Spotify

A while ago, I said I was going to make a Spotify play list for heartbreak & the songs that make me feel powerful. I have been working on this a while & with a writers block preventing me from writing – I don’t know if this is because stuff I have going on in my life right now, or the story that’s coming, but I am struggling to write for my blog at the moment… Writers block is eminent!

So this is a lame cop out of a blog post! Hahaha… SORRY.

I’ve had writers block before, but usually I can push through it, however, at the moment, I have a lot of things going on personally at the moment, that aren’t putting me in a good frame of mind. These issues in my life are 100% not related to dating, so don’t get excited for juicy posts coming up. Things that happened in 2019 are catching up with me in more ways than one, but again like I said it’s not about dating so I won’t bore you with the details, but it’s making it hard to write about anything – something I love doing, along with other hobbies that have been taken away from me recently, which express my creative side… It’s hard to be positive on here sometimes.

Spotify 2019 destroyed us a little

So anyway this blog is about the playlists that I was creating a while ago on Spotify. I hope you enjoy them. There are 4 on the #IBD4U account.

  • 💔 – brokenhearted songs
  • ♥ – love songs
  • 💪- strong recovery songs.
  • 📻 – Podcast (the only one that I was on & the hopes that my own podcast will get off the ground one of these days!)

These songs I’ve added obviously mean something to my story for me & have mostly featured in my story, so I hope they take you back to the place in the blog where they featured!

I have made them collaborative, so you can (hopefully) add songs to it too… I’d love to hear what you add.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2DylrroylukVDl5AeMD7Ai?si=trN74nqFTDauRI9U1RrmVQ

Sorry again for a lame post today, but I have been meaning to share these, there were going to be on a non blog post day but I hope that I have a proper post for you on Friday!

In the mean time, enjoy listening!

What do you think?!

#IBD4U

My Musings

So here’s what’s up:

For those of you that follow the blog on Facebook & saw a reader comment repeatedly calling me a ‘slut’, a ‘home wrecker’ & I believe that everyone who commented were labelled ‘spastic sluts’ also, then as any keyboard warrior does, it was deleted – not by me, while I don’t condone this kind of hate speech directed as someone personally, I believe everyone has a right to an opinion & so I won’t delete or block someone from having a difference of opinion to me.

However, I think it’s a timely reminder that THIS IS MY DIARY. I am not forcing you to read, I am not writing to get advice or be told how to live my life or how shit I am or what I’ve done is wrong. You may have an opinion on what I write – I know I have opinions on other blogs I read, on my choices on what I do, you often have advice for me (even though we’re still reading about 2019 – I thank you for your advice), you all engage in the story & I love that! My favourite part of my readers, is when there is an online troll, you all jump to my defence, sometimes before I even see the comments. Thank you for that.

I am not perfect.

I make mistakes.

I am not proud of some of the things I have done.

Would I change it if I could? Perhaps.

But I don’t regret my decisions.

I have read a lot over the years from other blogs, articles etc, which all have an opinion on cheaters – some good, some bad, most say don’t blame the mistress, blame the person you are in a committed relationship with – regardless if you chose to stay or not, they are the ones you need to make things right with. I get you can hate her or him, they did make a decision to fuck your partner too but they aren’t the one who did wrong by you, they aren’t committed to you.

I watched as a 20 year old, my parents go through infidelity, I never found out how long the affair was with my mums best friend, but I don’t think it was long. I don’t know if there were feelings involved, but I know my parents went to counselling to get through it, so I know that marriages can survive infidelity. I’ve never said that every marriage is doomed after someone cheats.

My musings she is me

I have never denied that Silverlining & his partner couldn’t work though his infidelity & come out the other side stronger – I sort of hoped for that because then he wouldn’t be online ever again & maybe I would have been able to move on. But how can you come out the other side, or get over infidelity when either party aren’t willing to work on it? Lets take his partner for example, bringing me up daily, never letting him forget me. Does that sound like forgiveness? She knows he was in love with me – that he broke my heart via her stalking my Facebook, I believe that she knew the affair was over a year long too. Personally, I would never want to bring up the mistress if my partner ever cheated on me & I chose to stay, especially if I knew that he loved her. I would want him to forget her & his feelings for her but bring her up daily would remind him that he’s not with her & that I’m not over it either – I’m still punishing him in a way. If there were multiple women, with no feeling, I think that would be easier to get over, he would honestly be able to say to me that it meant nothing. I discuss this in my blog Cheat vs Affair. Lets take Silverlining for example – yes many of you say that he’d do the same to me if we were together, however if he was really committed to her, he never would have looked online for gratification that he craves. Regardless of what we think if it’s right or wrong, so many men & women do this daily, find people to chat too online, perhaps meet to fill a void they have with their relationship.

I am not an expert in relationships. I do not even pretend to know what I am doing in my own life to be really honest with you. But I do believe that happy people, in love with their partner, truly committed to their partner would never cheat on them. Use all the excuses in the world, but I don’t believe if you are happy & committed, that you’d be willing to risk all that for a bit of side sex… I don’t know, like I said I’m no expert & happy to hear your opinions, have you cheated? Why did you cheat? Were you looking for something else? Were you trying to fill a void? What does that void mean? Have you been cheated on? Did you get the apology vomit from your partner? Did you stay with them or did you walk?

But just wanted to say, again. I am not perfect. You’re just reading one side of the story, one side of a very big story. There are multiple people involved here, you hear one side. My rose coloured glasses side.

But if my story upsets you, don’t read it. It has triggers. So stop reading. I promise you if you’re hating it, just stop reading!

#IBD4U

Spirit Animal

A friend shared this on her Facebook & I thought it was a great article & I realised that I found my spirit animal.

I laughed a lot with this article then has a weird thought, if female dragonflies have to fake their own death to avoid sex with a predator dragonfly, then what hope so we all have? Actually, I laughed a lot, but this is quite disturbing. It’s almost like a woman having to pretend she has a boyfriend to stop a guy from talking to her. Spirit Animal.png

Female Dragonflies Fake Their Death To Avoid Males

Everyone has those nights when their significant other comes to bed and — for one reason or another — they decide to feign sleep to avoid talking or … doing other stuff.

Well, female dragonflies take this kind of sneaky sexual rejection to the next level — faking their own deaths to avoid having sex with aggressive males.

Scientists recently captured this phenomenon on video for the first time while observing moorland hawker dragonflies in the Swiss Alps.

In the newly released footage, the female is seen freezing mid-air and plummeting to the ground, where she lies motionless until the male leaves.

(When researchers approached the females, they immediately flew away — showing they remain alert throughout the fake death.)

This behavior, which has been previously observed in five other species, is called sexual death feigning. It’s believed to have developed as a survival tactic, since female dragonflies often risk injury or death when coerced into mating.

“In a lot of dragonflies, males try to seize the female with or without consent,” Rassim Khelifa, a biologist who recently published a study on the phenomenon, told National Geographic. “The fittest — that is the fastest, most powerful male — is usually the one who mates.”

Male dragonflies often pounce on their female victims as they bask in the sun by the water. After a female has laid eggs once, Khelifa found, she’s pretty much met her quota for sexual interaction.

And that’s when she starts playing dead.

It’s apparently an effective escape method, since more than 60% of the females who employed it successfully deceived their male pursuers — and every female who didn’t was intercepted.

Other methods used by female dragonflies to avoid having sex include laying their eggs in dense vegetation and avoiding areas heavily populated by males.

Sexual death feigning isn’t only used by the ladies, though.

On the opposite end of insect gender relations, male wolf spiders often play dead to avoid getting eaten after getting laid.

So next time human dating is stressing you out, take comfort in the fact that you always know whether or not your date is alive.

Here is the link to the website if you would like further reading. https://thewildchild.co.za/female-dragonflies-fake-their-death-to-avoid-males/

One thing though I disagree with is the knowing if your date is alive. I always pretend that the guy if he doesn’t text me back, that he died. I mean why else wouldn’t a guy want to text me back after meeting me? Surely it’s because he died… Hahaha…

My eyelash lady told me the other day who’s been in a relationship since high school with the same guy, that relationships aren’t always what they’re cracked up to be. I get that, I am not that stupid to think that a man will complete me, I don’t need a man to complete me. I am a strong independent woman, so I am not worried about being completed. But I want a partner. I mean I haven’t had a proper boyfriend since Boyfriend abut 12 years ago now. Well Noodle did say I was his ex girlfriend, but can I really consider what I had with him a relationship?

#IBD4U

The Love Of Your Life Only Comes After The Mistake Of Your Life.

A friend shared this article on their FB page a while ago, while it’s not technically a blog nor a story about dating, it really hit home for me after the whole Noodle debacle & I really have to agree.

I hope that after Noodle, I can have the love I deserve!

The Love Of Your Life Only Comes After The Mistake Of Your Life.

“Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate.” ~ Carrie Bradshaw

Perhaps we need to be broken first before we can finally become whole.

Painful love is the worst kind of heartbreak. It’s the one we had such high hopes for, the one we gambled everything for—only to find it was a bet that would never be won.

So we break into a million small pieces of ourselves and wonder how we could have gotten it so wrong.

We make mistakes in love.

We choose people based on the lessons that our souls need to learn without realizing that it’s usually those difficult lessons we need to experience the most.

We can’t be changed by ease and we can’t have our minds broken open by the mundane—instead it can only happen when we are left with nothing but ourselves and our regrets.

Maybe there is no such thing as a mistake if we indeed needed it to learn more about who we are and how we love, but still there are those loves we wish we could rewind and just take back. The ones whose endings were too painful for us to want to permanently claim as part of our history.

But no matter how much we wished that this love was something other than what it was, it will never change the reality that the only reason we needed this love in our lives was to break our hearts.

The thing is, we need that big mistake to help propel us toward the love of our life.

We need to be broken in order to find out how we want to put ourselves back together.

Often times the biggest mistake of our lives is a relationship that we should have walked away from the minute it began—or at the very least should have let go of long before we actually did, and way before it all went downhill.

But we didn’t, and it’s not because that love was meant to be, but because without it we might never have realized what love truly is.

We always have the choice to stay in a relationship that is a constant battle of wills and ideals. Yet, no matter how many times we hope it will end differently, or just maybe work this time around—it never does.

This is because it’s not meant to.

Our mistake is meant to end, usually bitterly, and often catastrophically. Its purpose is to rock us to our core and challenge our very self and our beliefs about love.the mistake only comes after the love of your life.pngWe are meant to question what went wrong, and to wonder what love really means to us. This isn’t an overnight process , but one that we need to take the time to immerse ourselves in until we no longer hide from the truth that our hearts whisper.

It’s a state of healing that lets us know that we can send someone our love, but we can also walk away with our heads high and our faith strong knowing that we haven’t messed up the best thing we ever had.

Because the love of our life is out there waiting for us and when we meet there will be no question about why we needed to have our hearts broken in the way we did.

There won’t be battles to conquer, or qualities to be changed. There won’t be unfulfilled needs, or drama around every corner. In reality, this love is going to show us why none of our previous relationships worked out.

Because all along they were only leading us to this—the person who was created just for us, and somehow through the meandering paths that life takes, ended up not being perfect, but still being perfect for us.

Our worst mistake and our deepest heartbreak is only meant to help lead us to the love of our life—because without it, we might never know what that actually looks like.

The love of our life only comes when we are ready for it. When we have broken apart who we thought we should be and instead embraced who we are. This love only appears when we have gained the ability to believe that we deserve what we want.

The love of our life won’t look or feel like anything we’ve ever experienced. It might come softly, or it might even enter as a wrecking ball. It may come dressed as friendship, or perhaps something so hot we thought for sure we would get burned. But, because of that great mistake we are not the same people we once were, so we will approach love differently as well.

We will look for the peace instead of the intensity of the storm.

We will allow ourselves to gaze past the superficial and instead appreciate the energy that this person brings into our lives, reveling in the new-found depths of connection that we are experiencing.

Slowly we will realize that it’s not necessarily who someone is, but rather what type of person they bring out in us that determines whether it’s a once-in-a-lifetime kind of love.

With time, an understanding develops that love should not only feel like it adds value to our lives, but it should also help us become the best possible version of ourselves.

Only a great love can raise us to greatness.

And that’s the thing about the love of our life—it may not end up being who we thought it was, and it may still not come without challenges, but there is just something about it that makes us want to be better.

It’s a love that inspires us, and shows us that perhaps we aren’t scared at all, and that just maybe we haven’t screwed up as badly as we thought we had.

Because finally we realize that our “great mistake” was really a north star all along, leading us to the love of our life.

“Sometimes the bad things that happen in our lives put us directly on the path to the best things that will ever happen to us.” ~ curiano.com

Author: Kate Rose
Editor: Nicole Cameron
(Source: https://www.elephantjournal.com/2016/11/the-love-of-your-life-only-comes-after-the-mistake-of-your-life/?fbclid=IwAR0KEcBIHZHLfPsOPHLee2h9tZ_oq8isYruQdcDWui5nMmCttiETNT2lQvo)

I can only hope that there is something better out there for me!

Please universe send me something good!

#IBD4U

Pear

I met this guy Pear online, he’s a little bit older than me & not entirely the type I like the look of, but I figured that my type isn’t going that well, so I should branch out. We chat for a bit & I tell him how I’ve been hanging at the beach a lot, he says he lives by the beach & he should bring me down a cheeky cider, we sort of arrange that we’ll catch up on Christmas eve on the beach, but we also don’t set anything in stone.

On the morning of Christmas eve he messages & asks what my plans are for the day, I say that I am in bed but am considering meeting this guy for a cheeky cider at the beach. (I’m trying to be cute here…) He says something like ‘oh have fun’ & that’s it, really? Does he think I’m talking about someone else? Get a sense of humor dude!

I delay writing back because I think he doesn’t get me & so I search for something else to do because I am so alone & thinking heavily about Noodle, so I think fuck it. I message back Pear & ask him when he’s free, he says he’s free now, so I say give me 30 minutes & I’ll be there. I rub sunscreen on (thinking I’ll get him to do my back, might be kinda fun – everyone says to be tactile on a date) & put on my bikini & shorts, then head out the door. I ask him if he wants a chair & my umbrella & he says yes.

I see him as I’m parking, he is sitting at the table with nothing but a small 6 pack cooler bag, obviously the ciders. I get out my bag, the 2 chairs & the umbrella & walk over to him, he pretends not to see me until I’m basically standing on top of him, he gets up we kiss hello & hug, then we introduce ourselves. Hahaha. I did say I wasn’t sure if we knew each others names. Apparently I’m now even so open to dating people I don’t even know their names. WTF.

We head down to the sand, he doesn’t offer to carry anything that I have, yes I’m carrying my bag, 2 chairs (1 for him) & an umbrella – he has a 6 pack esky. We walk to the sand & set up camp. He at least sets up the umbrella by digging it into the sand. We sit & chat fairly easily. He offers me an apple or pear cider, so I ask for apple, but then I realise he’s brought Somersby ciders which is fucking disgusting, but I bite my tongue & await the disgusting taste. After I ask for apple, he says ‘I only brought pear’ ok, dude, why did you offer me apple? He profusely apologises saying he can run home & get one, but I say don’t worry. At least the pear Somersby isn’t as sweet as the apple.

I ask what kind of music he listens too, he says Fresh FM which is what I listen to too, so I put a mix on spotify & we just sit there chatting. The conversation kinda dies off & I end up just sunbaking but get so hot, that I say I’m going in the water. He says he’ll join me & for the first time in my life with someone I took off my singlet & wore just my bikini top & shorts into the water. Eek! I’m getting more confident! We swim for a bit, or basically just float around. I didn’t have a hair tie & didn’t want to get my hair wet because its very curly & will look like a mop. But I get drenched after a few bigger waves get me.

We get out & lay on the beach, he gets himself another drink but doesn’t offer me one. Maybe the whole pear/apple debacle put him off asking me. I lay down in the sun & almost fall asleep since we’re not talking & he’s not trying so I can’t be bothered. I fake that I have to be at a friends at 7:00 pm so I ask what the time is. It’s just after 6:00 pm so I think that works well. I don’t know how else to leave. I start getting dressed & pack up my stuff, he at least carries his chair back to the car for me (I’m not sure why that bothers me, I mean I can carry it all, but that’s not the point! I want a gentleman.)

