So this guy… Rob Rob – Well he comes & goes over the year I am with Noodle. This is a bit of a flashback blog post – Remember when I said there was a guy I went for a coffee with & I couldn’t remember who it was? It was actually Rob Rob, which is great that I had written this because otherwise we may never know what happened at that “coffee” date. However, I probably should’ve posted this before. So we’re flashing back right now to that coffee date. But aslo we flash forward too because it’s not long enough for a whole post on its own… Stick with me, it’ll make sense.
I never give Rob Rob too much of my time because of the way he treats me… Always on his terms, always when he’s free – he literally only messages every few days & then disappears… I’ve just spent a year with a guy I fell in love with doing the same, I mean, do I want to get sucked into that with this guy again? We talk a lot & sometimes have sort of phone sex or send pictures, not as much as I used to being that I am with Noodle & I really don’t want to jeopardise that.
However one day when I am on holidays, Noodle is also on holidays but playing his game of I’m not chatting for hours on end, that Rob Rob is messaging & says that he’s finished work that I should give him my address & he’ll come over. I tell him that I am not in the mood to see him, which is true & I am in gym gear, sweaty from the gym but he keeps persisting. He says that we won’t do anything (yeah right!) but he wants to meet me… I am so pissed off with Noodle right now that I am typing out my address before I can stop myself. Rob Rob says he’s on his way, he’ll be 40 minutes. I consider having a shower but I think fuck it, this guy can meet me as I am. I need to see other people, I’ve told Noodle at this point that I am seeing other people. So fuck him.
I see Rob Rob pull up & he has the same car as Noodle, FUCK. It scares me a bit, I think it is Noodle. A similar height guy gets out the car but he’s fairer than Noodle, so my heart stops pounding so hard when I realise it’s not Noodle but I still have to do a double take because they have a similar build, Rob Rob is probably a bit bigger than Noodle, but they are basically the same height, I can’t help but think, Fuck I really do have a type!
He looks smart in his trousers & shirt with a jacket, a bit formal I think but he has just come from work – it’s a suit & he looks good. I think I fucking should’ve showered. I’ve probably been talking to this guy on & off for 2+ years at this point & this is the first time we’re meeting face to face & I look like shit when he looks good!? FUCK… He knocks on the door leaning on the bricks with his hands in his pockets & I feel teeny tiny with him. He may even be a little taller than Noodle, he comes inside & we sit on the couch, I offer him a drink.
We talk about bullshit & mostly guys I’m fucking. He’s always keen to hear my stories about who I’m fucking & likes the details. This guy has seen me naked via video chat like a hundred times, but I’ve never felt more vulnerable than I do with him right now. I know I would want to fuck this guy – he has some weird pull on me too, not quite th same as Noodle, no one has a pull on me like Noodle does. I know Rob Rob wants to fuck me, that’s a given, why else would he drive 40 minutes to see me? Is it just married men that have that pull on me or is it their dominance & stature that draw me in? I mean Noodle is like my Edward Cullen from Twilight but Rob Rob is like my Jacob Black… I am stupidly addicted to both in very different ways, one more than the other, but fuck, I never thought of it like that before! Hahaha… (Yeah I love twilight btw!)
Rob Rob asks me to show him my toys, I know this isn’t a good idea but we go into my bedroom, I sit on the edge of the bed & open the draw of my bedside table to show him what’s in there. There are a lot of vibes & lotions, some other toys… He starts rubbing himself & I think fuck, I do want to do something with this guy but Noodle is in my head. I want this to be Noodle standing in front of me. I hate that. I feel sorry for him that Noodle is on my mind. But he doesn’t seem to notice; he unzips his fly & pulls out his cock. Obviously I’m very familiar with it over video chat, but in real life, at the height he is, right now, he’s basically at the perfect sucking height right now… I do think maybe I should suck it, that’s not that bad, is it? But I don’t. I don’t know how I restrain myself but I do. I don’t even touch it… I want too but I am now 100% loyal to Noodle, even though he’s treating me like an option right now & I said I would see other people, I don’t want to fuck things up. I know how jealous Noodle gets.
So fast forward a little to a few weeks after it ended with Noodle, Rob Rob & I talk on & off but we kind of back off a lot. I am totally still in love with Noodle & things are a bit better. But when that all comes crumbling down around me about Noodle & I know the things I know about Noodle & his partner, I need sex with someone else… I was waiting to fuck other people because I always thought Noodle would come back to me, but fuck it, I need to move on to stop picturing Noodle when I make myself cum – which hasn’t been that often either. FUCK. I’m actually also chatting to a guy from the anonymous app who is coming over tonight – a guy who you’ll read about soon (Crows), but when Crows tells me he’s not entirely single I think FFS, so he’s not going to be the distraction I need, so when Rob Rob says he’s home & that I should come over, I reluctantly agree…
I rock up at his house, wearing some sexy lingerie & a dress, I know he will appreciate what I look like… When he opens the door, I forgot how tall he is, I feel like an actual midget, even though I am in heels too. We walk in the door & he’s kissing me right away, this is the first man to kiss me since Noodle. It feels weird, but at least he’s a good kisser, he pushes me into a room which I am hoping it’s not their bedroom, I can’t really tell but there are clothes in the wardrobe & it does seem like a woman lives here – He tells me later it’s their spare room. I can’t believe that I am fucking another married guy, did I not learn my lesson? I mean there is no way I could fall for Rob Rob, he has kept the boundaries, I mean I don’t even think he knows my real name! (even to this day I don’t think he knows!)
He lifts my dress off over my head & then I am standing in my wedges & lingerie feeling anything but sexy. He looks at me with reassurance, pushing me to my knees to suck his cock, which I do & he calls me a good girl. I cringe because I used to hate it when a guy would call me that, but Rob Rob actually got me used to it in the beginning & within a few months with Noodle, he made me love it. I cringe because it’s the first time I’ve heard it since Noodle & it’s not from Noodle. Weirdly these 2 guys have a similar cock & he fits in my mouth, I like sucking a mans dick, so I enjoy him forcing himself in my mouth. He gets naked & pushes me on the bed, I lay there wondering if I can go through with this, but I look at him & realise I do want it. I just weirdly feel like I am cheating on Noodle with this guy. However, I must remember it is now over with Noodle, he is having crazy hot sexy with his partner that he used to have with me. I am clearly just a distant memory to the man I am so deeply in love with.
I obviously have to bring a condom with me, which is ok because clearly he won’t have any & mine are latex free ones, I prefer to use anyway… He fucks me for a while with him on top before we switch it up & I’m on top of him, riding his cock & rubbing my clit I actually cum while riding him – which surprises me, I didn’t think I would be able to cum with him but I do…. He tells me that he’s never cum with a condom on ever… Really ever? Surely not… But I mean that was pretty hot sex, of course he was going to cum. I mean, nothing compares to the sex I had with Noodle, but at least it was good!
Rob Rob & I don’t really talk much for a while & I never catch up with him again. He does his disappearing act as usual for weeks on end, I refuse to message him first as my usual thing. But then when he comes back online, he tells me that he & his wife have started swinging, that she fucked someone else! WTF dude! I really hate that I seem to just always be a fluffer for these men! I don’t know why this hurts me so much, but I feel like shit when he tells me. Again we stop talking for weeks maybe months. I am still reeling about Noodle, but now this woman is giving her partner what he wants, so I am no longer needed, even as a friend… I feel so used TBH. I am redundant with my own sex life!?