Trainer #2

So I didn’t know what would happen after that night, I didn’t know that he had messaged the Director at 2:00am saying he had a disagreement & that he quit. Hindsight is wonderful, I mean, if I hadn’t listened to this new guy bitch about the company that I was enjoying working for, for the last three hours & if I was more drunk or even perhaps more sober, I would have got him to come back inside & just go to bed in the spare room, talk it over in the morning? If I had of known I’d be the one thrown under the bus, I would have done things a lot differently.

My boss calls me Saturday morning & I run through what happened, briefly & not trying to make a big deal about it, I didn’t do anything wrong – did I? I decide to message Trainer & say that I hope his head doesn’t hurt too much & that he’s ok, but he never reads it. Late in the afternoon, my boss messages me to tell me that Trainer is going to go on the planned business trip on Monday & that he would be reporting to him & that I am not to contact him. I say no worries.

I should also say that this whole week with my boss here, he has be singing my praises etc, when I had the quarterly performance review with my other manager, he said he wanted me on his team full time, that he was really impressed with my initiative & that it’s rare for someone to meet their budget within the first 3 months, but I was doing really well. I had no reason to be worried, I finally feel like I fit in & I feel like this industry is where I have found a passion.

Now having said that, there were lots of red flags with the company too, but like any job, when you’re in the “in crowd” or you’re dating someone ‘you really like’, you sort of turn a blind eye to things. You don’t think about the fact you gave up your Mothers Day to pick someone up from the airport and take them somewhere. You don’t think about the lack of support when you had to fire someone, even the Director of the other part of the company – I had someone online & that was it. You don’t think about the time you fell over at home & dislocated your shoulder & didn’t take any time off at all. You don’t think about the public holidays in SA when it was a holiday in QLD and your bosses called you, you just answer, when you should have ignored it. You don’t think about the fact your dad gives up a day over Easter with you to mount some TV’s & do some other odd jobs, when you should’ve made them pay for a handyman. I always go all in with jobs & I really give everything to my work, I focus because I only have the dogs & I would rather focus on work than dropkick boys… Clearly I have poor judgement.

So Monday is a public holiday, I get a notification that Trainer has used the company Uber account to get to the airport. Well that’s good he’s gone on the work trip, that gives us a week to just reflect on what happened. My boss messages me & asks for a report about what happened Friday. I write back Tuesday morning saying lets not make a big deal out of it. I figure if Trainer went away, I don’t want to get him fired. We can be adults, besides he said multiple times that he can separate work and his personal life so when he gets back it’ll be ok, I won’t be his manager soon.

Even though there was an organisational change happening, I wasn’t looking for other jobs, but I’m not going to lie that I had a look around to see what’s out there. I would apply for things I really wanted but I wouldn’t be applying for anything and everything, I wasn’t desperate to leave but I wanted more than what this company could offer, but I wanted to get more experience for my resume in this industry also. I figured eventually either he would leave or I would, I was sure of that, I just didn’t know when. I figured once I’m in the other role full time, I won’t be in the office as much as I have been either, as I won’t be managing the staff, I’ll be out meeting with clients and probably work from home a little bit more too.

Later on Tuesday my boss texts me & asks for the report anyway, I figure that it’s going to be used to performance manage Trainer, so I word very casually & they asked for the messages, so I sent them also. Again, I figure that if you read those messages, anyone can see that I didn’t invite this interaction, besides allowing him to come to my house. I’m not saying I’m innocent – not at all & I am sort of expecting a written warning or something, even though my boss basically said it was ok that morning. So I hit send on this casual report – kicking myself I didn’t keep a copy.

On the way home Tuesday, I get a work email, which I don’t look at because I am driving, when I get home I look at my phone but my emails are asking for my password. I put it in but it says it’s incorrect. I look it up & try a few more times. Incorrect. I have taken to leaving my work computer at the office, sick of working for hours when I get home only to be demoted, so I fire up my personal computer & log on to the company schedule, which is a web based program & it works but my emails still don’t on my phone. Weird, but I figure I’ll just get IT to look at it in the morning, perhaps because it’s my personal phone it’s been logged out or something. There is always IT crap going on at this workplace.

It’s almost an hour drive to work everyday, which starting at 7:30 am everyday, has been taking it’s toll. It’s exactly 7:30am when my phone rings, I am driving, I answer on the steering wheel, it’s my boss, I am instantly suspicious when I realise he’s using my personal number. He says hello & say’s he just going to connect HR. I know what this means… They advise me that they are not going ahead with my probation & I say “Are you serious?” They say yes & because I am caught so off guard I start to fight for my job, even the other part that I am going to be doing full time soon. I ask if it’s about what happened Friday, they say no, I ask what is the reason & the HR lady – who is also an owner just snaps “#IBD4U, what happened Friday was inappropriate, but your not the right fit for the company & your probation has ended.” I hang up. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK.

I am driving! To work! Is that the most inappropriate way to fire someone?! At least make a meeting with me when I arrive. Or why didn’t they do it last night when they clearly shut off my emails? I think about pulling over, leaving the key in the car on the side of the road & walking away. But I don’t want to be charged some fee by them, so I am less than a minute away from the office, I pull into the work carpark & see the receptionist on her mobile outside, they are telling her. I walk in, advise the staff I have been fired & pack up what is left of my desk, trying to remember what is mine & not to leave anything behind. The staff are all seemingly very surprised & I catch an uber home on their dime. I am so shocked.

I think what fucks me off the most is there is no feedback, like I asked if this was because of Friday & they say no. They won’t elaborate as to why, so my overthinking brain just goes into every scenario. I am also so disappointed that if there were problems/issues or concerns with my performance, why hadn’t they addressed it & had meetings with me so I knew what I was doing wrong & could change my management style? I’d been there five months & had not had one negative thing said to me from my management, I had not had a manager come to SA to support me being they knew this role & managing people would be something I would need developing and support.

Instead they just tell me over & over again that I am doing well & then fire me for what? I guess I will never know why, just like the previous job who did the exact same thing. The previous company, unclear what they want when employing me, then getting annoyed when I don’t hit the unachievable targets. I think this company were unsure what they wanted in SA, obviously as they employed me for one thing, then gave me two jobs to do, then they saw an opportunity to restructure when people left the organisation. I wasn’t the only one demoted, my counterpart in QLD was demoted also, so I highly doubt he’ll stick around, however neither of us got an opportunity to apply for the new national role & the job ad was not at all what they told me they were looking for.

& lets not forget Trainer… He is still working there to this day! He was the inappropriate one, he told me he wanted to kiss me at the fucking office… How is he still working there?! I did sort of expect to hear from him when he got back from his trip. But it is obvious that he threw me under the bus, while I was trying to save him, otherwise both of us would have been fired. I guess they need the lackies more than they need management, so I would say he’s on borrowed time, or honestly, a company that is owned by women is the most sexist company I have ever worked for…

What do you think? Do you think I was fired because I let a staff member come to my house?

#IBD4U