We hug & kiss on the cheek goodbye but I don’t say anything about catching up again, I’m not sure I am keen anyway. I thought about Noodle a lot (I can’t believe how much I am thinking about him – he did the unforgivable to me.) & I almost fell asleep o the beach, I mean, that can’t be a good sign.Pear bleed heal the hurt.pngIt’s a 6 minute drive from the beach to my house, & I walk in the door to a message from him saying that he’s sorry he didn’t bring apple cider & that if there’s a next time he’ll bring apple & not to hate him. I don’t reply. I get a merry Christmas on Christmas day too, I don’t reply. I get another message the next day, I don’t know what to say. I always hated men playing the “chemistry” card with me, but since I have experienced that crazy crackling chemistry with someone, I don’t want anything less. I have been single so long because I won’t settle & now I have another element I won’t settle for. I want passion, fireworks & ‘can’t keep your hands off each other’ love.

I mean, I also didn’t ask him to put cream on my back, does that mean I would prefer to get sunburn than have Pear’s hands on me?

He messages me every day but I ignore for a while, until I’m at the beach with a friend & I tell him to come on down – mainly because I think she will be more suited to him, I tell her this & she tells me to invite him along. It takes him like 5 hours to reply but he responds saying he can’t see my umbrella. I’m like dude, we’re home already! He asks if I’m trying to palm him off to my friend, but gives me his phone number, so I have to be honest, I tell him that I didn’t feel the chemistry, he deletes me…

Another one bites the dust!

#IBD4U

The New List

Telling people about my failed whatever with Noodle is so fucking hard, mainly because hardly anyone knew about it… I couldn’t tell people I fell in love for the first time at 36 with a married man – imagine how much judgement I’d get (though now, through this blog I realise that my situation is not uncommon!) Now that it’s over, it seems easier to tell people…

So one day at the hairdressers, I’m telling her about it & we were just having general conversation, I didn’t go into too many details, when she said that when she was single, she wrote a list of every single thing she wanted in a man – including stupid stuff like not a snorer, she read it everyday & then she got it… She said she put it out in the universe what she wanted & for the most part, the guy she’s engaged too is basically the guy on her list – except I think he snores! Hahaha. She said she read it every day putting it out there in the universe & she got it, so I should try it.

New list healing.png

I wrote a list myself. I read it a few times then tucked it in a draw & forgot about it until my next hair appointment when she reminded me about it. I thought maybe sharing the list with you now might help the universe send me the right guy.

  • SINGLE!!!!
  • My Best Friend
  • Good looking to me – brown or blonde hair, tall, nice body & teeth, smells good & good dresser
  • Funny
  • Living a healthy lifestyle
  • Gym enthusiast but not a muscle man
  • Good job that pays well
  • Good car
  • Not a snorer
  • Has kids already or doesn’t want them
  • Kinky, mostly a Dom but sometimes a switch
  • Motivated
  • Mature, not a party animal but likes to go out
  • Adores me, loves me & wants me
  • Supportive of me & my career
  • Chemistry & Passion with me
  • Open & honest communication
  • Mutual Trust
  • Mid 30’s
  • Family orientated
  • Traveller
  • Loyal & Respectful
  • Thoughtful
  • Affectionate but not over the top
  • Sleeps with the ceiling fan on every night
  • Tidy & likes to do stuff around the house
  • Tattooed
  • Not too into sports/video games
  • Wants to marry me

Fuck this is really personal thing for me to share! But in the interest of honesty, I want to share this with the universe & you all. I hear it works. Hahaha. So send him my way universe!

I have bolded the absolute must haves for me, but again, at this point remembering the previous Checklist blog post, I have changed a lot & I am not just willing to settle for someone that likes me.

I want to look for that insane love again. A love that changes you. However I’m not 100% sure there will every be that type of love again for me. I mean do we get unlimited chances at love?

#IBD4U

Cowboy

Noodle hated Cowboy, he was banned from every group Noodle was in & that he was admin in because of some rivalry, I’m not sure what it was – I don’t understand men. (Clearly) I do know very well that Noodle was jealous of any guy that talked to me or showed interest in me, any guy who asked to private message me, or any guy that flirted with me in the group. Noodle would come in & basically piss around me marking his territory but this was next level. I got along quite well with Cowboy in the beginning but he was a bit of a dick towards then end just before he was banned from everything. I hated Cowboy just because he made Noodle so jealous & then I had to deal with it – Calm him down, stroke Noodle’s ego for ages to make sure he realised that I only wanted him. I hadn’t fucked anyone new in months & had stopped private messaging other men because I knew it upset Noodle. I know Noodle has his partner that he goes home to every night & is fucking on a weekly basis, but I hated that I had fucked Orbit & kissed T-bone when I thought I was this loyal person, just like my star sign, a Leo.

Cowboy shattered heart still beating.png

I always got along with Cowboy, I didn’t think he was that bad, in fact before I even met Noodle in person, I was in Port Pirie for work & was supposed to meet Cowboy for a drink, however he never messaged me & I was chatting to other men at the time so I didn’t bother since he lived out that way, so he wasn’t going to be anything anyway. Also I knew that Noodle would be back online soon & I would miss chatting to him if I was out with Cowboy. What a fucking idiot, I am.

I spent the following weeks after it ended with Noodle chatting to everyone on the chat app, I tried not to talk about him, but everyone knew we were together now – after his outburst, so I always ended up talking about him to people on the chat app. Mainly about how shit I feel for things he’s said, I actually spend more time defending him & justifying why he did what he did. I mean I still justify it… I can’t help it. Probably because I am still stupidly in love with him & had hopes that he will come back to me when things did go to shit with his partner.

Cowboy begs me for Noodle’s new user name on the chat app & his partners username so he could send a screenshot of Noodle telling the group that he used to fuck the shit out of me. Wow that would be such an easy way to get what I want! Or would it? It wouldn’t come from me at all, she would get a copy of a screenshot of the chat, a group I wasn’t in & it would have nothing to do with me. My hands would be clean… Or would they? I mean I would have to pass on the info I know to Cowboy, which could also be screenshotted & used against me. It’s not a good idea!

I do come so close to telling Cowboy, so many times. Especially when Noodle is boasting about their sex life to me. But my conscience always stops me. I could easily ruin things for both of everyone here. Including me…! But again, I’m not like that… Fuck sometimes I wish I was, because you know what, I doubt that his partner wouldn’t hesitate to throw me under the bus if she could… That would be so easy, because I would be out of the equation, I guess. But it wouldn’t get me what I want – or would only get me what I want for a short time till Noodle found out I took part in the deception. I mean what do I want? Do I really want Noodle at this point? He’s a liar, I know that, he’s hurt me worse than I thought anyone could hurt me… He’s treated me with disrespect, someone that I thought I could trust & loved me. Lets face it, she is never going to let Noodle go & he’s not strong enough to walk away, so I just have to be the one that walks away, even though it hurts with every single fucking heartbeat.

I’m back in Port Pirie for work, Cowboy says he’s there too, it’s only been a few weeks since Noodle & I ended, I’m dying that we’re not talking at all – he hasn’t replied to my messages on his new chat app account, even tried to get his attention via text message. I tried to contact him & get no response. I’m only meeting Cowboy because I am so hurt & I want to hurt Noodle, if he ever finds out, he will hate me for it. What a stupid fucking reason to meet this guy… FUCK.

I am a little early for the coffee date, so when I pull into the Maccas carpark to meet Cowboy face to face for the first time, I look at every app but with no new notifications, while bored & looking at my phone, I decide to just quickly look at my junk emails, clean them out & I see three, yes three fucking emails from Noodle! FUCK… Why the fuck are they going to my junk mail? I have emailed him before, shouldn’t my email account know who’s junk & who’s someone I email?! Mother fucker.

The first one is in response to why he hasn’t been on his old chat app account & why he’s not replying on his new one to me – ‘Hey wife is poking around chat app, not trying to message you, will chat when I can.’ & then hours later after I text him he says ‘Hey please don’t message my phone thanks, I’ll return your keys next weekend if you want to meet up for lunch, don’t want to lose you as a friend, Noodle.’ & there is a super long one in response to my goodbye email – finally (Which I will discuss in a specific Noodle Post – Yes there are going to be more! -When will I shake this man?). I read them all several times before going in for coffee with Cowboy. I send a quick reply “Sorry, all your emails went to my junk box. I can meet you for lunch this weekend? Was going to just pop into your work & get them…” He doesn’t know that I did pop into his work after the psychic fair, but I was planning to pop in again, it’s doing my head in that he’s got my keys still & I hear cars pull up & I think it’s Noodle. I can’t stop looking out the window. At least once I have my keys back, it’ll finally be over. I wonder if he told her that he had my house keys?

I actually just want to curl up in a ball & cry. Finally he’s going to meet me so I can get my keys back, maybe I can get some answers, maybe I can change his mind & perhaps get him to see my side of the story & be with me? But first I have to meet Cowboy for this coffee then go to work & drive the 3 hours home. My tummy is in knots, I walk into maccas & see Cowboy (as he’s got a cowboy hat on) standing out the front so I walk up to him & say hey, but he’s on the phone. He nods at me then we walk into maccas, we order coffees (me a lactose free hot choc) & sit down at a table.

Cowboy & I talk easily, I find him attractive, he’s pretty short though, like my height & it makes me miss Noodles 6’1 stature. I mean if I wore heels with Cowboy I’d be towering over him. I enjoy the conversation, however it’s mainly about Noodle – I’m not sure why I can’t keep my mouth shut but I can’t, I don’t go into the whole story but I do overshare. Cowboy again begs for their user names on the chat app & do you know what, if it wasn’t for finding those emails from Noodle prior to going into the coffee date, I’m not sure I would’ve been able to restrain, being Noodle’s just cut me out of his life like that so easily – again, fuck men are so lucky I’m not crazy & that think before I do things!

I was thinking seriously about showing Cowboy Noodle’s new user name, I didn’t want to put it in writing in case Cowboy screenshotted it & saved it for blackmail, so I was toying with the idea of telling him – then I would be completely out of the equation. I’m so glad I didn’t, I mean I’m only human to have these thoughts, but again like I said, it’s never going to get me what I want. Not that I even know what I want at this point! Lets be honest, I say I want Noodle, but what kind of life would we have now?

At the end of the coffee I hug Cowboy goodbye, I feel shit for him because I’ve talked of nothing but Noodle, as if he’s going to want to see me again nor will he probably talk to me again! Lucky that Cowboy lives out here in the middle of nowhere, I don’t need to ever see him again, I guess.

#IBD4U

What The Fuck Is There To Do In Adelaide?

I refuse to believe that there is nothing to do in my little “country” city of Adelaide. With approx 1.3 million people living in this city, I am in disbelief that pretty much all my dates I been on, have been:

  • A drink at a pub
  • A coffee date
  • Dinner & a movie
  • Netflix & chill

I think this is lame as fuck for Adelaide & me. Surely there is more to do, something fun, something exciting that also shows my fun side. Remember my friend telling me to show my fun side way back in the first blog Pilot?!

This blog came about because I dated a guy who’s favourtie thing was playing mini golf – it was even on his profile when we met, so one night I booked us in for a game of mini golf at Holey Moley, where we ended up playing both courses. Because of his reaction about how excited he was to go before we got there & afterwards him telling me how much fun he had, talking about it days later, that we should do more fun stuff, that I started to think, what the fuck is there to do in Adelaide?

When I posed this question to myself, I was spending the next day driving to Port Pirie with a colleague so I said to her that we need to think of “fun dates” in Adelaide. So this list isn’t just complied solely by me, she had a few ideas & was also able to google as I drove but of course the blog is written by me.

Our list included all the usual things listed above, mainly revolving around food, but when I explained it was for an out of towner, who is a fussy eater (no cheese) who’s on a strict diet so doesn’t drink a lot of alcohol, but is adventurous, that we need to come up with fun things, not just dinner or drinks. However we are also restricted to a weeknight date! WOW, this sounds really hard! I wanted fun ideas like the mini golf & so this is what we came up with!052816 (2)

I’ll write a brief explanation for you too – so you can find it in your state if it’s not called the same thing where you are.

  • Holey Moley – Indoor mini golf. (https://www.holeymoley.com.au/)
  • Intensity – Arcade video games, air hockey, car racing simulators etc. (https://intencity.com.au/
  • Bowling – 10 pin bowling in gross shoes.
  • Winery Tasting – Find a winery with food & make a day of it, I love a sunny winters day & some wine tasting. Even do a brewery tour if wine isn’t your thing.
  • Adventure Rooms – Aka Escape rooms, using clues to get out of the locked room. (https://adventurerooms.com.au/)
  • Ice Skating – Find an outdoor rink, usually pop ups in Glenelg or the city.
  • Aquatic Centre – I thought this was weird (mainly cos I was worried about them seeing me in bathers, when my colleague said that she assumes he’s already seen me naked & this is something fun she does with her partner sometimes for a swim, sauna or spa.
  • Sporting Event – Football, motor sport, cricket or tennis. Amateur or professional, just get amongst the atmosphere.
  • Beach House – Used to be Magic Mountain, the waterslides, dodgem cars, mini golf, arcade games. (https://thebeachouse.com.au/)
  • Laser Tag – I did it for the first time a little while ago with work people, so was so much fun, in a group, not sure how it’d go on a date with only 2 of you.
  • Tree Climb – Adelaide has a tree climb which I’ve done with my gym friends, it was so much fun. (https://treeclimb.com.au/)
  • Bounce – Trampoline arena, pretty much a warehouse full of trampolines. (https://www.bounceinc.com.au/)
  • La Sing – A karaoke bar in the city, but probably any would be fun. (http://lasing.com.au/)
  • 8 Ball – I have a pool table in my lounge room, that we all know too well… I have sex on it more than I play pool on it. So, going out to play pool might be a better idea!
  • Trivia Night – Often at pubs, go join in with randoms or make your own team.
  • Mega Adventure – A giant obstacle course, must not be scared of heights. (https://megaadventure.com.au/)
  • Comedy Show – I’ve seen a comedian target a couple on a first date or a couple very early in their relationship, so be careful about where you sit. (https://www.adelaidecomedy.com/)
  • Paint ball – I’ve never played but think this could be fun too, even inflict a bit of pain!
  • Go Cart Racing – Careful with this as guys can get a bit too competitive.
  • Latitude – It has everything, indoor rock climbing, trampolines & am obstacle course thing. (https://latitudeair.com/)
  • Lawn Bowls – I’ve done this is big groups, but I’m sure you can do it in smaller groups too.
  • Concerts – Any concert will do.
  • Mount Lofty Hike – Any hike would be fun, even a beach walk would suffice.
  • Moonlight Cinema – cinema in summer in the park. Take wine & cheese for a fun mosquito bitten night.
  • Kayaking – You can hire kayaks so you don’t need to own them, but it’s something I love, however not been a good idea for a first date!
  • Garden of Unearthly delights – When the fringe is on, it’s an amazing place for food, drinks & a random show.
  • Day trip – Hahndorf, Victor Harbor, Whispering Wall or Gumeracha

So I think we did pretty well with the list. I never want to be a boring girlfriend & I think that this will help that along the way. Some of these things are very adventurous & I guess you might need a relatively higher level of fitness & possibly trust that the guy you’re dating isn’t just going to race ahead & not help you if you get stuck on an obstacle. Hahaha. However this also could be a good way to tell if they’re a keeper or not.

Have you got any other ideas?

#IBD4U

Noodle #32

To celebrate 1500 likes on my FB page https://www.facebook.com/Ivebeendatingforyou/ – here is a bonus Noodle post!

The next morning, post T-bone (I suggest you read that post before reading this! It’s part of this story!) – FUCK! I feel like absolute shit! Not only from a ridiculous hangover that I haven’t had like this in years, in fact the whole time I’ve been seeing Noodle I’ve barely been drinking in case he wants to see me at short notice & I need to drive to see him, which is stupid but fuck I can’t help it. I feel shit from the fact I have kissed another guy – AGAIN! What is wrong with me, why aren’t I the loyal person I thought I was? To be honest, that disturbs me more that kissing or fucking other guys… I am not who I thought I was! I know I am midst affair here, but it’s not my affair, I’m not cheating on anyone & if it weren’t for that stupid agreement, I doubt that Noodle & I would be in this mess! But why do I keep doing this? But why am I like this, is it to test my feelings for Noodle? Is it because I self-sabotage? Am I too scared of being happy? I mean can I be happy with this man? Is that even possible in this situation?

