To celebrate 1500 likes on my FB page https://www.facebook.com/Ivebeendatingforyou/ – here is a bonus Noodle post!
The next morning, post T-bone (I suggest you read that post before reading this! It’s part of this story!) – FUCK! I feel like absolute shit! Not only from a ridiculous hangover that I haven’t had like this in years, in fact the whole time I’ve been seeing Noodle I’ve barely been drinking in case he wants to see me at short notice & I need to drive to see him, which is stupid but fuck I can’t help it. I feel shit from the fact I have kissed another guy – AGAIN! What is wrong with me, why aren’t I the loyal person I thought I was? To be honest, that disturbs me more that kissing or fucking other guys… I am not who I thought I was! I know I am midst affair here, but it’s not my affair, I’m not cheating on anyone & if it weren’t for that stupid agreement, I doubt that Noodle & I would be in this mess! But why do I keep doing this? But why am I like this, is it to test my feelings for Noodle? Is it because I self-sabotage? Am I too scared of being happy? I mean can I be happy with this man? Is that even possible in this situation?
Noodle messages me a good morning message – pretty much before I am waking up out of my drunken stupor, he’s at work asking how the night was. I am in 2 minds about telling him what really happened before someone in the group says something, should I just come clean about the kiss before someone says something or should I just hope to fucking god that no one says anything? I risk it & I just tell him I’m supremely hungover, that I drank too much & came home with Sweetie – not a lie… When he asks me to come see him that day for lunch, I say yes & I think that I will tell him in person – then he won’t get too jealous & I can reassure him how much I do like him & that is isn’t what I want, I can gauge his reaction rather than him just not replying to me after I tell him or him saying “I’ll live” which will make me feel even worse, if we’re together, I can kiss him better & make sure he is ok about it.
I consider private messaging some of the people in the group that were at the drinks thing, to ask them not to say anything, however I think that will draw more attention to it, not only will I have to admit that I’m fucking Noodle but I will have to ask them not to say anything to him & I actually think that it would make me want to say something more if I knew I couldn’t or was asked not to, it’s a bit too suspicious. Plus I know that some of these women are or were after Noodle too, so would they private message him & tell him about the kiss so that he ends it with me? I mean I remember when he got really upset that I didn’t tell him about the afternoon with Shark & Leblek. We weren’t really seeing each other exclusively then like we sort of are now, I guess, so I knew it would upset him so I didn’t tell him. Should I tell him about T-bone? Then if I tell him about this dude, should I tell him about Orbit? Should I just shut my trap & know that this guy is fucking his partner & it’s all part of the deal?! To use Noodle’s catch phrase?!
But I get to his work, I message him that I am there & when I see him walking towards my car, all manly & sexy even if his shirt is too big because he’s lost a lot of weight that I melt, when he gets in the car & he leans over & kisses me hello, I smile & I must have a stupid look on my face because he asks “What?” I reply “Nothing” & we drive off to find a spot. I can’t do it, I can’t tell him, I don’t want to hurt him, it kills me that I might hurt him – I’ve never hurt a guy before that I care about… We’re not exclusive obviously but I don’t want to hurt him… & I know that he will be so jealous & he will think he is not good enough for me. I know how he thinks. It seems so ridiculous to even say this knowing the situation we’re in but he is good enough for me, he is the one I truly see myself with! I don’t want to hurt him, I don’t want him to feel like he’s not good enough. So I decide that it’s best not to tell him & I just pray to god that no one in the group says anything.
I get away with it, phew. Noodle never mentions that he knows about the kiss, but it did take him ages to admit he knew about Shark & Leblek so maybe he’s just saving this to throw back in my face one day? I don’t know… I guess I’ll find out one day… Though weeks later, I am still freaking out every time someone in the group brings up that night – will they mention me kissing a boy? Thankfully, unless he reads my blog, I believe I got away with it. If he was told, I know he would say something eventually, he wouldn’t be able to help himself! He’d use it in some way against me when I get crabby about him fucking his partner… But he never mentions it.
We fuck that afternoon in the back of the car in the backstreets by his work. When I get home I am either feeling guilty or sexy that I send him some naughty pics to remind him how sexy we are together. I guess I do this a lot but he senses that something is up because he mentions that I don’t do that often while he’s at work just after he’s fucked me… SHIT.
