Creep

I usually write as things happen & post in retrospectively, because nothing is happening, my life is pretty boring, here is a recent story. My life consists of work, sleep, eat, repeat. There is no real dating or talking to new men – old ones keep popping up, but there’s no new juicy stories, nothing exciting has been happening. So the other Saturday night, 9 March, I am in bed with the dogs when I get a text message at 10:15pm saying “Hey hey how you doing whats going on tonight??” I think about what I should reply, I don’t have the number saved in my phone. I am in a sassy mood, so not about to stuff around with a reply that tells them that I am good and apologises for not having their number in my phone etc, so I just say “Who is this?” They reply “Ahhh Creep lol” Righto, so he actually says his name, which is slightly obscure so I think, who the fuck is this?

My sass makes me reply “And who do you think I am?”  as I don’t know anyone with that name, I can’t even remember a time I have met anyone with that name or have heard anyone talk about someone with that name. When he replies “Honestly I have no idea whos number this is I’m just board and trying to do anything other than think about my ex haha” then I get “I apologise” Jeez mate, let it all out!

“Oh awesome… It’s just what every woman wants – to be a rebound for someone hung up on their ex.” Like I cannot wait to be yet another option for a guy, who will probably just go back to their ex in the end anyway! He replies with 3 messages “Hahaha yeah dream boat. Lol. On the plus side you are a woman haha.” This can’t be a random wrong number or a random ‘I typed numbers in my phone & just happened to get someone of the opposite sex.’ I think this is bullshit. This person knows who I am & is backing away because I don’t know who they are… “And I was just sitting here at 10:25pm thinking I’m looking for a red flag… Well you found me.” I get a quick succession of texts back “Hahaha. Are you busy? At 10:25. Lol. I’m sorry for bothering you.” Like why say that if you clearly started me messaging me late at night, when you probably know who I am & seemingly hoping for a booty call. 10 minutes later when I haven’t replied, I get a topless torso picture followed by “This is me lol might aswell make a real jack ass of my self lol” OMG. He’s a white slim guy with defined pecs that are a little hairy. My first reaction is that I don’t remember this person – so I haven’t fucked him before. I also inspect the background which isn’t much, he’s taking up most of the photo however I can sort of tell he’s in a bathroom & it may be that there are kids toys in the bath. It’s very hard to tell. Is this another married guy? Or seemingly recently separated?

“ok can I be honest with you because YOLO??” Oh here we go, I actually reply ‘sure’ & he asks if I am single because if not he’ll leave me alone, no dramas at all. I tell him that I am single & he says cool. OMG, this guy is annoying. I ask “So what do you have to be honest about??” because clearly he isn’t going to offer up this information now. “I’ve met you before and think your cute but have not been single until recently…” As if we didn’t see that coming, that this guy knows who I am… But where the fuck from?! I never give out my number! “Where?” I do not know anyone with his name, “We’ve met only very briefly. Though a friend of mine.” Even more unbelievable because I haven’t been out in forever & I haven’t been introduced to anyone recently through a friend. “And I gave you my number??” because I know for a fucking fact that I did not give my number out… When he says that he asked for my number, I don’t even think about this guy that I met a few weeks back at my work drinks – I barely spoke to the guy but the next day my boss says something about his mate asking him for my number. My boss said he was a bit of a player, so he said if he was a nice guy he would’ve but I said he was probably too young for me anyway. I didn’t even remember that till I started writing this post so it can’t be that guy, but that’s the only ‘friend of a friend’ meeting that I’ve had in forever, like years. So I ask where & he says though work. I ask where, but I started a new job & have been using my personal number until I asked for a work number, but this is my personal number not work number & I don’t recall a friend introducing me to someone though work… WHAT? Is it though a friend or work? “I’m overstepping boundaries id say. Lol” Yeah I’ll say, because you’re being evasive & creepy. I ask where again & he says “I done some work at your place a while back… Like I said yolo.” Ummmm… WTF!