Noodle messages me a good morning message – pretty much before I am waking up out of my drunken stupor, he’s at work asking how the night was. I am in 2 minds about telling him what really happened before someone in the group says something, should I just come clean about the kiss before someone says something or should I just hope to fucking god that no one says anything? I risk it & I just tell him I’m supremely hungover, that I drank too much & came home with Sweetie – not a lie… When he asks me to come see him that day for lunch, I say yes & I think that I will tell him in person – then he won’t get too jealous & I can reassure him how much I do like him & that is isn’t what I want, I can gauge his reaction rather than him just not replying to me after I tell him or him saying “I’ll live” which will make me feel even worse, if we’re together, I can kiss him better & make sure he is ok about it.

I consider private messaging some of the people in the group that were at the drinks thing, to ask them not to say anything, however I think that will draw more attention to it, not only will I have to admit that I’m fucking Noodle but I will have to ask them not to say anything to him & I actually think that it would make me want to say something more if I knew I couldn’t or was asked not to, it’s a bit too suspicious. Plus I know that some of these women are or were after Noodle too, so would they private message him & tell him about the kiss so that he ends it with me? I mean I remember when he got really upset that I didn’t tell him about the afternoon with Shark & Leblek. We weren’t really seeing each other exclusively then like we sort of are now, I guess, so I knew it would upset him so I didn’t tell him. Should I tell him about T-bone? Then if I tell him about this dude, should I tell him about Orbit? Should I just shut my trap & know that this guy is fucking his partner & it’s all part of the deal?! To use Noodle’s catch phrase?!

But I get to his work, I message him that I am there & when I see him walking towards my car, all manly & sexy even if his shirt is too big because he’s lost a lot of weight that I melt, when he gets in the car & he leans over & kisses me hello, I smile & I must have a stupid look on my face because he asks “What?” I reply “Nothing” & we drive off to find a spot. I can’t do it, I can’t tell him, I don’t want to hurt him, it kills me that I might hurt him – I’ve never hurt a guy before that I care about… We’re not exclusive obviously but I don’t want to hurt him… & I know that he will be so jealous & he will think he is not good enough for me. I know how he thinks. It seems so ridiculous to even say this knowing the situation we’re in but he is good enough for me, he is the one I truly see myself with! I don’t want to hurt him, I don’t want him to feel like he’s not good enough. So I decide that it’s best not to tell him & I just pray to god that no one in the group says anything.

I get away with it, phew. Noodle never mentions that he knows about the kiss, but it did take him ages to admit he knew about Shark & Leblek so maybe he’s just saving this to throw back in my face one day? I don’t know… I guess I’ll find out one day… Though weeks later, I am still freaking out every time someone in the group brings up that night – will they mention me kissing a boy? Thankfully, unless he reads my blog, I believe I got away with it. If he was told, I know he would say something eventually, he wouldn’t be able to help himself! He’d use it in some way against me when I get crabby about him fucking his partner… But he never mentions it.

We fuck that afternoon in the back of the car in the backstreets by his work. When I get home I am either feeling guilty or sexy that I send him some naughty pics to remind him how sexy we are together. I guess I do this a lot but he senses that something is up because he mentions that I don’t do that often while he’s at work just after he’s fucked me… SHIT.

Noodle tells me one day that “I’d much prefer you cumming the same time with me” Yeah I agree, I love when that happens & it’s happened a few times now, it kind of scares me a little but it also somehow feels amazing “Hmmmm… Fuck you, that made my clit tingle I tell him that “It’s really hot & probably the most intimate thing I’ve ever done..” He agrees & says that it “Only happens every now & then.” But fuck when it does, it’s like the whole world stops, I look into his eyes while he’s looking into mine & we really connect, like nothing else exists…

Noodle proud.png

The next day it’s Noodle’s birthday, I make sure I am awake early & message him first saying Happy birthday. It’s a Sunday & he’s not working today, so I am not sure when I am going to see him but I want too… He made the effort to see me for my birthday that I want to see him but of course it’ll be up to his schedule & if he goes to the gym tonight. My 2 weeks of annual leave are at an end, so I’m hoping he doesn’t go to the gym too late as I have to get up for work tomorrow, however he starts his annual leave for his brother’s wedding. At 10:00 pm, he messages me to tell me he is going to the gym, I tell him that I want to give him a birthday blowjob & that I am on my way. I know he is happy that I am going to see him today. I’m assuming there has been no sex from his partner. I meet him in the car at the gym, he hasn’t bothered to go inside. I jump straight into the back seat & kiss him as soon as he sits down. I’m rubbing him through his shorts & pulling them down as quickly as I can, he is hard straight away, like he even needs foreplay to make him hard around me?! Hahaha. I suck his cock till he is almost about to cum when he tells me that he wants me to fuck him. I get up & straddle his lap & we both make this noise as I slide his cock inside me, looking into each other’s eyes. I ride his cock till I’m cumming & he then flips me to lay on the back seat to fuck me, when I ask him to fuck my tits (which he loves when I ask him to do that) he wastes no time switching positions, making himself cum all over me. Afterwards, my favourite part, Noodle sits back while I remain laying on the backseat covered in his cum when he see it, he rubs it into my skin… I won’t shower when I get home, sleeping covered in his cum & I’ll remind him in the morning that I am dirty bitch still wearing his cum.

I tell Noodle that I love the way he looks & that I find him really sexy, but for some reason he seems to not believe me, the woman who’s been fucking him weekly for months & chatting to him daily, but when someone else tells him he seems to believe them instantly. Or even if his partner says something to him about how good he looks now. I say “I would’ve thought that it’d mean more coming from me that I think you’re sexy cos I can apparently have anyone I want & I choose you. But maybe I spoil you & tell you too much. I’ll stop” Noodle tells me all the time that I can have anyone I want, I of course don’t believe this nor is it true, otherwise I wouldn’t be in this predicament. Noodle sends me a picture of him flexing his arms in the gym mirror & tells me “No, keep thinking I’m sexy. My arms have gotten bigger hehe. Maybe I think they are sexy now. You were fucking me before I went to the gym tho” He’s right, I was, I remember being the one that was suggesting he go to the gym. “I thought you were pretty sexy before you went to the gym TBH… But you look better now too…” I’m reminded of his first profile picture & how much I liked him when I first even saw his face “Well you were dying to fuck me before… Your more touchy now tho…” Fuck am I? Must control those pesky hands “I wasn’t dying… Get a grip. I’m gonna stop touching you!” We both know this is a lie, but fuck he’s being an arrogant idiot as usual. Hahaha “Nooooo. Makes me feel good about going to the gym… And Sexy…. Ummm considering you were fucking a ton of people & had lots lined up, you were pretty keen” Ok, so Noodle is in this type of mood! “That’s what I mean… It should mean more from me! I don’t have to fuck you!” He doesn’t seem to realise that I choose him “Hmmm but you want to badly all the time. So it does I guess.” Finally he gets it. But then adds “I like the way you didn’t deny anything I just said. Must have been a good fuck for you.” So we’re going to go here… I need to stroke his ego, I know the type of mood he’s in but I’m also in a mood, hating that I constantly have to do this “What’s there to deny? I mean, if I do, you say pfft. & I was fucking others & had potential guys but not as many as you think.” His first reply makes me laugh “Pfft. Miss popular, you had couples lined up, other people on the chat app. All lined up to fuck you. Even arranged meetings that failed for a couple of them. So whatever!” OMG I can’t deal with this. “Yeah…? Well I’m single. Part of the deal” I know that he is going to hate that response “Haha Bitch. But didn’t arrange to meet me or fuck me… Poor me!” OMG, really! “No, I just rearrange my gym, my work, drive to your work, your home, your gym… Poor Noodle!” Fucking hell, we’re doing this are we? “Hehe, opps. Don’t make me feel special or anything!” So I keep going “I bought lingerie specially for them all too! Gave them all a key to my house! Let them fuck any hole or cum anywhere they want.” He tells me that I can reuse the lingerie for other guys & that Max had keys to my house “Max had my spare keys… I had those cut for you… Not that you believe that either!” I am sick of this fucking shit! I was careful not to give him keys someone else had, these were keys for him, I didn’t want him to have my spare keys, I wanted him to have his own keys, I knew he wouldn’t believe I did that, but I did think about how I’d feel if I was given keys other women had… So I got some cut for him, like the loser that I am, knowing he wouldn’t believe me. “Hmmm, really? They look pretty new… Hmmm I’d kiss you right now if I could!”

#IBD4U

Guest Blog: Erotica – For Her

Erotica Thursday’s is back (for today only!) This is a erotica story written by my male friend… I like reading stuff from the men too!

This is a similar fantasy that I’ve enjoyed but have also experienced (Story to come!)

Here’s a link to my erotica scenes… Scene one – Nipple Bells, Scene two – Wake Up Call , Scene Three – His Orgasm & Scene Four – The Wake Up Call , Scene Five – Blindfold, Scene Six – Shower, Scene Seven – Anticipation, Scene Eight – Watching, Scene Nine- Quick Fuck, Scene Ten – Her Surprise & Scene Eleven – Prick.

Enjoy!

For Her

The mood in the house is quite uplifted. I bounce around the living room to my favourite song. The bass from the speakers reverberates from the floor boards. The warmth from the fireplace radiates throughout the room. I pour myself another glass of wine and lay back in the recliner, gazing out the window. I look at the clock. 5pm. A smile appears on my face. A sense of excitement overwhelms me as I see his car pull in to the driveway. My man is home. I take one last quick look in the mirror. I’m wearing his favourite red lace lingerie. Letting him know that I’m in desperate need of hot animal sex. The thought of his hands on me, controlling me, has me ready and eager. I watch him get out of his car. The greasy, dirty, hi-vis outfit encompassing his body, is my favourite sight. His dark sunglasses covering those baby blue eyes. The image of him is something of my dreams.

He retrieves his esky from the boot of his car and walks towards the front door. I take a deep breath to centre myself as I open the door. His smiling face drops to a sly, cheeky grin as he sees me. He stumbles on the front step. I reach for his hand and pull him inside. Without taking my eyes off him, I take his esky from his hands, throwing it on the floor like it doesn’t have feelings and slam the door behind him.

“Don’t worry about your day, or what happened outside that door!” I instruct sensually. “Tonight, I am yours to do with whatever you please, do you understand?”

With that, I push him hard against the door and press my lips to his. I work my tongue into his mouth and melt with the flavour of his tongue that I’ve been craving all day. I wrap my arms around the back of his neck. He reaches down and firmly grabs my ass, lifting me onto his hips. I remove his sunglasses and gaze deep into his eyes. There’s something about them when they look at me. When he looks at me, its like I’m the only girl alive. I know he cares for me deeply. As I do him.

I passionately kiss him as he starts walking away from the door. Pulling away so he can see where he’s walking, he looks at me and says, “Whatever I want, hey?”. I nod childishly, knowing exactly where he’s taking me!

As we reach the doorway to the attic, he kisses me one last time and puts me down.

“Kneel” he commands.

Looking up at him gives me a feeling of being in complete surrender. My master and protector. He reaches above the door frame and retrieves the door key from the hiding spot. He opens the door and instructs me to crawl up the stairs. Knowing this is his favourite part, I crawl up slowly, accentuating my movements. Looking backwards I notice his adoring grin. His eyes fixated on the red lace.

“Whack!”. His hand connects with my right butt cheek, sending delightful tingles of pain through my body. I scurry up the stairs.

“On the cross!” he orders.

I slide my body against the cold, hard, polished St Andrew’s cross, expertly crafted by my masters very own hands. The cold, smooth varnish awakens my skin. The feel on my back is so harsh, but comforting. He straps my hands to the restraints above my head. Running his hands lightly down my body, he grabs my ankles. Spreading my legs, he attaches the straps around my ankles. I cannot move. He walks to the cabinet and retrieves my favourite blindfold. Placing it on me, he presses his lips against mine. His taste electrifies me. Without the sense of sight, I’m more aware of his many other attractive traits. His dirty, oily smell from his work clothes makes me reach out to taste him. He grabs me by the throat and pushes my head back. I moan as he instructs me to be good. I can feel my panties getting wetter as I yearn for him to touch me.

“Bad girls get punished!” he remarks, as he ties a neck tie over my mouth to muffle my sound. Preventing me from trying to taste him.

Suddenly, a sharp pain scorches my breasts. The pressure increases as he tightens the nipple clamps. The pain is intense but pleasing. He tugs on the chain, stretching my already compressed nipples. He pulls further. In my mind I’m waiting for my nipples to tear, but I know that he is in complete control and cautious with his every move. He would never hurt me more than my limits.

He lets go rapidly and my nipples return to my chest. Rebound pain is more intensely pleasurable than the feeling of them being pulled on. My moan is muffled by the necktie. I love being able to scream behind the mask.

He grabs my face and kisses my neck. The polar opposite soft, sensual, contrasting feeling makes me weak at the knees. I love when he creates contrasting sensations!Erotica, for her.pngHe kisses me downwards. Along my neckline. Over my breasts. I’m yearning for him to continue. He complies. He grabs at my waist and kisses me just above my spot. I push my hips into him. The warmth of his tongue gently touches my button. I moan louder as he starts drawing circles around it. Pulling me apart, he pushes his tongue slightly inside and my body collapses slightly into my restraints. He pulls away, back to my clit and runs his fingers around my opening. Pressing ever so slightly on my muscles, he makes me relax around them. Timing my hips with his fingers, I rotate around him. Slowly he pushes his way inside, pressing firmly along my front wall. He pushes his fingers in their full extension. I scream as he presses hard upon my pleasure spot, that he knows all too well where to find. His mastery of his fingers inside my body makes me grind my hips, harder against him. Faster and faster his fingers move against my front wall. The pressure is building, I can feel that familiar feeling is coming. He can sense it too. Increasing in speed and pressure he presses firmly against my spot. My muffled screams get louder and louder behind my necktie gag. The sensations swell throughout my body and the blood rushes to my head. I feel the liquid escape my body. The sound of his fingers, squelching inside me as he slaps them around, in complete control of my body. I collapse further in my restraints as the feeling subsides throughout my body. My head drooped as low as my neck will allow.

He removes my gag and presses his fingers into my mouth. Making me taste myself. I clean his fingers diligently, knowing that it turns him on immensely. I don’t mind my taste either, mixed with the flavour of his hand. He removes my blindfold and I stare at the floor beneath me. My satisfied face stares back at me in the wet polished floorboards. Totally spent and exhausted from the attention that my man just gave me.

As he massages his hands along my legs, I feel the blood return. The sensation of touch appears in my legs once more and I find the strength to stand on my own feet again. The sensations continue as he runs his hands up my torso, over my breasts and to my face. Lifting my head, our eyes meet. His face is awash with content smugness. He kisses me on the lips and returns the blindfold to my face.

The feeling of the rope around my waist is soft and sensual. As he ties my hips to the St Andrews cross, I feel something unexpected is about to happen. I cannot see what he is doing. I feel something spherical being pushed against me. As I feel the rope cinch tight against my body, I realise what he’s done. He’s tied it against me, pushing firmly on me.

“Im going to have a shower, I will be back shortly!” he exclaims.

“Don’t you fucking dare you bastard!” was my desperate reply.

He kissed me on the lips and then I feel him move away. My focus turned to the spherical pressure on my button, knowing that in any second, I may or may not be in severe uncontrollable discomfort until his return.

The feel of the headphones being placed over my ears was distracting enough. My favourite band starts playing. My master knows me well. The intro builds. The singer’s voice screams through my head. I cannot see or hear what my master is doing. I cannot move, restrained to the cross. Almost all my senses have been removed and I am unaware of my surroundings. The song builds toward the bass drop. A gentle kiss on my lips just before it hits, then as it does…..

“Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz”. Trapped in restraints, with no awareness of what’s around me, and a hitachi wand tied firmly against my clitoris while my master leaves to have a shower…….

#IBD4U

 

Guest Blog: Locked Out Of Heaven

Another Guest Blog from a reader of mine. I love these stories… I hope you do too! Breaks up the ongoing stories I share.

I believe this was another bloggers stories, but I don’t have the link of where it is posted!

Bit of a short one, but a good one! Hahaha.

Hope you enjoy anyway.

Locked out of Heaven

I hadn’t been separated very long, and as any newly single woman does, I went through a bit of a wild phase.

My favourite drink went from hot milo to tequila, my clothes from mumsy to classy single lady on the prowl, hooker heels, red lips, and a whole lot of sass.

Now considering I’ve never been a huge drinker I had to learn to manage my drinks and to handle my liquor.

I was out with the girls, frocked up to the nines, a few drinks under my belt when I saw him. We had locked eyes a few times and I gave him that cheeky smile, liquor induced of course.

