September & October 2025 – School Holidays
29 September 2025 – After radio silence since Thursday, on Monday, week one of school holidays around 9:30am – his now usual time to message me, he says “Good morning , how are you this week !” Which I finally get to be the one who ignores him. This is not a game I am playing, I am literally offline, (so I didn’t actually get it till later.) I hadn’t opened my snapchat all weekend & as much as it kills me not to click on his message now I have one, I swipe the notification away & forget it, I believe that I have turned off the notifications for Snapchat, so I was thinking that when I do log back on, there would be more than this one message from him…. BAHAHAHAHA #IBD4U, you are a comedian! He won’t message me if I don’t reply, he proved that multiple times recently & in the past, remember the ‘I’ll chat when I can’ message at the end of the second affair & I never heard from him again as he married her four days later… The week goes by & no other attempts are made to message me, call me, send me a message on the chat app, the anon app or contact me by even smoke signal, carrier pigeon, or any other method he has to reach out to me, email, text, coming over – he still has a key… Nothing!
02 October 2025 – His Facebook page keeps coming up as a suggested page for me, which is the only way I look at it now… Of course I look at it, because how can I not hahaha, & every time that I do, he’s fucking posted a minute ago, an hour ago or whenever – I know it’s him because he told me all about the words he uses for the algorithm so don’t fucking tell me it’s another admin, I tried to help him so many times with his page & he never took my advice, always knowing better – yet he always asked or talked about it like he wanted my approval.
Every time I open Facebook with him posting only minutes or hours ago, is like another petal falling (how are there petals left at this point!) so this is when I block the fucking page. Firstly, his wife doesn’t even interact with it to make sure that it makes money – he’s told me that, so why should I look at it to make him money for her fucking weight loss drugs?! Get fucked. I block it & I have never looked at it again, even to this day, I haven’t ever unblocked it.
Let’s delve into that train of thought for a moment – Obsidian used me, when his wife was fat calling her ‘a fat fuck‘ numerous times & she was starting a weight loss injection that makes her sick & sleep. Now she’s lost weight & adjusted to the medication, she’s not as sick & now has more energy because she’s not overweight, so now he doesn’t need me or want me, because I am in my fat era. This is why the excuses roll in daily from him, constantly & consistently. I guess like the excuses he used with her when she found out about me the first time, ‘it was just sex‘ or ‘she means nothing to me,’ he is just an excuse machine, shit you say when you are saving your own ass, never taking ownership of his actions & certainly not self-reflecting.
10 October 2025 – The second week of school holidays goes by, ironically, it’s not as hard as I thought it would be to not look at snapchat & message him. My job is evolving & being more busy now that I understand what they hired me for & the team understanding too. But FUCK I MISS HIM… I miss talking to him, I miss everything about our interactions, even if we didn’t see each other face to face a lot – I miss the sporadic phone calls, I even miss the sporadic texting… But I don’t miss being a time filler for him when he’s bored. We haven’t had sex for almost a two weeks, I miss his kiss, his touch, his smell… But I’ve made it almost the two weeks of the school holidays without talking to him, giving him time with his family, time he doesn’t have to think about me or worry about pissing me off…
I haven’t got notifications on, so all I know is there is one message from last Monday but surely he’s tried more than once to message me… I know he didn’t try on the first weekend as I still had notifications on, but he did send something on the first Monday. I don’t know what he tried on the following week. Then it was the long weekend, which he was away so he wouldn’t have messaged for those four days… It is now the end of the school holidays, so two weeks since I said that I would talk to him after the school holidays, I think about messaging, but I don’t, I don’t even open up snapchat so my activity indicator doesn’t turn green. I am not close with anyone at work so can’t really talk to anyone there about it, I can’t talk to friends because none of them know I’m even talking to him or this version of the affair was even happening. I feel like Obsidian does when it comes to me… No one in his life knows about me, so he never gets to talk about me…
I think that perhaps he’ll come back online on this weekend – the last weekend of the school holidays, surely he hasn’t got a third weekend off in a row & I’ve lost track of her weekends on & off now so I have no idea if she’s at work or not. If not, I guess he’ll message on Monday, school is back, if they don’t have a pupil free day, I guess… I know she’ll go to work around 11:00am, & so he’ll message after that, if he’s at work it’ll be after 12:00pm when he’s home…
But what do you know, on the Friday before school goes back – A FUCKING GOD DAMN FRIDAY, when Friday’s are the day he isn’t able to fucking even log on to snapchat to say a simple hello when things were going south, let alone to chat to me at all, he fucking messages me, “Just checking in and saying hi 😅.” ARE YOU FUCKING JOKING ME?! Honestly, this is a sick joke, right? This can’t be real… For those not understanding my fucking abhorrence here, its because Obsidian has actively stopped messaging me on Fridays because he couldn’t possibly be more than two paces from his wife all fucking day, having obviously asked for Fridays off now & cannot cheekily message me like he used to on some other device other than his phone – which he says he doesn’t use around her anymore because she knows that’s what he used to cheat with, now he has to be completely offline all day on Friday’s – even when she is getting her lashes done every three weeks… So nothing fucks me off more that he chose this day of the week to ‘check in’. Why the fuck is he messaging me on a fucking Friday like a fucking asshole cunt!! How can he honestly be so fucking dumb?
Also, what else upsets me, is that the fucking notifications are clearly not off, if I got a notification today of him typing, then that means that he has not tried to message me more than these two messages in the last two weeks… I guess I prepare myself that when I do open snapchat, there will only be two messages in two weeks from him… Two messages! Fuck. I think that hurts more than anything… A petal detaches from the stem, falling in a fluttering silence.
13 October 2025 – Once I have had a break from Snapchat & gotten back some of my dignity from being used by Obsidian, so many times over the years, I log on, I turn my notifications & location back on & read his two heartfelt caring messages. Just two. (I wrote about them when I saw them, but I’ve added them to their own dated entries) Remember my life isn’t a romantic comedy & he’s not chasing me anymore because he’s got what he wanted – he got me to fill the time while his wife was sick & adjusting to Wegovy, he got me to boost his ego while he was feeling low & fat, now she’s skinny & giving him attention, he has his weights bench, so now he can discard me. What do you need a fat mistress for when you have a skinny wife?
I decide that being we haven’t seen each other in over three weeks now, when I made our last ‘chill hang out’ about sex because I knew I was just sex to him, it’s impossible for us to be more & we also haven’t spoken or messaged in two weeks – with no real attempts to contact me anywhere on any other platform, that I would get notifications for, that we are truly Obsidian & #IBD4U. So I send on Monday morning, “Hey, looking forward to catching up for Oct. Let me know when you’re free… 😊.” Trying to keep it light & non-committal. But he never comes back online even though Monday’s she works late so he has more time. Again, he doesn’t come back on snapchat at all, this time I notice the stupid green online-in-the-last-24-hours dot, it never comes on, not once for him.
#IBD4U
I've Been Dating For You 