Back when I was online dating, a few years ago, it was only a matter of time before I start chatting to someone who looks so familiar (with my recent ‘We’ve fucked before’ episode – I am weary of people who look familiar, scared of who they might be) I think shit, did I sleep with this guy, is that where I know him from? You just never know where it could be from & it’s unsettling. Was it just someone I worked with or someone who was a customer or did I actually fuck them at some point?
We talk for a week or so talking about going out for a fancy dinner to a nice restaurant but we end up agreeing that we are not fancy restaurant people & settle for fish & chips on the beach but I tell him that I’d prefer chico rolls & chips on the beach which he says “Now you’re talking” but we don’t lock in a time as I’m away for work.
I finally decide to ask him where I might know him from, he says he agrees that I look familiar & so I try a process of elimination of places I’ve worked because he could’ve been a customer or maybe someone that worked with me & then it hits me, Foodland! I used to work at foodland (a supermarket chain in Adelaide) in the service deli from when I was in school till just before things ended with Boyfriend. He says yeah he worked there & so I ask which store did he work at & it turns out he worked at the same one that I had worked at. He mentioned the store manager (who was part of the reason of why I quit…) & we realised that we worked at the same Foodland at the same time. However at that time I was with Boyfriend & we just chatted as we passed each other, but nothing of real consequence.
I ask him if the fact we worked together makes him want to meet me more or less – I am unsure but he says more, however that would’ve been his in to ask me out, but he doesn’t take it. I do something that I never do, I ask him a few days later what he’s up to & he says ‘I’m thinking about you, is that cool?’ I mean sure dude, that is cool! It’s so sweet, but if that were really true, wouldn’t he have messaged me? Not the other way around?
Despite this, I feel myself getting attached to the chats with this guy (What is wrong with me?!) & we haven’t even met & he’s not really what I’d be normally attracted too, but I’m trying to take my friends advice & go out with different people. Clearly the people I am attracted to aren’t working out for me, so I’ll go out with people I find attractive but not entirely 100% my type & see what happens. Try new things! Yes this is what I should be doing, I will see what happens with this guy! I really want someone to make me laugh & I think this guy might be able to do that.
Funny thing happens, well really, this is my life, so it’s not unexpected, nor should I be surprised either or is it really all that funny, but I stop hearing from him… He knows I have come back from my work trip, I assumed that we were talking about catching up that coming weekend, yet I don’t hear from him at all, until the end of the weekend & I say that I’ve been out twice that weekend (which is so unlike me) but he says ‘Hagg’ I think he’s trying to make a joke, so I just brush over it but I don’t hear from him much again.
He kinda disappears, he messages me a few times but I don’t pursue him after the Hagg comment, so it kinda just ends, I don’t go online much when he is on there so he doesn’t message me.
I honestly don’t know what happens in these situations, I really don’t! If anyone can enlighten me, I’ll be happy to hear your theories…. When a guy just stops messaging & just ghosts you, what happens? I used to pretend that they died, because lets face it I can’t have that many men not interested in me & dating someone else…