Bruno Mars Locked out of Heaven came on and I’d made up my mind. I wanted to dance. I wanted to sexy dance. I wanted to sexy dance with him.

So with that extra dutch courage I hopped down from the stool I was on and strutted over to him, lets just call him Mr Hottie. Not only because he was sexy as fuck, his body was rock hard muscle, but when my hands found their way under his shirt he was warm, no, hot, to touch. Argh! Got there way too early. Rewind…

As I swayed my hips over to Mr Hottie, I reached for his hand and asked him to dance expecting him to oblige, however, he chose this point that he decided to play shy and told me he couldn’t dance.

I laughed and told him “there’s no such thing as can’t dance. Dancing is just like sex and I bet you rock in bed”. Yep. Good old dutch courage because this girl would never have said that to a stranger sober.

And with that I led him to the dance floor, stood in front of him with my hands on my hips, rolled my hips and then raised my hands in the air and with one I slowly sexily ran one hand down the inside of my still raise arm, down my throat, between my breasts to my hip, then lifted my hand and bit my finger and purred to him “tell me you can’t dance again”, before hooking my finger into the keeper of his jeans above his crotch and pulled him toward me.

Girl was on fire!

I placed my hands on each of his hips and stood with one of his legs between my two. I whispered in his ear and gave him the sultriest look I could manage, “show me how you can dance, just pretend you are having sex”.

And as the music blared in the club we proceeded to sexy dance to the sound of Bruno Mars. Hips rolling, hands wandering, neck kissing, ear sucking, heart rates increasing.

And by the end of the song, Mr Hottie showed me he definitely could dance, and later on that evening he showed me that those dance moves were incredibly arousing, orgasm building, sexy as fuck sex moves as well.

And that ladies is my memory of Locked out of Heaven, Mr Hottie and the night I got crazy on tequila and had the confidence to approach the hottest guy in the club.

Thanks dutch courage. Love you!052816 (3).png

#IBD4U

Sexual Harrassment

There comes a time in everybody’s working life (sadly – because this type of shit shouldn’t ever happen to anyone) when you are sexually harassed in the line of your work. Now, I never thought it would happen to me or so subtly that I would actually be flattered by it & not offended… I mean how does that even happpen… But when I told Noodle about it, not only did he get supremely jealous, he was also the one that pointed out that I had just sexually harassed. OMG! As if I needed someone to point that out to me! Who have I become…? Is this what online dating has done to me? After all the unsolicited cock shots – which is the equivalent of someone flashing you in a park, perhaps in a trench coat & all sexual innuendos from men online over the last 12 years, am I so desensitised that I am ok with a guy sexually harassing me via text at work, on my work phone? Why didn’t I realise that this guy was actually being a creep to me!? I guess I am lucky he didn’t try to find me in Facebook or some other stalker method. At least he used the only way he had to contact me.

So to give you some background… In my job I work with lots of diverse people, I often am contacting people via text, emails calls & faxes (yes people sill use faxes!). I work closely with a guy, who is about my age & from New Zealand. He literally has the best eyes in the world – they are bright blue piercing eyes & he is quite attractive, I won’t deny that, but he is such a bogan but he is a nice guy who means well. He also looks you directly in the eye when he talks, it’s hard to look away but it can be unsettling for me! We also have some banter about Dave Hughes (an Aussie comedian) & how he says “Good on you” all the time… This guy & I say it all the time & laugh, it’s kind of flirty, I’ll give him that, I do engage in it… I probably would consider dating him too, if things were different for both of us, like if we’re both single & we met in a pub or online…

I actually see this group of people every month for meetings & he’s never text me ever, in the 3 or 4 years that we’ve been working together. So when I start getting texts from him, I do wonder why he’s messaging me, I mean he’s never replied to a text I’ve sent him, ever. It is a bit weird, I mean I am pretty sure that he still has a Nokia 5110 that you have to click the number buttons 2-3 times to get a letter. Which probably explains his terrible spelling…

This is the exact text exchange with a few minor changes to protect our identities (obviously). His messages are in blue & mine in black.

Not my usual style to post exact exchanges like this, but I think it’s part of weird things that happen to me as a single woman, that never seems to happen to anyone else. Hahaha.

Hi hows arvo bn goin?. tht guy is prety good ae we shud try get him to come to all our meetings frm now on

Yeah & from what the other guy was saying he probably should be in them. so when we look at the agenda for the meetings, we can work out who should be there.

Yeah i think he shud be nd yes tht definitly a good idea as he is a lot more clearer thn the othr guy is lol..nd jst of th subject n no ofence whn i say this n its not bad but i cnt look at u in th same way anymore lol

I agree. I’ll dig out the agenda for next months meeting.

I hope I haven’t done anything to cause that.

Tht sounds like a plan to me…haha na u hvnt its mre embaressing thn anything lol

I hope I didn’t embarrass you by anything I did.

No its nothing uve done il tel u bt im already gtn bit embarest lol

Nd u cnt hate me fr teln u either lol bt lets jst say tht i had a very sexual dream about u im nt goin into details bt ws a good dream lol so whn i saw u today i instantly felt a lil embarest haha n cudnt look at u in same way lol

Thanks for telling me.
I hope this doesn’t affect us working together.

No probs i think lol ,but na its defnitly nt gona effect us wrking togethr,unles its changed ure view n thoughts of me n think im sum creep sicko lol?.

No, I don’t think you’re a creep. It’s all good.

Thts good thn,thnx..wht u upto fr rest of ure nite gt much planed?

No ofence but if things were diferent i wud ask n see if u wanted to out fr a drink ae.bt anyway u hve a goodnite

Just off to the gym, if I ever leave the office. No offence taken. Things are as they are. Have a good one.

Oh wow u stil at th ofice wrking?,good on you lol.good tht ure not ofended .thn mby one day il ask u fr a drink thn anyway lol.will do u to hve a good one.

Sexual Harrassment.png
Reading back on this, years later, I actually can’t believe that I wrote back “Thanks for telling me” I mean WTF?! WHO AM I? & as if I said that he wasn’t a creep! This is seriously creep level… It’s one thing to have a dream about someone, but you don’t need to fucking tell them about it… Is this like Stockholm syndrome? Not wanting him to get into trouble for sending me these texts?

I talked to 2 of my bosses about it, showing them to text exchange & asking what I should do. They both just sort of laughed when they read it & said I did the right thing, but seriously, why wasn’t something done about this? Why didn’t I do something about this? What should I have done about this…?

After this, I kept working at the site but we never spoke of it again… I kind of forgot about it, pushing it to the back of my mind because I still had to be professional & I was never going to act on it. He text me a few times after that, to see how I was, but that was about it. Thankfully. I get moved off this site & don’t ever see him again, which I am thankful for. But who knows what the future holds!

He has a partner, I have a Noodle – who got jealous about this when I showed him… Not that Noodle ever has a reason to be jealous with me, but he seems to get jealous a lot!

But really… This is just one of those weird things that always seem to happen to me!

#IBD4U

Profile Picture

One very odd thing about online dating is what people think is appropriate for their online dating profile pictures. I know I’ve talked about online profiles before but this blog will be profile picture specific… (When I started writing this post, I didn’t think I’d have much to say, but boy was I wrong!)

As I’ve said before this is your time to shine, your time to show women or men what you look like, who you are via pictures & if they want to swipe on you or not. Why waste this opportunity with a shit picture?!

However, in my experience, on the many occasions I have been online dating, I am still perplexed about men’s choices of profile pictures, I don’t look at women’s profiles so I can’t comment – but I’m sure there is a female equivalent to this blog, things men hate… It any guy wants to send me their thoughts, please do! I’m happy to hear if I am also doing something wrong!

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So, I want to ask. Why do men put up weird photos? Unflattering photos or really unsexy photos?! The most common unsexy one for me is them on a boat, looking proud as punch with a giant fish, that they’ve clearly just caught… Let me tell you something guys, there is nothing, absolutely nothing, sexy about a fish!!! They’re slimey, they’re cold & wet & do you know what? They aren’t cuddly or cute… They’re so unattractive, I just don’t get what message you’re trying to send a chick? Is it a that you’re a mans man? Or that you’re a hunter & gatherer? You will provide for her? I just think, ewww, every time I see one, especially if there is blood on the poor fish! I’d say probably one in every ten profiles contain a fishing charter photo of some sort.

My biggest pet hate for online profiles pictures is a picture with a kid… Especially when they note in their profile bio that the kid is not theirs… WHY! I hate it because I don’t think anyone should put kids on an online dating site… Its weird. So many internet creeps out there, do we really need to expose kids to that when they can’t consent to their picture being shared? Secondly, as someone who doesn’t want kids of my own, I don’t like to see someone that I’m attracted too, with a kid who’s not theirs, because it tells me that they want them, regardless of what they say. However, I do prefer a man with children, so I do want to know that they have kids, but I don’t need to see a picture of you with them to know that you’re a good dad… But seriously, if its not your kid, did you get permission from the parents to post it? Would they be ok with it being on a dating site for you to attract women? Also if you say you’re not looking for a relationship, could you put up a more contradictory photo?! It’s just plain weird, so stop it.

The blurry photo… What is that all about? Why post a blurry photo or even one where you can barely see your face because it’s such bad quality – this happens ALOT… Its 2019, take another selfie, delete that one & start over – did you know, it costs nothing to do that?? Same as the half face picture… It still costs nothing to take a picture of your whole face… Unless you are the phantom of the opera, show me your whole face!

Oooh, sunnies pictures! Fuck guys can look really hot in sunnies & then you look at their next picture & think fuck you were hot till you took them off! It’s not their fault, I get it… Maybe I look better with my sunnies on? Perhaps not though, because I do get lots of comments on my eyes… I’m also a bit like this with hats because I prefer hair so usually when they have all pictures with a hat on, they’re bald. Not much you can do about sunnies & hats but it makes a difference.

So the ol group photo, especially as their first picture, I look at the hottest one in the group hoping that it’ll be you & I’m devastated when its not. I find myself wishing you were the hot one, then I toy with the idea of swiping to get to know you so I can date your hotter friend! (hahaha not really, but what a great blog post that would make!) If you want to post a group shot, to show your fun side, make sure it’s not your first picture. Or all of your pictures – why do men post every single picture of him in a group?

This also follows on with drunk pictures or nightclub pictures… I don’t want to see that you’re a party animal. I am happy for you to go out, I also like to go out but if every picture was taken by a nightclub photographer, then you’re probably not going to be putting in any effort to be with me, even if we are just casual…

What about a photo with another chick? I don’t care if it’s your sister or just a friend, if I think she’s hotter than me, I definitely won’t be liking your profile because I will automatically assume that I am out of your league… Even if she’s not that hot, I always wonder what the deal is & why your not dating the chick your snuggling – who you’ve deemed worthy of your dating profile but not worth enough to date. It always gives me a weird vibe to be honest, but chicks are constantly in men’s profiles, probably more than fish…!

Selfies! I’m all for selfies, most of my pictures are selfies however, do we really need a flexed muscle in the gym bathroom? Or a dirty mirror selfie? (yes I look at the marks on the mirror!) Or a urinal in the background? Lets also not forget the ‘looking down’ selfie – usually in a car, why do men do that?? It gives you a double chin, even if you don’t have one. It’s not a flattering look… & oh dear God, selfies with bloody snapchat filters… Just as men hate them for women, women hate them for men – save them for snapchat not your online dating profile!

What is with pictures of only inanimate objects such as your car, truck, boat or motorbike? You’re not even in the picture! What is with that?! I don’t care what you drive to be honest, even if you’re standing next to it… It just sends the message that I will be always number 2 in your life behind your pride & joy. This goes the same with holiday pictures that you’re not in, I like to see holiday pictures with you in it, or that could be anyone’s picture. Same with a sunset, you’d be surprised how many sunset pictures there are.

I’m not a smoker & never have been, so nothing makes me click the no button faster than a cigarette picture… Fine for you to say you’re a smoker in your bio, most sites ask that now & I do prefer to know this fact prior to dating you, it’s not a deal breaker for me so I’m not opposed smokers but do I really need to see you with a fag hanging out your mouth, usually looking drunk as fuck or blowing smoke rings? Nope!

Memes… Why oh why do men post memes! It’s a online dating profile not bloody Instagram…! Most of the them are offensive & I am pretty open minded, so the fact I find them weird to post, I wonder what other women think. We want to see your face, not how good your google skills are at finding lame dad jokes.

Pets, ok I’ll let them off for having their pet up in their profile, however, if it’s just your pet & you’re not in it, I’m probably going to like your animal more than you, so probably best you just put your face up!

The “I looked so good in 2009, so I’ll put that picture up” photo… WHY? You do realise it’s a dating site & when you meet the person & you don’t look like your picture, they’re probably not going to be interested anymore… How dare you waste my time like that! Note to everyone, use recent pictures!

Only having one picture up irks me the most. Especially when it’s just one of the ones listed above… Because after all these guys I’ve already talked about above, they take off their sunnies or have a clear photo & they aren’t attractive to you, but you’ve only got one photo to go by, so when you meet they look nothing like you’ve seen, it makes the date awkward, unless they’re hotter, which lets face it, they generally aren’t… So please put up several clear photos & be confident in how you look!

Now let’s face it, I’ve swiped & matched with all of these guys over the years, I’m not saying I ignore them & you shouldn’t either… But I’m hoping this blog post will help educate those online dating to actually sell themselves, not their friends or bike or someone’s kid or fish… Hahaha…

#IBD4U

Guest Blog: The Writer

Another Guest Blog from a reader of mine. She’s written some stories for us before, this is another story she has for us…!

This is similar to some stories for me, I feel like I am not alone & am thankful that you share your stories with me & allow me to share them!

I love that you’re all involved in my crazy dating life & want to share your similar stories…!

Bit of a short one today, but I hope you enjoy anyway!

The Writer

So, I had been using a kink dating app, testing it out and it linked to my FetLife profile. After I deleted the app I got a message from a man on FetLife explaining that he’d followed me from the app and he wanted to chat with me, if I wanted too. Now, that maybe sounds a little creepy but he writes beautifully and I’m interested in having a chat. I’ll start by saying he’s not my normal type, he’s older by quite a bit and he lives interstate, he’s also in an open marriage. I normally don’t invest my time in people that will be hard to meet up with or married men, even open marriage men. But anyway… I do and I’ll call him The Writer.
We chat on FetLife for a bit and then we move to another chat app. I’m loving the conversations we are having, they’re intellectual, sexy, emotive, curious and we talk about everything, even mundane day to day stuff. I like him. He loops me into a group chat with his wife after a bit, she wants to know who I am as she’s been hearing so much about me. She’s lovely but a little aloof. She’s happy for me to be chatting with her husband, she’s got her own partners outside their relationship that she spends time with and is happy with the arrangement.
After a few months of intense chatting we’re starting to make plans to meet. While this has been going on I’ve met someone locally that I’ve started a relationship with, I’ve been open with him about The Writer and the relationship we have and local boy is onboard for me to meet up with him…until it gets too real and then he wants to tap out and wants me to cease contact.
I really like local boy and want to respect his boundaries and want to give our relationship a reasonable chance of making it. So, sadly I chat with The Writer and tell him where I’m at, he’s sad but understands. We only occasionally message each other to say hi, happy birthday etc… No sexy chats at all.

Guest blog the writer spouse or murdered.png
Fast forward about a year and my relationship with local boy has gone wonky and we break up. Not long after The Writer contacts me to say hi and we have a bit of a chat about what’s been going on. We chat a bit more over a few weeks and we decide that we’re going to meet, I book some cheap flights and we spend a few days picking an air bnb to stay in. He’s going to come and meet me in Melbourne and we’re going to talk and hug and cry and laugh and maybe have some kinky sexy fun.
Finally the day comes to fly out to meet him, he meets me at the airport and it’s lovely, like meeting an old friend. We check in and head out for an afternoon of exploring the city. Afterwards we head back to the bnb, I nap and when I wake up we make love, it’s tender and heartfelt and nice.
The next day he wakes me up, kisses me and then blindfolds me, he’s touching and licking and playing. My wrists get bound and then my thighs, he walks me carefully down some stairs and sits me on a swing in the lounge. My ass is hanging off the back of the swing, he ties me up harder and ties me to the swing, I’m tied up like a mummy. My senses are heightened and I’m really turned on. He pulls out a flogger and starts flogging my ass, it feels amazing, pleasurable pain. I’m still blindfolded. He stops flogging and I find a hard cock in my mouth he gently fucks my mouth for a bit before getting out a small whip and teasing me and whipping me. He’s playing and teasing. He then fucks me from behind. I’m suspended, tied and blindfolded, I can’t do anything but ride it and it’s amazing. We finish and he lays me on a cowhide rug on the floor and unties me, my body is tingling and buzzing with the release of the ropes and I can feel the sunlight that’s streaming through the windows caressing my skin. He takes my blindfold off and I see the play scene around me and I want to do it all again.
But we don’t and that’s another story.
I leave the next day, The Writer and I still chat, I’m still swooned by his amazing way with words that paint a vivid picture and hit you in the emotions. It’s an odd, endearing relationship we have. I’m glad we have it.

