which no one can believe… We cuddle on the couch but my back has been heaps sore lately that I get uncomfortable, so we move a bit then we end putting on ‘The Dark Knight’ but don’t watch it all because he kisses me, we get naked, well I am in sexy lingerie for him – which he probably doesn’t deserve, but I want to show him who I really am. He doesn’t take it off me, because I think he likes what he sees, he goes down on me which is so good, when he slips his fingers in me, I am scared I’m going to squirt so because we’re on the couch, I ask to take this to the bedroom which he agrees.

He goes down on me again, & he’s a lot better than I think he’s going to be, I cum quite hard enjoying the pleasure that I haven’t had from another guy in a few months. I push him down on the bed & suck his cock, knowing I won’t be able to get this in my mouth, but I try to take it all, he seems to enjoy it but doesn’t make a lot of noise. I climb on top of him kiss his neck, which he seems to love… He shivers the whole time but I want him inside me. He then flips over so he’s on top of me again, asking for a condom, I pull one out, he slides it on & I brace myself. But he fits inside me well, I’m surprised his giant long cock doesn’t hurt me – very surprised. He fucks me well, making me cum before he says “I’m not gonna lie, I just came” I giggle & say that’s ok, I’ve already cum so it was ok & he’d gone down on me for ages, making me cum multiple times.

We lie around talking, cuddling for so long, I lay on top of him kissing his neck which when I rub my hands through his hair, he gets goose bumps all over, I get that he likes it so I keep doing it… When he’s had enough, I look at the clock it’s almost 2:00 am. I want to ask if he’s staying but I also don’t want him to think I am trying to kick him out, I do want him to stay over but I also don’t want to be too eager. So I finally build up the courage & he says he should go, but doesn’t move, we keep lying there chatting & I just say to him “Turn off the bloody light” with a giggle, which he does & we snuggle down to sleep. It’s been so long since I slept with someone all night, it was so good. I actually don’t sleep well with someone in my bed but I do like him there. I am sort of sleeping when his alarm starts going off, we cuddle closer & he says “Good Morning Gorgeous” & I wonder what the fuck my face & hair looks like right now. We kind of close our eyes but his phone keeps going off. I want sex so we start kissing & have some hot morning sex before we get up. We talk a little bit more during sex, as I notice us loosening up with each other, where we do connect. He gets up & gets dressed but says he doesn’t want to go, knowing that I don’t have to work today. He says that he should call in sick, I say yeah call in sick & giggle knowing that he should go to work, I tell him to go. But he takes ages to piss fart around before he actually leaves.

He messages me later in the morning to wish me luck for my day, knowing that I have a job interview & I thank him for that. He knows that if I get this job, I will have to buy a car, he’s offered to come look at the car with me, being that he’s a mechanic. I am stupidly excited about this, I know I said I didn’t want a relationship, but this is a very boyfriendy thing to do & I feel myself soften to him even more. Later we talk about a 50’s housewife & he googles dresses to send to me in my signature colours, I think it’s hilarious but also adorable. We arrange for him to come over the following Wednesday after work & I almost can’t wait to see him again.

During the week though, he tells me that he’s got some bad news, I wonder what it is but I don’t want to pry. He tells me that one of his mates was beaten up by her partner. Having been though a domestic violent situation with my friend recently, I understand how it affects those around it too, because you think about the things you should of done, the signs etc. I offer him advice & let him know that I have been though a similar thing recently, I don’t talk about it much but I feel like he needs to know that I can empathise with him. He says that his friend is in the hospital & he’s going to feed her animals. This guy is so busy, he’s got so much going on, but yet he still makes time for me, he still makes me feel special. I am so glad he’s this type of friend, because it’s the same as me… I would do anything for my friends, anytime that they ask me.

#IBD4U