Firstly, my reno finished almost a year ago, I haven’t had tradies at my house in a long time. Most of the guys who did work for me that would have my number are saved in my phone because I was contacting them a lot at the time, except for those who worked for someone/company. So why isn’t this guy in my phone?! How did he get my number if I didn’t give it to him… I mentally go through all the tradies who worked here thinking who it could be, a few who did work here, I didn’t have their numbers because they weren’t the main contact of the job… So clearly this guy isn’t a company owner.

I ask what work to narrow it down & I get “lol I’m really not sure I should say” Well that’s even more fucking creepy, what type of fuckwit says at 11:09pm that they’ve been to your house & won’t tell you who they are? WHAT A FUCKING CREEP. I can’t help but think, is this guy out the front of my house right now texting me? I just get that vibe (& doesn’t help that all my tiktoks on my FYP are 911 calls.) so I check my front camera to see if there is anyone out there, I would fucking freak if there was, but there wasn’t. So lets just relax & probe this guy for an answer.

“Can I just say construction works… are you mad cos if so I’m really sorry.” Um, I’m not mad, but I’m fucking freaked out… What is wrong with this person? Did he really do work at my house? Seems a bit to much of a coincidence to not be true. “Either you did work at my house or you didn’t…  What work?” This is just pissing me off. “I’m sorry.. I shouldn’t have done this.” I bet this is just late night drunk, rebound texting but it’s fucking creepy. “Yeah particularly if your not going to say, you’re just a creep now.” It’s making me uncomfortable, I keep checking my camera, is this guy just going to rock up?

“That’s fair…worse case you tell my company and I lose my job… should I say??.. I guess I’ve come this far id prefer you know so at least you know who this creep is…” hmmm “i’m not a creep just saying lol. Ok so like I said I only met you very briefly.” I just send back the hand smacking the head emoji because he’s already said that shit… Why can’t he just say, clearly he’s just gone through the work computer & found my details… So many things wrong with that, first it’s been a year since I had work done, so did he get it back then or has been though the computer to find it? How long has he had it? I must’ve made an impression to get a message a year later & risk losing his job over. It’s not like he found me on facebook or found me Instagram or even tiktok, he’s actually got my number. So perhaps the owner gave it to him? I mean I’m not sure I’m comfortable with that either – the fact someone I gave my number as a customer, its such a breech of privacy. However, if his boss gave him my number, then he woudn’t be worried about me telling his company, right?

“Ok ok im sorry so id see you when doing concreting at your place I asked my mate for your number you, you seemed nice and I thought you looked good in your gym gear… I apologise” Rightio, that was the biggest job with the most number of tradies here! So that doesn’t narrow it down much, probably to about 20 guys, however they were all mainly Filipino as the owner is Filipino. This guy is white, so that narrows it down a bit further, but I only really dealt with the owner, I don’t really remember talking to anyone else & definitely don’t remember any of their faces! Also does he mean ‘his mate’ as in his boss, because the owner of that company is the only one I think I gave my number too. But then why is he scared I’ll tell the company & get him fired?!

I tell him I have no idea who he is as there were so many concreters here during that time. “hahaha fair call. I was the handsome one” I actually laugh out loud at that, I mean that’s pretty funny. “Are you going to tell my boss??” Um, should I?? “I can show my face but I don’t think you will remember me. We met very briefly.” I get a picture of his face, he’s a bit of a wranger & looks about 25-30 years old, “u would not remember me lol.” So thinking back, there was a bit of a older guy who was a wranger that was sort of more in charge than the others, I talked with him a little but don’t really remember. That guy wore a legionnaire hat, seemed a bit straight laced, not at all the type to send a shirtless picture to a random. Is this the same guy?!