#IBD4U

Guest Blog: Erotica – Alarms

So with my fiction erotica scenes posted, I have found out that some of you also like to write erotica fantasies.

I am so thankful that you share them with me & allow me to post them…

This was written by a friend who is a male, thank you for allowing me to share…

Enjoy!

Alarms

You walk swiftly past me and your fragrance captures my nose. I grab at your wrist, but you pull away playfully.

“You’re not getting away that easy!” I mutter.

A cheeky grin forms on your face as you turn to face me. Your hair flings over your shoulder as you lower your head. Your eyes look up at me with a “come get me bitch” gaze. Taking a step forward, my hands grasps your chin firmly, forcing you backwards against the wall. Nose to nose, I feel your breath on my face. Rapid and warm. Turning your face to the side, I expose your neck. Gently pressing my lips against your skin, causing the smallest of moans to escape your throat. Your hands slide up my stomach and come to rest on my chest. You press your left leg against mine, and slowly raise your thigh up the inside of mine. My free hand jolts downwards, stopping your leg before it reaches the top. I let go of your chin and slide my hand across your cheek, and reach for your ponytail. Grasping it firmly, I pull it down and out. Spinning your body, you moan louder as your hands slap the wall to cease your turn. I press my body hard against yours. Your knees bend, your legs feel weak. You can tell I want you. I can tell you’re mine.

As I let go of your ponytail, I run my hand down over your shoulder. With my body still holding you firmly against the wall, my hand slides down to grab yours. I take your other hand in mine also. In one smooth, swift motion, your arms find themselves above your head, left over right against the wall. My right hand lets go and softly runs down your right arm. The feel of you under my fingers is mesmerising. Your body shivers as my fingers gently caress your sides, down toward your waist. My hand firmly grabs the side of your pelvis, pulling your hips backwards into me. Keeping a firm grasp on your hip, my left hand replicates the right’s actions…

A small kiss to your right earlobe as my fingers make their way underneath your hoodie, to your warm soft skin. I slide my palms up your naked back to your shoulders. Excited to discover the lack of bra strapping. Continuing my hands up your arms, I remove your jumper over your head. You gasp for air as I lean into you, pressing your bare chest against the cold wall.

Erotica Alarms eyes sex
I run my hands back down your torso, stopping at your hips. Sliding both my pinky fingers inside your tracksuit pants, my hands follow your pelvis around to your front, palms spread wide on your abdomen. They slide down into the crease at the top of your thighs. I pull you back into me. My fingers trace down the fold to your soft skin. Touching the outside I press my fingers together and apply a light pressure. Your button is compressed by your outer skin, sending pulses through your body. Circular motions from my hands seem to soften your muscles. Your pelvis thrusts with my hands. I can feel the warmth radiate from you. Using my feet to widen yours, my fingers push too far and your wetness transfers to them. Gently massaging your outers, your breathing becomes heavier. I slide my hands further in around your legs, and pull up with a firm presence. Thumbs pressing directly on your button now, my index fingers open your lips. The warmth is now overwhelming. I slide the tips of my middle fingers into you, pulling you open further. You moan deeper as I tip your pelvis backwards, and press myself into you.

“Take me” you moan!

“Beep beep beep beep” sounds your alarm.

“SMASH!” goes the alarm through the window!

#IBD4U

Foodland

Back when I was online dating, a few years ago, it was only a matter of time before I start chatting to someone who looks so familiar (with my recent ‘We’ve fucked before’ episode – I am weary of people who look familiar, scared of who they might be) I think shit, did I sleep with this guy, is that where I know him from? You just never know where it could be from & it’s unsettling. Was it just someone I worked with or someone who was a customer or did I actually fuck them at some point?

We talk for a week or so talking about going out for a fancy dinner to a nice restaurant but we end up agreeing that we are not fancy restaurant people & settle for fish & chips on the beach but I tell him that I’d prefer chico rolls & chips on the beach which he says “Now you’re talking” but we don’t lock in a time as I’m away for work.

I finally decide to ask him where I might know him from, he says he agrees that I look familiar & so I try a process of elimination of places I’ve worked because he could’ve been a customer or maybe someone that worked with me & then it hits me, Foodland! I used to work at foodland (a supermarket chain in Adelaide) in the service deli from when I was in school till just before things ended with Boyfriend. He says yeah he worked there & so I ask which store did he work at & it turns out he worked at the same one that I had worked at. He mentioned the store manager (who was part of the reason of why I quit…) & we realised that we worked at the same Foodland at the same time. However at that time I was with Boyfriend & we just chatted as we passed each other, but nothing of real consequence.

I ask him if the fact we worked together makes him want to meet me more or less – I am unsure but he says more, however that would’ve been his in to ask me out, but he doesn’t take it. I do something that I never do, I ask him a few days later what he’s up to & he says ‘I’m thinking about you, is that cool?’ I mean sure dude, that is cool! It’s so sweet, but if that were really true, wouldn’t he have messaged me? Not the other way around?

Despite this, I feel myself getting attached to the chats with this guy (What is wrong with me?!) & we haven’t even met & he’s not really what I’d be normally attracted too, but I’m trying to take my friends advice & go out with different people. Clearly the people I am attracted to aren’t working out for me, so I’ll go out with people I find attractive but not entirely 100% my type & see what happens. Try new things! Yes this is what I should be doing, I will see what happens with this guy! I really want someone to make me laugh & I think this guy might be able to do that.

Funny thing happens, well really, this is my life, so it’s not unexpected, nor should I be surprised either or is it really all that funny, but I stop hearing from him… He knows I have come back from my work trip, I assumed that we were talking about catching up that coming weekend, yet I don’t hear from him at all, until the end of the weekend & I say that I’ve been out twice that weekend (which is so unlike me) but he says ‘Hagg’ I think he’s trying to make a joke, so I just brush over it but I don’t hear from him much again.

Foodland, love , sex , Past.png

He kinda disappears, he messages me a few times but I don’t pursue him after the Hagg comment, so it kinda just ends, I don’t go online much when he is on there so he doesn’t message me.

I honestly don’t know what happens in these situations, I really don’t! If anyone can enlighten me, I’ll be happy to hear your theories…. When a guy just stops messaging & just ghosts you, what happens? I used to pretend that they died, because lets face it I can’t have that many men not interested in me & dating someone else…

#IBD4U

Italian

Many years ago in my early twenties, way before I was ever with Boyfriend, I used to go out with a group if people that I used to work with at Foodland. Italian used to be best friends with one of my good friends so he was always around, coming out with us, which was cool because he was cool… One night, he & I worked out that we actually went to the same primary school & knew each other from there too as well as work. This is Adelaide for you, everyone knows everyone. I’m actually surprised that so many people get away with cheating! Hahaha. But anyway…

Nothing ever happened with Italian because I ended up with boyfriend & they were good mates too being that they worked together. We kinda lose contact a few years while I am playing house & living with boyfriend – boyfriend & I didn’t go out as much when we bought the house but then when we broke up, I started going out with the friends again & Italian was always around again because he is friends with my good friend.

I’d just moved back into my parents house for a while while I rent out the house I own & save money to go to Canada to live for a while. Italian lives around the corner in the same suburb so we swap numbers, messaging every now & then. He seemed to be available to pick me up from parties when I’m too drunk & then he takes me out for long drives when neither of us have anything to do. (This is obviously before petrol cost more than a kidney transplant per litre)

We kiss many many times over a few months of this routine of him picking me up, us chatting & driving then going parking. One night when he pulls up, switches off the car we are kissing with heavy petting, he then pushes my head down to suck his cock (that was a pet hate back then, I always hated when they pushed your head down to suck them, like I always preferred to do it because I wanted to, not because they pushed me down there!) We’re sitting in the dark & I’m sucking his cock, I remember asking him if he’s going to cum, he says no, so I stop. But after all this action with him we never go out on a date, like dinner & a movie or even just drinks, just the 2 of us. When we go out with friends – which was most weekends, we’d always end up in the taxi together because we live so close to each other, yet we never actually sleep together – that could be because we’re both living with our parents at that time, we somehow just become friends who kiss once in a while & share cabs… If that’s a thing!

One night while I am house sitting my friend’s house, he’s texting me as we usually did & I invite him over letting him know that I am in bed already & in my PJ’s watching TV. He says that’s ok & he comes over. I figure that this is the night that we will finally have sex. He comes over, we kiss for a while, a long while before he takes off my top, he pushes my head down to give him a blow job but then he stops everything. He hangs around for a few minutes but then leaves. I sit there putting my top back on, feeling like the worlds biggest idiot… What the fuck just happened here & what the hell was I thinking?

He texts me later that night to say sorry that he left but his cousin went missing & his head isn’t in the right place… Rightio, at least is wasn’t me?! I don’t know if I buy his story especially since it’s about the last time we ever really see each other… He stops coming out & we lose contact again. I hear that he’s married now & here I am like 10+ years later still single & struggling to get guys to go on a second date with me!! Then the ones I do get to go on a second date with me, decide they don’t like me anyway or I am so bored on the date that I never want to see them again, yet stupidly I always give them a second, third & fourth chance.

itallian

Am I so scared of being alone that I am that willing to just let guys walk all over me all the time?

#IBD4U

Erotica: Scene Twelve – Payback

Lucky last….!

This is the last instalment of the erotica series written by me. Then I’m back to only posting on Tuesdays, Fridays & Sundays!

I hope that you have enjoyed this series! It’s been interesting sharing it with you & you should be starting to see why it was relevant to my blog but not necessary to the story!

Here’s a link to the other scenes… Scene one – Nipple Bells, Scene two – Wake Up Call , Scene Three – His Orgasm & Scene Four – The Wake Up Call , Scene Five – Blindfold, Scene Six – Shower, Scene Seven – Anticipation, Scene Eight – Watching, Scene Nine- Quick Fuck, Scene Ten – Her Surprise & Scene Eleven – Prick.

Scene Twelve – Payback

I’m laying on the bed face down, frustrated as a teenage boy when I hear the shower turn off.
I lay still, wondering if he’ll come make me cum.
He doesn’t.
I can’t even hear where he has gone.
I don’t move.
I don’t hear him at all so I jump when he says sternly
“Stand up” I awkwardly get up, trying to be fast but stumble, his hand grips my arm tightly to help me.
The look in his blue eyes is so dark, that I open my mouth to apologise but he stops me before I can with a finger over my mouth.
He picks up his tie that’s on the bed, I put out my wrists ready for him to tie them but he looks at me with a look that I know I am in for a night to remember…
He chuckles in front of me as he sees me with my wrists together, waiting for him to wrap the tie around.
He holds the tie up in front of my face.
We lock eyes & he’s looking sinister as I have a look of despair.
He is not going to go easy on me tonight.
He gives me one last grin as he wraps the tie around my eyes.
Everything is dark.
He ties it around the back & brings the end to the front to tie tightly in a knot over my eyes.
It’s almost painful.
He pushes something against my mouth, it forces me to open it & he ties the ball gag around my head.
He knows I am cautious of gags, so this is a real punishment for calling him a Prick.
He could spank me as punishment, but he knows I like it.
Hs pulls my arm, I stumble forward.
He guides me, but I don’t know to where.
When he stops me, I am disorientated, but his hand grabs my ankle & pulls it to the side.
He attaches a velcro strap to it.
He moves to the other ankle, moving it so I am spread open.
He is going to make me stand.
He runs the tip of his fingers up my legs, over my pussy quickly to make me jolt backwards & my ass hits something.
he grabs my wrist & puts it above my head, attaching a velcro strap to it too, then doing the same to my other wrist, that’s when I realise I am tied to the door.

Scene twelve prick sex orgasm.png

I am tied to the door, exposed, spread open, senses heightened from being so turned on, waiting, wanting.
I feel like I am there for a long time, before I feel him in front of me again.
Something sharp touches my hand, my fingers curl.
As it runs down my arm, I realise he has a wartenberg pinwheel.
I try to pull away as he glides it down my arm to my collar bone & down across my nipple.
I try to cry out, it feels so amazing, but the gag just gets in my way.
He keeps running it across my nipples, from side to side.
I pull on the restraints & my knees keep giving way, but it doesn’t help.
I am stuck at his mercy.
His hand strokes my inner thighs, if I could talk I’d beg him to touch me.
I thrust my hips as much as I can to let him know what I want.
His hand teasing me with the pinwheel pulls my ponytail so my ear is brushing his lips
“You… will… not… cum”
He can’t see my eyes but I roll them under his tie, moaning against the gag.
I want to call him a prick again.
The pinwheel starts it’s torture again then his fingers slip between my legs & he rubs in small circles.
I’m so turned on from not cumming before that I am close & my breathing changes.
I am concentrating so hard on not cumming but it’s almost impossible.
I keep straining trying to get away from him.
He speeds up his torture, I am so close, I can’t hold it back anymore.
My breathing changes again, ready to cum.
He stops!
I scream into the gag.
He kisses the sweet spot on my neck that drives me crazy, then he starts again, the wheel, his hand.
I get to the point when I am about to cum & he stops, I scream again.
He does this so many times I lose count.
I am begging though the gag, begging him to make me cum.
The next time he stops, he takes the gag off.
I want to babble for him to make me cum, I want to call him a prick again, I want to tell him that I want to do what he wants me to do, but I remain silent.
“Do you have anything to say to me?”
“Yes Sir, I am so sorry, please let me cum. I didn’t mean it before”
“How badly do you want to cum?”
HIs fingers return to my clit, then slip inside me.
“So badly, Sir please make me cum for you”
His fingers speed up, he kisses the spot on my neck that makes me hot.
I cum so hard against his hand that I am lucky my arms are restrained because that is all that is holding me up right now.

#IBD4U

Erotica: Scene Eleven – Prick

This is the second to last erotica… I hope that you’ve been enjoying it. But all good things must come to an end!

I really should turn these into a story!

Here’s a link to the other scenes… Scene one – Nipple Bells, Scene two – Wake Up Call , Scene Three – His Orgasm & Scene Four – The Wake Up Call , Scene Five – Blindfold, Scene Six – Shower, Scene Seven – Anticipation, Scene Eight – Watching, Scene Nine- Quick Fuck & Scene Ten – Her Surprise.

Scene Eleven – Prick

He stands me up & gives me a deep long kiss, pulling on my pony tail to give him a better angle.
He walks around me, again standing behind me, he lightly pushes me so I stumble forward towards the bed.
Without warning he pushes me roughly on the bed face first with my hands still tied behind me back, I yelp, but he has a hand on my neck roughly, almost hurting me & his knees pulling my knees up so my ass is in the air.
Once I’m in the position he wants, he stands up behind me.
I can’t see him, but I feel his presence.
The slap on my ass sounds worse than what it is but I still whimper.
He spanks me then rubs my ass gently, so many times over & over that I lose count.
His gentle hand slides between my open legs & stokes my clit from behind.
I start to slide forward as I start to get more excited.
His spare hand roughly pins my neck hard to the bed to stop me moving.
I moan with every teasing movement of his hand, stroking the full length on my pussy, all the way to my ass hole.
He slips a finger or two inside me, then another on my clit
“Please can I cum sir?”
“You can cum when I say you can cum”
I whimper a almost inaudible ‘Prick’, knowing it he won’t let me cum.
Everything stops
I try to look at what he is doing
“What did you just say?” he growls & I know I am in trouble.
I bite my lip from saying anything else.
“Tell me now” he snaps loudly.
I stay silent.
I get an almighty spank on my ass that really hurts, I jump & cry out ‘owww’
“Tell me what you called me”
I don’t hesitate this time, I whisper ‘Prick’
“I can’t hear you?” He spanks my ass again, its so hard it brings tears to my eyes

scene ten Prick sex orgasm denial
“Prick” I scream.
I hear the smile in his voice
“Awww do you think I am going to let you cum now?”
I cringe & know that I am in trouble.
I hear him spit & feel it on my ass then his cock is rubbing up & down my hole before he slides it slowly in my asshole.
He holds me down with a hand on my neck.
His face close to mine as he starts to pull in & out of me.
“Do you think that was very nice to call me a Prick?” I shake my head as much as I can.
“Answer me”
“No Sir”
“Good Girl” He picks up his speed, I can feel every inch of him filling my ass.
“Should I make you cum?”
“Yes Sir, please” He kisses my ear & neck which is such a turn on for me I almost cum from that & being so full from him.
“You will cum when I tell you too but not this time” he smiles “I’ll show you what a Prick I can be.”
He kneels up, keeping his hand on my neck, my hands stuck behind my back he builds up speed.
He spanks the side of my leg & I cry out.
He is moving so fast inside me, that I feel closer & closer to cumming.
My breath is quick, shallow & loud.
He knows I am close.
“Yes, you’re close baby aren’t you?”
“Yes. please can I cum?”
With another thrust he cums in my ass, leaving me hanging.
His movements slow down, his hand lets my neck go.
As he pulls his cock out of my ass, leaving me frustrated, he spanks my ass hard.
“That’s what happens when you call me a prick”
He unties the tie holding my wrists behind my back & walks off. He’s in the shower before I can straighten my legs.
As the bathroom door shuts, for the first time ever, he shouts
“Do not touch yourself”
I flop flat to the bed & scream into the bed.

