T-Bone

T-bone was around on the chat app from the very beginning. I actually always thought he was a chick because of his profile pic was of a pair of sunnies – everyone thought this, I never ever saw pictures of him. Everyone was always excited about him but he is so young that he doesn’t interest me – I am into Noodle from the very start of being in the chat groups. When I first saw a pic of T-bone, I see how skinny & lanky he is that I definitely am not interested & thought he’d never be interested in me anyway – being I’m a normal human sized chick, according to Noodle a perfect Marilyn Monroe body (I wish!). T-bone & I chat a little – never in private message, it is always in the group & we have good banter but there is nothing there for me. I have Noodle to occupy my time! I didn’t need this boy.

T-bone disappeared for ages, like months on the chat app! He is still in all the groups but no one knows what happened to him. I didn’t think much of it because people come & go so quickly, especially married guys when their partner finds out about them being on there (I’m waiting for the day Noodle ghosts me when she finds out!). But T-bone reappeared in a group & started chatting to me a lot. We finally start chatting in PM too. I don’t think much of it when he gets flirty, I was flirty back but was clear that I was seeing someone, he was also clear that he was seeing someone too, so I am not sure why he is back online. Why did I tell him I was seeing someone? I mean I can see other people, aren’t I still single? What the hell does that mean? Why would I say that…?! Everyone on the chat app are already suspicious of Noodle & I, why would I tell him that I am seeing someone.

One of the groups is planning a ‘meet up’ it is a group that I own so I am part of the planning. I had tried to get Noodle to attend this event. I even thought Noodle could drive into the city, he didn’t have to drink heaps. But he said he couldn’t come & he blamed work the next day, however, I’m pretty sure that he was worried about what his partner would say & also I’m not 100% sure how Noodle would go in a social situation anyway.

I’d been telling Noodle about this event, of course desperate for him to come along & had developed an alibi for him, but he refused to use it… He’d worked at so many stores recently, he could pretend he made friends with someone & that there were drinks in the city for someones birthday. Not entirely a lie… I really wanted Noodle there, I was dying for him to come out with me at some point, I know he wanted too, but he was cautious of using any alibi.

I was supposed to meet the other admin at the pub first then everyone was going to meet us later. But she bailed when I was already in the city, I had nothing to do but wait, so I go to the pub & start drinking. I end up becoming really good friends with one of the chicks from the group, the one that rocked up first. Everyone rocks up & we drink some more. We have the most annoying dude there talking about how many strippers he knows & that he could get us into club x. So somehow we end up there, I am so drunk when we walk in but apparently there are cheap shots. Yeah what a good idea!So, I’m also messaging T-bone, stupidly but as I’m standing at the bar, T-bone messages & says he’s also there, he comes in, he looks straight at me & walks over to me, not saying hello to anyone else, even though he probably knows them too. He buys some shooters to catch up which he gives me some. I am not good with shots & am drunk anyway, but I have a few at the strip club.

The annoying guy asks us all to put in money for a stripper to do a group thing, I say no, I’m not bi, I’m not even sure why I am here to be honest, most of the other chicks are bi so they are happy to put in but I say no. Not really sure what happens because we don’t get a table dance & we leave for the Woolshed (A night club in Adelaide that has been around forever however used to be really shit when I was younger but has turned into a cool place to go despite the decor never having changed in the 20 years it’s been open!)

At the Woolshed, I have a few more drinks, as if I need them! Why are people letting me drink!? Why aren’t I more restrained?! Jesus… This is not going to end well… What is wrong with me… I apparently punch the annoying guy in the nuts (WTF??) which everyone thinks was on purpose, but I am not a violent person & I don’t remember it, so who the hell knows what happened. I don’t think I would’ve just done it on purpose, someone said I was just swinging my arms around but who the fuck knows what happened!

Next minute, T-Bone is holding me up while I stumble around like a drunken teenager. Jesus… I’m not sure how it happens, if I kiss him or if he kisses me, but we kiss. For a while. I don’t think about what I am doing, how upset Noodle will be because he is so jealous of T-Bone because according to Noodle all the girls cream themselves over him. Noodle never believed me that I wasn’t into him & I’m not, I mean, he’s cute, but he’s like 10 years younger & super skinny. I like a man, plus this guy also has a girlfriend… Or so he says…

It’s time to go home, I briefly get a moment of clarity before I ask him to go home with me… Thank god I don’t ask him that! I mean, I can barely stand up. He & Sweetie (Max’s wife) get me in to the taxi. Luckily we drop him home, I kiss him goodbye & as the car takes off, I need to spew. I’m leaning out the door, Poor Sweetie gets an eye full of my ass hanging out the door as I chuck.

I wake up feeling like shit, not only in because I have drunk my weight in alcohol, but because I kissed another man…

I chat to T-Bone constantly the next day & for a few days later, but then he disappears again. Another chick said she was still chatting to him on snapchat, but I just try to wipe that from my memory. At least one thing I realised from that was how much I like Noodle, how much I didn’t want to hurt him, even though I am allowed to see other people. I really don’t want too.

I never told Noodle I was even chatting to T-Bone, let alone that I kiss him because I knew that he would be so jealous. I don’t feel guilty for doing it, I’m single, I can do whatever I want but I do feel guilty for not telling him. I’m always so scared someone is going to say something in the groups that they saw me kissing him, but no one ever did. Yet!? Phew!

#IBD4U