Noodle tells me one day that “I’d much prefer you cumming the same time with me” Yeah I agree, I love when that happens & it’s happened a few times now, it kind of scares me a little but it also somehow feels amazing “Hmmmm… Fuck you, that made my clit tingle” I tell him that “It’s really hot & probably the most intimate thing I’ve ever done..” He agrees & says that it “Only happens every now & then.” But fuck when it does, it’s like the whole world stops, I look into his eyes while he’s looking into mine & we really connect, like nothing else exists…
The next day it’s Noodle’s birthday, I make sure I am awake early & message him first saying Happy birthday. It’s a Sunday & he’s not working today, so I am not sure when I am going to see him but I want too… He made the effort to see me for my birthday that I want to see him but of course it’ll be up to his schedule & if he goes to the gym tonight. My 2 weeks of annual leave are at an end, so I’m hoping he doesn’t go to the gym too late as I have to get up for work tomorrow, however he starts his annual leave for his brother’s wedding. At 10:00 pm, he messages me to tell me he is going to the gym, I tell him that I want to give him a birthday blowjob & that I am on my way. I know he is happy that I am going to see him today. I’m assuming there has been no sex from his partner. I meet him in the car at the gym, he hasn’t bothered to go inside. I jump straight into the back seat & kiss him as soon as he sits down. I’m rubbing him through his shorts & pulling them down as quickly as I can, he is hard straight away, like he even needs foreplay to make him hard around me?! Hahaha. I suck his cock till he is almost about to cum when he tells me that he wants me to fuck him. I get up & straddle his lap & we both make this noise as I slide his cock inside me, looking into each other’s eyes. I ride his cock till I’m cumming & he then flips me to lay on the back seat to fuck me, when I ask him to fuck my tits (which he loves when I ask him to do that) he wastes no time switching positions, making himself cum all over me. Afterwards, my favourite part, Noodle sits back while I remain laying on the backseat covered in his cum when he see it, he rubs it into my skin… I won’t shower when I get home, sleeping covered in his cum & I’ll remind him in the morning that I am dirty bitch still wearing his cum.
I tell Noodle that I love the way he looks & that I find him really sexy, but for some reason he seems to not believe me, the woman who’s been fucking him weekly for months & chatting to him daily, but when someone else tells him he seems to believe them instantly. Or even if his partner says something to him about how good he looks now. I say “I would’ve thought that it’d mean more coming from me that I think you’re sexy cos I can apparently have anyone I want & I choose you. But maybe I spoil you & tell you too much. I’ll stop” Noodle tells me all the time that I can have anyone I want, I of course don’t believe this nor is it true, otherwise I wouldn’t be in this predicament. Noodle sends me a picture of him flexing his arms in the gym mirror & tells me “No, keep thinking I’m sexy. My arms have gotten bigger hehe. Maybe I think they are sexy now. You were fucking me before I went to the gym tho” He’s right, I was, I remember being the one that was suggesting he go to the gym. “I thought you were pretty sexy before you went to the gym TBH… But you look better now too…” I’m reminded of his first profile picture & how much I liked him when I first even saw his face “Well you were dying to fuck me before… Your more touchy now tho…” Fuck am I? Must control those pesky hands “I wasn’t dying… Get a grip. I’m gonna stop touching you!” We both know this is a lie, but fuck he’s being an arrogant idiot as usual. Hahaha “Nooooo. Makes me feel good about going to the gym… And Sexy…. Ummm considering you were fucking a ton of people & had lots lined up, you were pretty keen” Ok, so Noodle is in this type of mood! “That’s what I mean… It should mean more from me! I don’t have to fuck you!” He doesn’t seem to realise that I choose him “Hmmm but you want to badly all the time. So it does I guess.” Finally he gets it. But then adds “I like the way you didn’t deny anything I just said. Must have been a good fuck for you.” So we’re going to go here… I need to stroke his ego, I know the type of mood he’s in but I’m also in a mood, hating that I constantly have to do this “What’s there to deny? I mean, if I do, you say pfft. & I was fucking others & had potential guys but not as many as you think.” His first reply makes me laugh “Pfft. Miss popular, you had couples lined up, other people on the chat app. All lined up to fuck you. Even arranged meetings that failed for a couple of them. So whatever!” OMG I can’t deal with this. “Yeah…? Well I’m single. Part of the deal” I know that he is going to hate that response “Haha Bitch. But didn’t arrange to meet me or fuck me… Poor me!” OMG, really! “No, I just rearrange my gym, my work, drive to your work, your home, your gym… Poor Noodle!” Fucking hell, we’re doing this are we? “Hehe, opps. Don’t make me feel special or anything!” So I keep going “I bought lingerie specially for them all too! Gave them all a key to my house! Let them fuck any hole or cum anywhere they want.” He tells me that I can reuse the lingerie for other guys & that Max had keys to my house “Max had my spare keys… I had those cut for you… Not that you believe that either!” I am sick of this fucking shit! I was careful not to give him keys someone else had, these were keys for him, I didn’t want him to have my spare keys, I wanted him to have his own keys, I knew he wouldn’t believe I did that, but I did think about how I’d feel if I was given keys other women had… So I got some cut for him, like the loser that I am, knowing he wouldn’t believe me. “Hmmm, really? They look pretty new… Hmmm I’d kiss you right now if I could!”