#IBD4U

Erotica: Scene Ten – Her Surprise

We’re nearing the end… I hope that you’ve all enjoyed these stories…

Here’s a link to the other scenes… Scene one – Nipple Bells, Scene two – Wake Up Call , Scene Three – His Orgasm & Scene Four – The Wake Up Call , Scene Five – Blindfold, Scene Six – Shower, Scene Seven – Anticipation, Scene Eight – Watching & Scene Nine- Quick Fuck.

Scene Ten – Her Surprise

I finish work early, making sure I get home before him.
I’m determined to give him a surprise.
I put a note on the front door that says “Find me, Finger me, Fuck me.”
I know it will make him smile, the three F’s.
I go to the bedroom, strip down to a black lace panty & bra set, knowing it won’t be on me long.
I lay on the bed, waiting.
When I hear his car pull up, my heart starts to race, like a school girl.
I stand up & keep my back to the bedroom door.
I hear the front door open & close.
I hear his keys hit the entry table & a few of his footsteps but then when he hits the carpet I hear nothing.
I stand there waiting, so ready to turn around & find out where he is.
But I know if I stand here, like he’d want me to, the reward will be so much better.
The hairs stand up all over my body as I feel him walk into the room.
I can’t help but feel a shiver run down my spine as he stands centimeters away from me.
Not touching me, just standing near me.
I love how he can have this effect on me without even touching me.
As his hands touch my shoulders gently, I let out a gasp & lean back gently against him as he steps forward.
Our bodies fitting so well together.

Surprise sex wanting dating
He whispers in my ear “You look perfect”
I smile, feeling every bit as perfect as he sees.
His fingers graze my skin lightly to find my hands, he pulls them together at my back & I feel his neck tie start to be wrap around them.
He ties them with such care but then tightens the fabric & I feel like I won’t get away.
He tugs my pony tail so my head is on his shoulder & my neck exposed for him.
He trails kisses down my neck as a hand glides down the front of me, brushing my covered breast, then settling just above my panty line.
I rock my hips forward to try to get him to dip his hand lower.
He does.
“You’re so wet for me”
I smile moaning as his fingers work his magic & make me cum within a few short minutes.
My arms pulling against his tie, making it even tighter as I cum.
I quiver, my legs weak but he growls in my ear “On your knees.”
I do as I’m told, sinking to my knees, being thankful that he didn’t make me stand much longer.
He walks around in front of me with his cock out, just out through his fly.
One had is around his length rubbing it for his enjoyment, but also I start licking my lips knowing where it is going.
He steps forward & I lick the tip of his cock.
I open my mouth wider for his whole cock to slide in.
He’s hands reach my hair tugging each side to move my head where he wants it.
He starts to fuck my mouth with his thick cock.
I choke on it.
He seems to like it.
I feel helpless with my hands tied behind my back & my hair being pulled to take his cock deeper & deeper.
I try hard not to gag on his cock but it’s too big for me to take.
My eyes start watering & I gag more & more each time he thrusts.
I’m scared I’m going to vomit on him but he keeps going.
Harder & faster & deeper.
Then I feel him about to cum.
He pulls his cock out & starts stroking it, so close to my face, I know he likes to cum on me, but I keep my mouth open because he hasn’t told me to shut it either.
“Oh yes, Good Girl” he growls as his cum hits my mouth, cheeks & a little dribbles down my chin, I poke my tongue out to lick it up, then lean forward to take his cock back in my mouth so as not to waste a drop.

#IBD4U

Guest Blog: Divorce

Another one from my fellow blogger She-Wolf.

I feel like we have a similar writing style & some similar experiences… What do you think? You will find out why some of her posts are so relevant to me & I will reference them when I can!

Thanks for letting me share!

Divorce

So… my marriage is over.

Surprisingly, this is a lot more difficult for me to write about than I expected.

My (now Ex) husband announced last night- via sms- that he plans to reconcile with his ex wife, for the sake of his son.

He was wonderfully articulate about it. He did his best to be gentle and comforting. He could not be more apologetic; so that was something at least. Also, the marriage meant that he had to call it off; he couldn’t turn ghost on me and never speak to me again.

That being said, rejection still stings like a bitch, and after some particularly confronting personal news, this was just the perfect dressing on top of my suck-salad.

I even surprised myself with how well I took it. I didn’t abuse him (which is a big deal for me, given that hell hath no fury like a woman scorned; especially when that woman is me). I didn’t get drunk (like I wanted to). I didn’t bury my face in a trough of ice cream and pity-eat myself up a whole dress size, either.

I cried alone.

I cried on the phone to my best friends.

I cried with my cat.

Eventually, I cried myself to sleep.

It was fitful; I tossed and turned all night. It felt like I had this cinder block of sad, weighing on my chest all night; with bags of gravel being left under my eyes in the morning.

If I’m being truly honest with myself, I knew it was coming. He stopped contacting me as frequently. He stopped his ritual of telling me every day how beautiful and desirable I am, and that no man has a better, more beautiful, intelligent or articulate wife anywhere. He stopped saying that he loved me.

The saddest part in all of this – in my opinion- is not my wasted, much abused heart; it’s that he’s only reconciling with his ex wife for the sake of his child. A parents’ love is a powerful thing. I’m no stranger to it myself.

What I struggle with is the fact that he would rather his child see him miserable- but woth his mother, than happy and without her. Having been the byproduct of a very unhappy home life, I question his decision.

That being said, I haven’t told him that I feel that way. It’s not my place. He’s made his decision and now he has to run with it. I stupidly even suggested that he and I remain friends. He would apparently like that very much. I told him that I could deal with that- being friends- but that he was to never ask me to be his wife again. Given that this is the closest I’ve come to an actual marriage (though I’ve been engaged several times), it hurt me a lot more than anticipated.

Much of that pain comes from the fact that, in the few precious moments we shared as husband and wife, it felt real. I got a taste of what it would be like to have a husband come home to me and treat me well and appreciate me to the fullest. I discovered that I love being called wife, and that having a husband make love to you is a deeper, more profound experience than having a lover that fucks you. I loved that, after cooking for him, he’d look at me like I hung the moon.

Divorce Breakup tragedy

That taste has become like a craving in me- especially now that I’m not getting it. That is something I will have to live with. I have learned through this that, even though it hurts like a bitch, it is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.

I know with certainty that I could be an amazing wife one day, and that any man would be damn lucky to have me. That’s what I’m choosing to take away.

The upside to all this is that I’m now able to keep experimenting with new lovers guilt free, for your reading pleasure. That, and the spiteful part of me feels less bad about cursing my husband and feeding him non-halal meat.

She-Wolf xx

here is the link to the blog: https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/155174584/posts/45

#IBD4U

Erotica: Scene Nine – Quick Fuck

Not many more to go now, only 3 weeks left!

I hope that you’re enjoying these!

Here’s a link to the other scenes… Scene one – Nipple Bells, Scene two – Wake Up Call , Scene Three – His Orgasm & Scene Four – The Wake Up Call , Scene Five – Blindfold, Scene Six – Shower, Scene Seven – Anticipation & Scene Eight – Watching.

Scene Nine – Quick Fuck

As I lie there covered in his cum, panting from such an intense orgasm with a vibe, he stands over me, I turn my head to look at him.
“Fuck, you are so hot”
I giggle.
He grabs my legs by my hips & pulls me down the bed towards him.
As he slowly takes the vibe out of me, I lift my hips to give him a better angle.
He throws it on the bed & he lays on my body keeping my legs up with his hips.
He takes my hands in his & pulls them up above my head, holding eye contact with me again he leans down to kiss me.
His kiss engulfs me, he kisses me deeply till I can barely breathe.
My heart rate still rapid from fucking that vibe for him.
He links fingers with me & trails kisses down my neck.
I finally get a breath.Kink Quick fuck sex dating.pngHe kisses down my shoulders across my collar bone & up the other side of my neck, back to meet my mouth again.
I squirm underneath him to try to get him to let me go, so I can run my hands on his back, though his hair, dig my nails into his back so he knows I’m enjoying it.
But he just holds me firmly down, kissing me, then again moving down one side of my neck across & back up the other side.
I feel his cock between my legs start to twitch & I try to move my hands so I can stroke it & give him some pleasure too.
But he won’t let me move.
As I feel his cock harden between us, lifts his hips, leans down to kiss me as he slides his cock over me, finding my entrance.
He doesn’t slide it but just teases me, putting the tip in ever so slightly, while I try to lift my hips to take him deeper.
He teases me while deeply kissing me, I try to pull away from his kiss to beg him to bury himself deep inside me but he catches my mouth as I move my head.
As I feel myself getting lost in is torture, he slams his hard cock deep inside me, I try to cry out but my mouth is full.
My eyes pop open with surprise but am quickly taken back to the moment.
His pounds me hard, his cock dipping in so deep, then he pulls it all the way out.
So fast.
His rhythm is relentless.
His mouth never leaves mine.
I am moaning against his mouth.
He fucks me so hard, I can feel his balls slapping against my ass.
Once again I try to move to meet his thrusts, to touch his hair, even to scream out in ecstasy but I can’t.
In & out, in & out.
I can’t take it anymore, I start moaning in his mouth, letting him know I am cumming.
My toes curls, my hands squeeze his as he squeezes mine back & I cum with him filling me every where.
It goes on, deeper & deeper, I’m now feeling him do the same noise against my mouth as he cums deep inside me.
Not once does he stop kissing me, until he is completely spent.
He trails a kiss down my neck & lets me hands go, only now I can’t move them.
He stays on top of me, deep inside me, before catching my mouth again for one more kiss.

#IBD4U

Guest Blog: 10 Important Lessons I Learned When I Found My Local Kink Scene

There are many things you should discuss with your partner before embarking on a kink lifestyle. I know that now, but I entered it quite blindly with people who didn’t really know what they were doing. While it worked out alright for me, it could’ve been a very different story.

I want to use this blog to also open the dialogue, why should it be a secret. Like I said in my guest post why I do what I do, I don’t understand why kink & sex is such a taboo subject. I’d rather people know I am into kink & doing it safely, rather than no one knowing about it at all!

Here’s some more tips for you!

10 Important Lessons I Learned When I Found My Local Kink Scene

It seems like more people than ever are experimenting with kink. Many do so from the privacy of their homes and learn from books and websites like this one. I found it even more helpful to explore my local kink scene at the same time. Finding the kink scene was one of the most transformative experiences of my life. Here are the 10 important lessons I learned.Local kink scene, dating sex.png1. How to Set Boundaries

In the kink scene, it’s standard for people to negotiate what they are and aren’t OK with before playing together. Essentially, the submissive explicitly sets boundaries with the dominant. These boundaries are normally known as hard and soft limits. Hard limits are things that you don’t want done to you under any circumstances. Soft limits are typically things that maybe you are kind of hesitant to take on. Or you’re only willing to do them with certain people or at certain times.

There are BDSM checklists that you can print off to help you have those discussions. No matter what a submissive’s limits are, it’s a standard practice to clearly establish them before playing. This is especially important because the dominant and submissive are operating outside of societal norms of what’s right and wrong.

As a recovering people pleaser, I found the process of setting limits within my BDSM practice translated into learning to set them in my personal life. I started to push back on friends or relatives who ignored boundaries I set. I also became better at clearly stating those boundaries in the first place.

2. Something Can Be Scary and Not Kill You

It is completely natural to avoid what we fear. Fear is an extremely intense emotion. Often, fear limits us in ways that actually impede our survival. Fear might keep us from switching jobs when our current employer isn’t treating us well – or prevent us from even looking at other opportunities. Fear might make us stay in a relationship that’s unhealthy because we’re afraid of being alone.

I was scared to death when I joined the kink community. I’ve also had scenes that scared the pants off me (sometimes, quite literally). I survived. Challenging those fears ended up being incredibly fulfilling for me. It was a rush to conquer my fears and make it to the other side. I also gained the knowledge that I am capable of handling much more than I thought I could.

Whether it’s a new sexual act that you’re nervous about trying or a big life change, the unknown can be terrifying. It’s also where some of the best things in life are. Facing fears is the only way you grow.

3. You Can Tolerate Pain & Survive

One of the biggest lessons I learned was that just because someone is hurting (even me), it doesn’t mean that anyone did anything wrong. I also learned that just because something hurts right now, doesn’t mean that it will hurt forever.

In fact, a lot of positive changes require that you tolerate pain or discomfort on the way to achieving your goals. People typically understand this when it comes to changes like dieting or going to the gym, but they usually have a hard time translating it to emotional growth.

Playing in the kink community directly increased my physical pain tolerance, but that wasn’t the only change. It helped me develop self-control and the ability to delay gratification, two strengths that I use constantly in my personal life.

4. You Can Do You

I was like a lot of people who first show up in their local kink scene: Really unsure of myself. I felt curious and a little ashamed that I was exploring something that society thought was taboo.

What I found was one of the most accepting communities I’d ever encountered. Like any community, it has its quirks but by and large, I noticed a very encouraging pattern: People who had been active on the kink scene for a while owned their fetishes. They didn’t seem ashamed at all. They were proud of them.

Little by little, as I spent time with them, I built up my own sense of personal security. Over time, the petty things people said to me became less like valid criticisms and more like noise. I learned to qualify the person who criticized me to determine whether they were an accurate judge of the subject (and me) or not. If the criticism didn’t come from a source I respected, I simply stopped caring about it. I found that if someone doled out baseless criticisms about things that they didn’t have much knowledge about or hadn’t experienced themselves, it didn’t make me doubt myself. It made me doubt them.

Once I stopped constantly shaming myself and responding in a knee-jerk way to the shaming from others, I focused more on building and understanding my own values system to define my own sense of what is and isn’t important to me.

Again, this didn’t just help me within the kink community. It made me a more effective manager and consultant within the workplace. It made me a better friend.

5. There’s a Difference Between a Dominant and a Control Freak

A lot of people dipping their toe into kink for the first time will start by going online and chatting with people. While this can be an easy and discreet way to find like-minded others, it can be very difficult online to differentiate between people who are healthy, experienced dominants and control freaks claiming to be dominants who’ve just watched a lot of bad porn.

A good dominant:

*Cares whether a submissive provides consent

*Will negotiate and respect whatever limits and boundaries are set

*Doesn’t just take power and control, they take responsibility

While it might be scary to set foot in a real life kink group for the first time, I’ve found that getting connected to a local kink community is one of the best ways to sort out this difference. It’s much easier to tell all of these things in person.

6. We’re Into Different Things, Which IS Why Consent Is Important

There are some common sayings in the kink scene that acknowledge that while some people are into certain stuff and other people aren’t, it’s OK. A few of these are Your Kink Is OK and Your Kink Is Not My Kink, But Your Kink Is OK, or YKIOK or YKINMKBYKIOK (for short…ish).

What’s important here is that the kink scene openly acknowledges that one person’s kink is another person’s squick. Or that one person’s yummy is another person’s yuck.

It is most important that whatever people are doing involves clear consent. If it makes everyone happy and it’s not harming anyone (as opposed to hurting them, because as I wrote above, pain isn’t necessarily bad in the right context), then it’s a good time.

This was a really liberating idea that followed me everywhere else. Maybe certain people didn’t get my life choices, but they made sense to me and the people close to me and that was what was really important.

