T**y #2

Well… You didn’t think there’d be a T**y #2 did you? Neither did I to be honest. I felt so stupid & foolish… I never realised that someone else could make me feel so foolish! I only thought Silverlining would have that power over me. However I realise that it is me who makes me feel foolish, I fall for this bullshit, because while I am not a desperado, I am 100% lonely & I want a partner. Remember that I WANT a partner, I don’t NEED it. But for some reason nothing ever works out for me. I hate it…

So just also to clarify what the significance of T**y, here is the link to the Psychic Fair blog where a psychic told me that I would meet someone called T**y (I am not going to write the name here or in the previous blog either) however all you need to know at this point, is that a psychic told me I’d meet someone with this name – maybe that’s the reason why I went against my gut instinct & tried to meet him?! Or why whenever I see the name, I think this is the guy she was talking about! I don’t know…

I literally get home from the failed date – the stand-up – one of the most humiliating moments of my life & there is a message from T**y on my chat app… I don’t want to look at it! I don’t want to even see what this guy has to say but I can see a little of the conversation in the notifications that he is messaging that he got held up & is 5 minutes away, he asks where I am & that he’s 2 minutes away. He says that he didn’t see me in there. It’s almost 1:00 pm, I mean we were supposed to meet at 12:15 pm, does he really think I am just sitting there like a shag on a rock by myself waiting for him?! I click on the messages so he sees that I read them & ignore – how passive aggressive of me. I get some question marks, then I get his phone number asking me to call him… Hmmmm. No one is that quick to give out their phone number on these apps, so my wall starts to come down – his name is T**y after all, he could be the one she was talking about, however I am not calling him. I am still pissed & tell him that I felt like a wanker, that was the first time I have ever been stood up. I hate that I got dressed in a cute dress & looked good today! Fuck him. I’m going to make him feel bad!

He says that he had a flat battery after getting petrol, he had to get a jump start. He sends about 5 messages saying he’s sorry & he wants to make it up to me, that he’s sorry for making me feel shit, he wants to make it up to me & take me out for dinner… This is a lot of effort for someone he hasn’t even met?! Why do men do this? Is he really interested in me? Is this what being chased feels like!?

I am still angry so I say that he could have messaged me, like it’s not hard to send a text to say “my car is broken down, I’ll be 20 minutes. So sorry” but nope I get something 45 minutes after we’re supposed to meet. I knew my gut instinct was right & why I didn’t go in the pub because something wasn’t right about this guy. I send him a picture of how I look & say ‘pity for you I look amazing today’ he says that I do look hot & he did want to meet me, begging to see me, asking how he can make it up to me. That he feels bad etc. He sends me some pictures of him & OMG, he has a nice fucking body! Plus he’s fucking cute… FUCK… My vagina must control itself… Do not get wet, DO NOT GET WET! Hahaha… Lucky my head is still fucking angry & it’s not like it was with Noodle/SilverLining, that I would be angry & still be dripping wet when he sent me pictures…

I tell T**y that I have family dinner tonight so I can’t. This afternoon was all I had. He asks about after dinner that he’ll be at his house in the suburb close to me all night & I say that I am not going to his house, he says he’ll come to mine which I also laugh at, there is no way I am allowing him to come to my house. He says sorry profusely, then gives me his number again, which I say it’s probably best not to chat to me right now. He senses that I am still angry – of course I fucking am, I have just been stood up for the first time in my life! Even when he said he was 2 minutes away it still took him 15 minutes to message again to say he was there. I ask him if I was supposed to stick around for 45 minutes, he agrees he would be annoyed too. I tell him that this is why I don’t meet people off the chat app & why I haven’t met anyone new in a really long time. He says that he was stressing about getting there on time that he just forgot to message, he’s been out of the loop meeting girls for a while & is a bit rusty. I ask though “You’ve met humans right?! Like if you were meeting your mum for coffee & was late because of a battery being flat, you’d message her?” He agrees that he’s a ‘wanka’ for not messaging but he wants to make it up to me. He keeps telling me to call him, I tell him I won’t call him but I will text him & I will save his name as ‘chat app dick’ which I do, so when I send him a text I say that I don’t even know his name, which he tells me is T**y – same as what it is on the chat app, nothing weird lots of people with common names use their name on the app. I mean when I met Silverlining, he was using his real name too. T**y asks me to call him but I say I don’t have time, but he asks again & before I get a chance to reply, he’s calling! FUCK. I hate when people call…

Ok so to be honest, we chat easily but I don’t let him off easy even though his voice sounds so fucking cute it’s melting my icy exterior rapidly. Double fuck. We talk for about 20 minutes before my sister rocks up to my house – I’d recently learned some new skills to take up my time, instead of looking for boys to chat too online, I had done some beauty courses & started a new hobby, my sister was on her way to get her eyelashes done. But the whole time I am with her, I am thinking about T**y. He messages me instantly to tell me I sound hot, but I reply that he know what I look like, he’s seen pictures, but he says that I sound hot too… I sit there doing my sisters lashes, wondering if I am going to give this guy a second chance or not. Should I? I gave Silverlining a second chance, surely this guy deserves one too? Yes he made me feel like a fool & yes he was the first person to stand me up ever… Does he deserve a second chance? Should I meet him? Afterall the psychic said that I would meet someone named T**y & he would be good for me. Surely this is the man, I decided to give up on dating & this is what the higher being sent me?! Perhaps I should just meet him for one little drink… What harm could that do?!

#IBD4U