I also need to go back to the gym clothes comment, because I didn’t know what work he was doing, I couldn’t work out when he would have seen me in gym clothes, because not a lot of the tradies worked weekends or late nights, so I can’t even think when I would be in gym gear during the day? In fact most mornings they rocked up, I was in my fucking oodie & uggs!! So I really don’t know how or when he would’ve seen me in gym gear… & why do guys love gym gear so much?

As I am not really attracted to his face – perhaps because of the creepy way he’s gone about getting my number, because I sure are shit didn’t give it to him & the way he’s revealed what he did at my house, being so coy & evasive about it, paired with my sassy mood, I tell him that I don’t remember him because I had tradies coming & going for about a year. I am about to tell him that I am too old for him/he’s too young for me, which would probably cue the ‘older women are hot’ type comments, but it’ll get me out of this easier… But before I can, he writes “hahaha. Would you like to get to know each other im 39. It’s late now but I mean in general. That’s ok if not.” Yeah it’s 12:23am mate, certainly not now & I hate myself that I got invested in this! “Get over your ex. Be single. Then you can text randoms you do work for.” Fuck I’m in a bitchy mood! Hahaha… But seriously, when am I going to get an emotionally available guy, not just the crumbs of a man still hung up on his ex? “haha that’s good advice.. not something I’ve done before..i’ve not been single in so long.. all good thx for entertaining my stupidity lol”  I don’t know if I should write back, I probably should leave it but I don’t, somehow I choose me & have some self-esteem, like it or not, but I say “I’m not a rebound. I’m the main event. So best sort yourself out.”  Honestly, I am sick of being treated like this by men, usually I would have kept trying to text him & probably would have tried to meet up with him, only to have him go back to his ex anyway, just as I get attached.

“Oh sorry I’m a dick…you are for sure the main event like I said I seen your gym gear haha and you got it going on house wise nice place dogs etc… I’m for sure trying to self out I don’t have a lot of friends due to ex.. I like you honest short sweet advice…” Um… Are you feeling more creeped out after that message like me? “It’s very late.. think about having a coffee sometime with me I’d really like some one to talk to and I’d like to get to know the main event.”  Yeah I don’t know how I feel about that, but I certainly don’t feel good… I put my phone down & go to sleep, it is almost 1:00am after all…

The next morning, I wake up & look at his messages, I am still in a sass – this whole interaction was not flattering, this is just fucking weird… I also have the fleeting thought, that he’s seemingly lost everything with his ex & knows I have a nice house, is he after my money?! (Well actually my debt because I have no money!) It would be very different if we had a flirty interaction when I supposedly met him & then he got my number from his boss or whatever, text me being upfront about how we met & how he got my number. But I don’t remember even talking to this guy & he’s invaded my privacy getting my number from work, he’s lied (not the first guy ever to lie to me!) but then his super creepy way of telling me who he is, making me actually a little paranoid being he knows when I live… The whole interaction has made me feel uncomfortable. I mean I know I am not safe in my forever home due to other factors that are my own fault, as you may know if you’re a long time reader, but this just adds to it.

I decide to write back to be the ultimate bitch & get rid of him “I’m not a counsellor.”  I don’t want to get to know someone so he has someone to talk to about his ex. Fuck off… I cannot stand the ex talk, especially from someone you don’t know. I also don’t want to be contacted because he’s got no friends & needs someone to talk too. Get on tinder dude & find someone, this is honestly they oddest way to make friends. “Hay the morning after the night before..yeah totally get it haha. I’d pay for your sessions haha…” Um What the actual fuck? “Sorry not funny I know.”  I don’t write back to those messages & that’s seemingly the end. It was not funny. I am not amused.

Ironically telling some friends about this story & a couple of them, I think one was my mum, said that this guy stuck his neck out to find me, a year later, that I should be flattered & give him a go. Really?! Like really?! I just don’t see it the same way… Maybe I’ve been listening to too many 911 calls on tiktok to believe that I will be safe with this guy & not end up buried under some concrete he lays on a daily basis… What do you think? Was I too harsh? Or was this completely as fucked up as I think it was?

#IBD4U