7. Don’t Trust People Who Don’t Respect Your Boundaries

Once you get used to explicitly setting boundaries , it becomes painfully clear who doesn’t respect them. And who will repeatedly violate them.

This was a painful realization in the short term because I did lose some people from my life. Yet, it was the best thing that ever happened to me. Because I had more time for people who did respect my boundaries, I also had more time and energy to pursue things that fulfilled me rather than things that drained me.

It was a huge lesson. People all mostly act alike when you say yes to them. It’s when you start saying no to people that you really see who they are. Because most people can tolerate a reasonably stated no.

If they can’t, that’s not a person you should trust.

It doesn’t matter if they’re a top with a flogger, your best friend from college, or your mother-in-law.

8. You Learn to Recognize the Real Deal from the Fakers

I’ve met some of the most brilliant, adventurous, and just plain old fun people I’ve ever known in my local kink scene.

That said, I’ve also met some braggadocios who puff themselves up and lie about having kink experience and competence that they don’t have, essentially padding their kinky resumes with things they haven’t actually done. Maybe they saw it done once at another club and they tell you that they did it. Or maybe they say they have an extensive military background where they learned all sorts of rope and knife tricks – and you find out, no, wait, actually, they dropped out of basic training and watched a bunch of action movies.

I learned a lot by meeting people and observing them. I’ve even learned by personal experience. Over time, I developed a natural instinct where I could more easily spot a hype man much sooner and from a further distance away.

And this isn’t just useful in the kink seen. This lesson is also especially helpful in business meetings. Or when a friend is dating someone they’re gaa-gaa over who just sits with me the wrong way.

9. Watch Out for People Who Want Power & No Responsibility

As I mentioned above, a key difference between a dominant and a controlling person is that a dominant takes on responsibility when they take on power and a controlling person doesn’t.

I’m extra sensitive when it comes to spotting people who want to make decisions but don’t want to have any responsibility for the outcome of those decisions. I learned this difference on the kink scene, but just like the rest of these, I’ve found that I’m also better able to spot this difference in other settings too.

For example, it helps me figure out the difference between a good boss and a bad boss.

10. Reputation Can Help Keep You Safe.

The kink scene has its downsides just like any other community, but it definitely has some built-in safeguards that (although not foolproof) absolutely help make things a little better and, often, safer.

One of these is the power of reputation. I typically don’t play with brand new people. Instead, I tend to observe them for a while and talk to other people who have known them longer.

If I discover one “enemy,” it isn’t enough for me to consider someone a persona non grata (everyone has a bitter ex or two, myself included). However, I do pay special attention to patterns. If I hear negative things from enough people, especially people whose opinions I’ve come to respect and tend to be credible, that’s enough to give me serious pause.

It’s actually changed the way that I date. I like to know people for a while and get a sense of who their friends are before I get seriously involved. It means that I’m typically friends for a while first. This isn’t something that everyone is open to (a slow transition into a relationship), and that’s fine. However, it’s really been the best way I’ve found of assessing if someone’s life is going to match well with my own and vice versa.

Here is the link should you want to read it. https://www.kinkly.com/10-important-lessons-i-learned-when-i-found-my-local-kink-scene/2/17262

#IBD4U

Erotica: Scene Eight – Watching

We’re getting close the end of the erotica series… What do you all think so far?

Here’s a link to the other scenes… Scene one – Nipple Bells, Scene two – Wake Up Call , Scene Three – His Orgasm & Scene Four – The Wake Up Call , Scene Five – Blindfold, Scene Six – Shower & Scene Seven – Anticipation

Scene Eight – Watching

I’m sitting on the edge of the bed when he walks in carrying something behind his back, smiling like a Cheshire cat.
I look up from unbuckling my sandals and can’t help but match his infections smile.
He hands me a black gift bag, I take it from him asking what’s it for.
“Open it” he says stepping back to sit on the chair in the corner of our room.
I smile, untying the ribbon & peering inside.
It’s a vibrator.
It’s white, long like a smooth fancy rabbit type device.
I am unable to hide my stunned look at what seems like such an odd gift.
There is also a bottle of toy cleaner, I take them out of the bag & hold them up, cocking my head to one side as if to say ‘WTF?’ as the gift bag breaks the silence falling to the floor from my lap.
“I want to watch you use it”
I blush & start to open my mouth to say that I can’t.
“Don’t think, just stand up & strip”
I hesitate
“Now” His voice is stern, not to be questioned, so I stand up, he does the same.
I turn so he can unzip my dress, which he does ever so slowly, his fingers unnecessarily grazing my skin.
The dress falls in a puddle by my feet, his hands lingering on my shoulders a moment.
I unclasp my bra & slowly turn to face him, he is already in just his boxers.
Our eyes lock.
I hook my fingers into my panties, he does the same in the band of his boxers & without looking away we both bend down till gravity takes the last remaining clothing to the floor.
He sits back in the chair, his hands resting on the arm rests of the tub chair.
I suddenly feel shy & vulnerable.
“I’m waiting”

Kink erotica sex watching.png

I look up at him, his face says it all.
I turn & sit on the edge of the bed, my fingers shaking as I pick up the new vibrator still in it’s packaging.
I take it out & spray it carefully with the toy cleaner, rubbing my hand up & down seductively.
Feeling brave, I decide to tease him a little & put it up to my lips to lightly suck the end of it.
I slide it further into my mouth not breaking eye contact with him & his mouth makes the shape of a O & he makes a manly laughing grunt sound, that lets me know he likes what he sees.
I see his cock twitching in his lap & I long to touch it, but it’s not what he wants.
I feel self conscious but I know he thinks I’m sexy, he tells me all the time.
I want to do this for him & feel as sexy as he sees me.
I click it on & it buzzes to life.
I turn it on to a pulsing setting & sit back a little further on the bed so my calves are still hanging partially off the bed.
I spread them wide & run the buzzing vibrator from my ankle all the way up to where I want it to touch.
I don’t hit that spot, I graze over it & down the other leg.
I bring it back up to run up my side & over my nipples where I shiver.
His cock starts to react as I glide the vibrator between my breasts & down south, towards the sweet spot.
As it hits my clit, I jump & moan.
I slip it between my legs so I am almost sitting on it.
I click the switch & turn it up a little.
I start to rock my hips on it, grinding against the vibe pulses.
I run my hands up across my breasts & rub my nipples till they are standing erect by themselves.
I look over to him, his cock is hard, it rests against his stomach, he hasn’t touched it yet, his hands are still on the arm rests.
I feel like I am wet enough to slide the vibe inside me, so I find another pulsing setting, bring one leg up to the edge of the bed so I am wide open to him.
I start poking the vibe in & out, shallow at first with each thrust it goes a little deeper inside me till it’s fully inside with smooth rabbit part resting on my clit.
I lean back on my hands, arching my back, tipping my head back, grinding my hips hard & starting to fuck it.
My breathing becomes loud, short & heavy.
My eyes are close as I rock hard & fast against the vibe.
I keep my legs still & locked, knowing from experience, of being tied down by him, that the orgasm will be much more intense.
I can almost not bare it anymore.
“Can I cum sir?”
“Good Girl” I can hear the smile in his voice.
I’m biting my lip, moving my hips even fast as my legs start to shake.
I lift my head to look at him, his gaze intense, his hand now furiously stroking his cock as I struggle to keep my wits about me.
His deep, dark gaze holds my attention, I can tell he doesn’t want me to look away, I lock my eyes to his.
As I’m about to beg him, his just simply says
“Cum”
I cry out, digging my nails into the bed behind me, I make a fist in the sheets. I rock harder & harder.
He stands just as my orgasm starts to take over.
Our eyes still locked, I want to look away but I can tell he wants this intimacy, this connection.
One stride & he is centimeters away, stroking his cock.
“I’m cumming” I cry out as his furiously strokes his cock
“Fuccckkkkk” I yell, incoherently
He mimics me in a deep voice as his cum spurts on my breasts.
He keeps rubbing his cock, groaning as if he wanted that that to go on.
He reaches between my legs & clicks off the vibe.
I instantly flop back onto the bed.
Completely spent, completely his. He hisses ‘yes’ though his teeth & I know I have pleased him.

#IBD4U

Guest Blog: 13 Things To Try If You’re New to BDSM

So, I’ve been doing some research for you all, as I am no expert! Some of my guest blogs, they’ve been articles abut the kink community, not actual other dating stories from my readers…

A friend shared this one & I thought it was perfect for those thinking they may want to try this kink world but are too scared at how to go about it. I started off slow & if you keep reading you’ll find out a lot more of this kink world I get into, however this article has some great ways to start exploring with your partner.

I will always suggest that you have a conversation with your partner before trying anything with them, consent even for a simple light spank is very important. Communication is the key, I was missing that with some of my exploration & now I am deeper in to kink, I understand how much communication can be required with a new partner!

Enjoy…

13 Things To Try If You’re New To BDSM

OK, so you know you’re turned on by BDSM and kink. You’ve thought a lot about it and maybe you’ve even done some of the things that the experts recommend you do before you get started with BDSM. (Sign up for that FetLife account yet?) You’re ready to start thinking about and planning your first “session” but… You’re not totally sure where to start. Perhaps your fantasies are more varsity level than JV and you want to start slow or maybe you’re just at a loss for ideas because, well, you’re a newbie!

Before we even get into activities, though, I want to take a minute and reassure you a little bit. I know that BDSM and kink can get kind of a bad rap in the media, like it’s some kind of deviant activity that only messed up people are into. Like a lot of things we see in mainstream media, though, that’s a total load of BS. BDSM and kink are practiced by all kinds of people with all kinds of backgrounds — and they play a huge role in the fantasy lives for a large proportion of women. There is nothing wrong with being into kinky sex play and it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. All it means, in the end, is that you’re into kinky sex play!

Now that we have that out of the way, it’s time to get down to the nitty gritty. I have a million kinky friends (well, maybe not a million, but quite a few) who are happy to share their expertise on great entry level kink and BDSM activities for those of you who are 100 percent new to the game. I decide to focus specifically on suggestions made by Miette Rouge, 43, and Jenna, 26, both of whom are active members of their respective kink scenes. One more thing before we get started, though: they both wanted me to remind all of you that communication — before and after — is essential if you’re going to try any of these BDSM 1.0 things. Other than that? Enjoy!

10 lesson of my local kink scene sex dating

1. Hair Pulling

Miette suggests hair pulling as a good way to start getting into kinky play. It’s easy, doesn’t require any toys, and can be as gentle or as rough as you want it to be.

2. Light Spanking

Spanking is definitely a common fantasy and starting lightly is a good idea, with the option of ramping it up as you go, of course. Start with hands and then incorporate toys as you and your partner(s) become more experienced.

“I found it really exciting as a beginner to be told I had to count the number of blows I was going to receive because it was not only a pain thing, but a power thing,” Jenna tells Bustle.

3. Aggressive Language

Miette suggests incorporating aggressive language into your play. Words like “slut,” “whore,” “jerk,” “wimp,” and “f*ck” are all good places to start. Name calling, however, should definitely be pre-negotiated, as one slut’s turn on may be another jerk’s major turn off.

4. Tying Up With A Scarf

A lot of people fantasize about bondage and scarves a good place to start because they’re soft and it’s hard to do real damage with them — unlike, you know, rope and handcuffs. Miette’s main tip is to make sure that two fingers can be slipped between the tie and the skin in order to avoid cutting off circulation, which definitely can do damage.

5. Under The Bed Restraints

Once you’re ready to move on from scarves, Jenna recommends trying out under the bed restraints or “just canvas strap restraints.”

“Even if you don’t do anything else besides fool around, if you’ve never done it before giving up control over your body is an exciting intro to BDSM for beginners,” says Jenna.

6. Incorporating “Sir” Or “Madam”

In addition to aggressive language, Miette advises that a “sir” or “madam” can do wonder to set the stage. It’s a simple way to establish roles in a dom/sub scene and keep you both involved in the fantasy.

7. Biting

Biting is a great entry-level way to play, but Miette warns that talking about it beforehand is again essential — and part of that talk should be about marks. Some people are into them and some people really aren’t, so make sure you know where your partner stands before you start chomping down.

8. Subbing/Topping Role Playing

Jenna suggests that “something as simple as having your arms tied behind your back while performing oral sex” can be a really hot entry level activity for people who are just getting started. Other suggestions might include begging (for sex or punishment) as well as being put in or putting someone in a submissive physical position.

9. Play With “Pervertables”

Miette is really into what she calls “pervertables,” which are basically every day objects that can be transformed into toys. She recommends things like wooden spoons, brushes, spatulas and narrow things like canes, thin belts, and rulers with the metal guide on them if you want to make a mark. The best thing about these toys, according to Miette, is that no one but other kinksters will recognize them for what they are. They’re like a kinky secret signal!

10. Sensation Play With A Blindfold.

Both Miette and Jenna recommend blindfolded sensation play. What does that mean, you ask? Basically, you lightly restrain someone (or are restrained yourself, depending on your preference), blindfold them, and then introduce various sensations with various objects. So maybe you run a feather over them or you pinch them or you give them a spank or tease them to edge of orgasm. The idea is allow the non-blindfolded person to have control of everything that’s happening and for the blindfolded person to surrender control to them.

11. Floggers

A flogger is more like a BDSM 1.1 step rather than a BDSM 1.0 step, according to Jenna. She recommends to newbies, though, because the pain it provides isn’t very intense but it looks scary, which can heighten your enjoyment of it. Her second tip when it comes to this kind of pain play? “Leave the cane for once you’ve experienced a little more, because that sh*t hurts.”

12. Clothespins

Jenna also thinks that clothespins — which can be adjusted and removed quickly, if need be — are a good way to start exploring pain thresholds. She recommends trying them out on nipples, stomach, and inner thigh at first as you start to understand your or your partner’s limits. Once you’ve mastered these,

13. Candle wax

Candle wax is another way to play that Jenna tells Bustle “seems scary but isn’t, isn’t that painful, and is an exciting way to intro/explore pain.” Her only warning is that you do some research beforehand about different types of candles, as certain kinds burn hotter than others and those are the ones you don’t want.

Here is the website to this article https://www.bustle.com/articles/133513-13-things-to-try-if-youre-new-to-bdsm

#IBD4U

Erotica: Scene Seven – Anticipation

Are we enjoying this erotica? I’m not sure… Let me know… Not many to go.

Here are the other instalments to read again or for the first time… Scene one – Nipple Bells, Scene two – Wake Up Call , Scene Three – His Orgasm & Scene Four – The Wake Up Call , Scene Five – Blindfold & Scene Six – Shower

Scene Seven – Anticipation

I walk in the door after work, after spending the day with my mind wandering, thinking about us in the shower this morning.
I call out his name, but no response.
I walk into the kitchen to see if he’s cooking dinner, but he isn’t there.
There’s two glasses of red wine sitting next to a open bottle, I pick up one & take a sip.
Hmmm, my favourite shiraz.
I pick up the other glass & set out to find him.
He has to be here somewhere.
I walk up the hallway glancing in the rooms, the finally into the master bedroom.
All the lights are off, so I put his wine glass down to switch it on.
He is no where to be found but his message on the bed is crystal clear.
There is a blindfold, a butt plug, a flogger & a pair of lace panties, in a small pile.
The sight of these four items send a shiver down my spine & straight to my pussy where I feel myself start to lubricate in anticipation, while my nipples strain against my bra.
I put my wine down & quickly strip out of my work skirt, slipping my underwear down my legs as I step out the skirt.
I unbutton my shirt & unclasp my bra wondering where he is.
I quickly slip into the panties that he left me & slip the blindfold over my head, resting it on my forehead.
I can’t decide if I should put the butt plug in or if he would like to do that for me.

Erotica Anticipation sex dating.png
I take a sip of wine, I don’t want to choose the wrong thing.
However the punishment will be painful ecstasy.
I decide to kneel on the edge of the bed, only my toes hanging off & I bend my body to rest my shoulders on the covers, so my ass is poking up for him to put it in.
I carefully put the butt plug next to me so he can see what I have done for him.
I pull the blindfold over my eyes, grab my ankles with my hands & wait.
I wait…
& wait…
& wait…
It feels like forever, I have tried not to move too much however I have been squirming & my panties are now tight & rubbing my clit with each movement.
I know they will be soaked.
I feel his presence before I hear his movements behind me.
All the hairs on my arms stand up as if frightened but excited at whatever he has planned.
I ache for him to touch me, but all I feel is his hand brush so lightly I almost don’t even know it’s happened when he picks up the butt plug.
“I wondered what you would do with this” he smiles & I think he is sucking something, the butt plug perhaps?
“Open” I feel something at my mouth, I open as I am told & a warm wet thing goes deep into my mouth.
I taste him.
He did suck the butt plug and then made me suck it.
He rubs my ass as he pulls the panties to one side then puts the tip of the plug at my puckered hole before slowly sliding it inside me.
I moan so loudly as it slips easily inside & then he moves my panties back in place.
He spanks my ass with his hand & I yelp.
“You are perfect” he whispers close to my ear as I feel him pick up the flogger.
“I’m glad I didn’t leave you instructions now, you look better than I could’ve imagined.”
I feel him rub his hand over my bare ass & then plant a light kiss on my right cheek.
“Don’t move from this position”
I brace myself for the flogger…
I tense my whole body, waiting for the first blow, which is always the worst.
When he hits me I let out a moan, while it hurts, it also is blissful.
How can something that’s so wrong, turn me on so much?
I relax a little as he flogs me over & over, on my ass, across my back, on my legs, on the base of the butt plug.
I swear in ecstasy, my body ready to cum.
How can I cum from just being flogged with a butt plug?
“I want you to cum like this”
My breathing gets short & deep.
I start to rock back & forth
“Stay still”
I lock my arms ridged, grabbing my ankles, digging my fingernails into my skin.
The flogger hits me over & over again then I cum, quivering & shaking as my body tries to keep the butt plug inside me.
Its intense, it consumes me & feel the butt plug slipping out, but he pushes it back inside me which causes me to keep cumming.
He drops the flogger next to me as he runs his fingers from my neck to my backside, dragging his fingernails along my sensitive skin.
I shudder & goosebumps cover my skin as my breathing tries go back to normal.

#IBD4U

Guest Blogger: The Internet’s for PORN!

I agree with this 100%… I used to be one of those chicks who was annoyed her boyfriend watched porn, especially when I found a massive porn collection that was never shared with me… But it’s so normal, everyone in their life has probably watched some porn.

Now, these days, I go through phases with porn, I don’t watch it a lot but I like to watch it. I have specific tastes in what I choose to watch too. I even have specific tastes on porn stars that I like to watch too… I won’t just watch anything! But I definitely think that people should watch porn if they like it & not be afraid to talk about it!

I have also recently discovered that my new smart TV’s have internet browsers, so I can watch porn directly on my TV… It’s annoying to use the remote control, so I think I prefer using my phone however, wow, I watched a lot of porn once I discovered that…

These tips are spot on, I used to be a bit of a starfish lover, but obviously had a sexual awakening & am told by quite a few men that I am nothing like a starfish lover! (Which is always good to hear!)

Porn is fun! Porn is fun alone, porn is fun with your partner, even your own homemade porn is fun (yeah… stories to come! hahaha) Find the type of porn you like & have fun with it!

Let’s get it off the taboo list too!

The Internet’s for PORN!

Let me start by saying I ❤️ Porn!

No, seriously; I really do.

As in I watch porn almost every day. Whenever I’m having some solo time, I’m watching porn while I double-click my mouse.

Personally, I see no harm in it. I know a lot of girls out there are put off by a man who watches a lot of porn, because they feel insecure about their own desirability, but let me assure you that it’s not a problem- if he’s still sleeping with you, he’s still into you on some level.

Internet is for porn sex dating.png

His porn choices can also give you a clue as to what kind of bed play he likes, or wants to try out. It’s the easiest way to work out what you’ll be in for, or what your personal limits might be.

For example, I haven’t minded dressing up like a naughty school girl, but I baulked at my foot slave dressing up like one and getting pegged by yours truly.

It can be a great intimacy tool, too. Ask your partner to watch some porn together, and then act out the scene, or indulge in a little solo or mutually beneficial play as you watch. You can also play a game of hold out, and see who cracks first.

The possibilities are endless.

Porn was one of the best guides for how to be a great lay, and I think a lot of women don’t get past their insecurities to see this.

The Pro tips I’ve extracted from porn for real life application are this:

– keep your hands busy; touch him, touch yourself, whatever. Just use them.

– eye contact; it builds intensity.

– participate and/ or take control once in a while; no one likes a star fish!

– don’t be afraid to say what you want.

Go watch some porn now, if you don’t believe me!

She-Wolf xx

 

If you want to read her blog: https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/155174584/posts/113

#IBD4U

Erotica: Scene Six – Shower

Halfway though the series, tell me what you guys a thinking of this fiction!

Here are the other instalments to read again or for the first time… Scene one – Nipple Bells, Scene two – Wake Up Call , Scene Three – His Orgasm & Scene Four – The Wake Up Call & Scene Five – Blindfold

Scene Six – Shower

The sunlight streaming through the window hits my face, it reminds me of a movie scene but this is real life.
I feel his strong arms around me holding me so tight, I never want him to let me go.
I try to move a little & he stirs behind me.
As he rolls over onto his back I roll with him, settling in his nook, his fingers running up & down my bare skin of my back.
I snuggle into his chest, with my arm resting across his torso.
I run my fingers on his side, feeling his seemingly flawless skin under my finger tips.
His hand on my back strokes my hair softly in long stokes, when suddenly he fists my hair & pulls my face to look up at him.
His mouth meets mine, I try to pull away, I have morning breath but his strong hand holds me right where he wants me.
His tongue invades my mouth, exploring & teasing me till I moan against his lips.
When he finally pulls away he releases my hair & begins stroking it again.
His hand runs all the way down my back to my bare ass & he gives it one hard spank, I jump and squeal
“Time to shower”
He jumps out of bed & the shower is on before I even know what has just happened.
I scurried out of bed, being tangled in the sheets, he’s already rinsing shampoo out of his hair.
I feel my face drop, he’s going to be getting out before I even get in.
I open the door a cautiously step in feeling self conscious, like an intruder, my arms twisted lengthways over my breasts as if to hide them.
He ignores my presence & continues to wash his hair.
I’m barely getting any water & am starting to feel like a unwanted guest.
He runs his fingers through his hair while it’s under the spray of the shower, then down his body to his sides.
He makes eye contact with me, I instantly feel reassured, I’d never be an unwanted guest in his shower.

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His movements are quick this morning, he has spun me around with my hands on the wall up above me before I can even think about what he’s doing.
He pulls my hips towards him so I’m almost bent over, then he uses his legs to spread mine to the walls.
His already hard cock is rubbing between my legs & his hands reach around to take my breasts into them, kneading my nipples in his thumb and forefinger.
I push back with my hips, letting out a sigh.
“I want you inside me Sir”
He growls as one hand leaves my breast & guides his cock inside me.
I let out a groan, his hand reaches around to rub little light circles on my clit as he builds up some speed.
He’s pounding in and out, in and out, I really struggle to stand still but he tells me to hold on, so I know to brace myself against the cold tiles.
He changes positions and it’s almost like his cock comes up from underneath me.
He’s deep and fast.
My breathing is rapid and I’m moaning, begging him to make me cum.
He switches positions again, taking both my hips in his hands and really starts pounding me.
I cry out from how deep he is inside me.
He slows down, his hand reach around for my clit again & he kisses my shoulders
“Do you want to cum?”
I make a hmmm sound & push my hips back to take him deeper with his slow thrusts
“Answer me”
“Yes sir, I want to cum for you”
His thrusts remain the same speed & depth but his hand on my clit speeds up but keeps a constant light pressure.
I feel it happening, I’m building up, I start to make the tell tale breathing noises & try to dig my nails into the tiles.
My face ends up pressed against the tiles, I start to lift up to my tippy toes, I feel like my nails will snap off the nail bed with how hard I am trying to dig them into the tiles.
“Cum now’
His deep voice commands of me & my body obeys him.
He picks up the pace, kissing my shoulders as he grabs my hips with both hands, riding my orgasm though to his own.
He cries out & I feel his warm cum fill me up deep inside.
His hands rub my ass & then he smacks it causing me to jump, he always catches me off guard.
He pulls me up against him, while he’s still inside me
His hands run up my belly to my nipples which he take in his fingers tugging them.
He kisses my neck and works his way up to my ear and growls
“I can’t fucking control myself with you”

#IBD4U

Guest Blogger: Why I do what I do?

I have decided to be my own guest blogger today!

I get told a lot that I am very brave – maybe I am, maybe I’m just stupid! When other women write to me, they tell me that they couldn’t do what I do, I think why not? I’m nothing special. Some have even told me they have been writing their stories too, but aren’t brave enough to share them – even with me!

I was just like you once!

So I started writing… I wrote & wrote all my thoughts, as a diary (YES this is my diary, so please don’t judge the decisions I make!) Then when I was brave enough, I started posting. But the blog flopped because I wasn’t ready & I was too insecure about my dating life – my writing has also evolved as I have as a person since I started back in 2016. I felt so alone, like no one else would possibly be going through what I was. But I was very very wrong! So I started posting again & bam, almost 1000 followers in 6 months!!!

My aim has always been to empower women (& men), to realise they are not alone – you may feel it because we don’t often talk about this stuff with our coupled friends, but you are definitely not alone! Remember in my About Me, my first ever blog post I talk about how much I felt alone while dating in Adelaide, & even reading other blogs, I felt like my experiences were similar but I still felt alone.

I am sure that there are other women out there, whether you’re in Adelaide or somewhere else in the world, who will relate to the things that I go through on a daily basis, who may feel alone but I hope that this will open your eyes to the fact that you are not alone, there are others out there & even though you keep meeting “Retards in Tin Foil”, I still believe there is a “Knight in Shining Armour” out there for all of us.

I also discuss this in my Bonus Post – FAQ’s where I again want to help, I am doing this as a service.

I started writing because so many people told me too but I also felt a little alone in my dating life. Pretty much all of my friends have partners & the single ones don’t seem to have the same experiences I do. But I thought, I surely can’t be alone in this. So I started writing, then finally posting them & now the feedback I get is how relatable it is to people. So if I can make even one person not feel alone in their dating journey, then I feel successful.

One thing that concerns me, is why do you have so many taboo subjects when it comes to dating? I am into kinky stuff, why can’t I share that with my friends or even family? Isn’t it safer if the people closest to me know what I do in my spare time in case something happens? It’s sort of like a woman being pregnant, I watched my sister have multiple miscarriages early on in her pregnancies, but because of the risks & what society tells us to do, she didn’t tell anyone at work or close friends about the miscarriages & went through them alone or with only a little support… WHY? Why do we have to go through anything alone? Why can’t we start the conversation!

Guest post why I do what I do. Dating. Empower

I was, when I started writing (& I still am) scared about how honest my posts are, but I think you deserve to hear the truth – honest, brutal & sometimes very vulnerable… I know that there are some topics I discuss that some people don’t agree with. (There are plenty more coming too…) But I urge you, if you’re a women reading this, we should be building each other up, we have enough inequality in the world without bringing each other down. So when you see a post that you may not agree with, I will appreciate your support as you read my journey.

I don’t regret anything I have done, I mean I would definitely change some things if I had my time over, however I don’t need judgement, I can’t change the decisions I made at the time & remember they were right for me at the time. These decisions have led me to who I am today.

Remember also that these blogs that you are reading are not written in real time. I explain in Bonus Post – FAQ’s why that is. I want to be respectful to the man I am dating, but I also personally need time to reflect on what happened too…

I also get asked a lot how old these stories are. I don’t post as I am dating these guys, mainly because I want to live in the moment & enjoy it but also because I never know what might happen. Many of these stories are quite some time ago, some more recent, they aren’t in any particular order but I do try to keep the time line straight. Especially when posting multiple stories about a guy & when they intertwine with other stories (When I’m trying to juggle men). But rest assured, I do have enough stories over the last decade to keep this blog alive!

I am currently busily writing about the last few years plus still dating to ensure the survival of the blog & find my retard in tin foil but if I do say so myself, my life does get a little juicer as I get older. (They don’t call it dirty thirties for nothing!) So stay tuned, but read at your own risk of knowing too much about me!

I love all your kind words, I am so thankful that my passion project has been so successful to date… Including my erotica fiction!

If you know who I am, I am sorry, but I do always say read at your own risk – So clearly you’re intrigued by my life, or you wouldn’t still be reading! Hahaha. Enjoy!

But more importantly, I just want us all to start having those uncomfortable conversations with each other, lets empower each other as women (& as men) to be supportive, not trying to bring someone down…

#IBD4U

Erotica: Scene Five – Blindfold

My fiction erotica… If you follow my blog, surely by now, you can definitely tell why I was writing this?

Here are the other instalments to read again or for the first time… Scene one – Nipple Bells, Scene two – Wake Up Call , Scene Three – His Orgasm & Scene Four – The Wake Up Call.

Scene Five – Blindfold

I lay there feeling so sated but he hasn’t cum, so I know there is more in store for me.
“You never told me that you could squirt”
I go bright red, I am still covered in his now dry cum & also my own.
He touches my blushing cheek
“Don’t be ashamed of it, I love it. Knowing I turn you on so much. Fuck it’s sexy.”
I smile feeling reassured.
I love that he can read my emotions so well & does everything he can to make me feel at ease.
I trust him wholeheartedly.
Before my breathing is back to normal, he gets up off the bed.
I hear a draw open & close, I can’t move, I am so spent from my multiple hard orgasms.
Plus who even knows what time it is.
I feel my head dip a little where his knee hits the bed, he’s kneeling by my head & I open my mouth thinking he wants me to suck him.
One of his fingers rests on my chin & closes my mouth.
He puts something on my head & I realise he’s blindfolding me, as everything goes dark.
I wriggle in my restraints.
What does he have planned for me?

Erotica couples sex

I feel him retreat from the bed & I can hear noise but I can’t work out what he is doing.
Then I feel something tickle my foot, I twitch, I realise he has a feather as it runs up to my knee, making me squirm & moan.
“Do you like that baby?”
“Hmmm, yes sir!”
He runs the feather up my leg, over my belly, across my nipple then up my arm, where he moves to the other arm & comes down doing the exact same on my other side.
When he reaches my other foot, he takes the feather away, I lift my head to try & see but of course I am blindfolded so I listen intently for where he is.
All of a sudden it reappears at my hip, he runs it from side to side, across the top of my pubic hair.
I am quivering & squirming with every delicate touch.
When he lowers it between my folds, I jump & moan, I pull on my restraints.
Without warning he hits me across my belly with a flogger.
I hear the snapping on the tails hitting me as I squeal out, in pain, in ecstasy, in anticipation.
He hits me again across my breast, I arch my back & let out a moan.
I feel the feather still tickling my clit as the flogger comes down on my legs.
in quick succession, he hits all three places again, I keep pulling on my restraints, crying out louder each time.
He keeps the flogger quickly moving up & down from my belly to legs to nipples.
I don’t even notice that he is kneeling between my legs until his cock is at my entrance, dipping in & out while he flogs my breasts only.
I arch my back trying to take his cock in deeper
“Greedy Girl” he chuckles as I beg him to be deep inside me.
Suddenly he stops flogging me & I feel him undo the cuffs from the bed at my ankles.
With my legs straight in the air, he slides his cock deep within me, I cry out as I’m finally getting what I want.
He starts off with a slow rhythm, deep & long.
He builds up some speed holding onto my ankles wide by his face. My arms still restrained & my eyes still covered.
I bite my lip, he tells me how much he loves to see me bite my lip.
He spreads my legs wide, pulling his cock right out of me then slams in deep, draping himself over my body to kiss my lips, holding my legs out.
His cock pounds me over & over, relentlessly.
He doesn’t let me come up for air, his tongue invading my mouth.
Without even trying I am close to cumming trying to pull away from his mouth to get some air.
With only a few more strokes deep inside me, I cum on his cock, moaning in his mouth.
It doesn’t take long before he is riding my orgasm though to his own.
Finally he stops kissing me & I breathe hard trying to regain some normality.
Once we are both breathing almost normally, his cock still twitching in my pulsing pussy, he leans back over to sweetly kiss me, deep, long & with such passion, I realise then that I don’t ever want to kiss anyone else.
He slides the blindfold off my head, looking deep into my eyes, he rubs his nose back & forth on mine before he kisses me on the lips again.
As he pulls out of me, I suddenly feel empty.
He moves to undo both wrist cuffs from the bed & he pulls me against him with his strong arms around me, almost pinning my arms to me.
I know I am safe. I know I am home.
“Sleep now”
But I barely hear his words before I am asleep again.

#IBD4U