Marvel #22

July 2024

While I am looking for work, it’s almost been a month of unemployment – again & I am sending out so many resumes & not even getting any calls at all. I am at an all-time low, I know I’ve said this before but this is just fucked. I have basically been looking for a job for a whole year due to the circumstances! Marvel asks how it’s all going & I say that it’s fucked & remind him that he thought he was the loser when he got made redundant. At least his was a genuine redundancy, my unemployment has been because my last two employers didn’t pass my probation for whatever fucked reason & I genuinely have no idea why, I can only speculate. But I am seemingly shit at work so I’m fired time & time again, I have no boyfriend & no prospects… I have no family (kids), I don’t have a lot of friends anymore. I am genuinely a loser. This is really an all time low in my life.

We talk about fucking in the car, which he says that he’s “dying” to do again, in public & in a confined space is hot. I agree & tell him he could come to my work, I am doing some temp work which I am earning half what I usually earn as a receptionist – I have no idea where we would even go but the idea is amazing & sexy. As a receptionist I am bored out of my mind & all the temp jobs I work at during this time, want to keep me (probably because they know I am worth double what they are paying & they are getting someone motivated to want to work.)

I have also been watching a bit of porn lately, I guess boredom of the unemployment, will do that to you. I’ve been looking at dry humping videos which really surprise Marvel but when I show him what I’ve been looking at, we have the longest conversation that we’ve had in a long time, albiet it’s all about sex & me waking him up riding his cock, but it goes on for a few days. What’s interesting about that, is I know sex sells, I’ve used it as a tool to get men to like me/want to be with me ever since I started having sex, Marvel is no different, the only way to keep his attention is through sex. No one wants the boring stuff.

Marvel says if he was asleep next to me & I woke him up by riding his cock, he’d pretend to be asleep for as long as possible to savour the moment. But he says that he wouldn’t be asleep for long. We talk about our most fucked up fantasies, I think mine is still the intruder fantasy, which he says isn’t weird but I think that’s just because we both have that fantasy. He tells me about a kidnapping fantasy which he’s never told me about before. He doesn’t have a van but would like to kidnap me then fuck me in the van with my mouth duct taped & hands cable tied. I think that is so hot, a little fucked up but remember it is consensual… & it’s just a fantasy not something either us would do in real life without consent.

Because it’s school holidays we don’t see each other but I am surprised at how regularly he is coming online, mainly I think to finish this conversation of sexy talk being that the night before I’d cum while chatting to him & showed him a picture of my sticky cum on my fingers. It’s weird when he talks consistently, he hasn’t done this in so long that it’s disconcerting. But I stupidly love it & want him to keep coming back online, so I keep the sex talk going, not bringing the conversation down with my unemployed loser life. But sex is the inky thing that keeps him coming back. He’s treating me like he does give a fuck about me, not just as a fuck buddy as someone you don’t need to bother treating with respect. But how tragic that I can’t show my true feelings to keep him interested, who am I kidding, he doesn’t respect or care about me. Yet, these type of multi day in a row conversations remind me of the good old times of the affair number one when he not only put in effort but he made me feel like I mattered to him.

When he rocks up at my house, we’ve had almost 2 weeks of consistent sexy chats that I am feeling sexy & wanted, I put on lingerie & my long knee high boots. I tell him that he knows where to find me. I am in my room waiting for him when he arrives. Because we’ve talked about it a lot, I make him sit in the chair & watch me use my vibe before I allow him to fuck me. We kiss passionately & I suck his dick while my vibe is still on me, making me grind against it. It’s hot & sexy.

Post coital, I tell him about Referee & how he’s offered me $2500 to fuck him. Marvel is surprisingly on board with me doing it, he even encourages it knowing I need the money & says that he would do it.  Marvel even suggests that I could maybe set it up to be the 3sum I’ve always wanted & get paid for it? Maybe Referee would enjoy watching me be fucked by Marvel. If it was easier to set things up with Marvel, I would have 100% done it with him, but we’ve not been able to set it up this whole time, so I don’t think it’s ever going to happen. Now that I have Marvel’s blessing, could I do it? I really don’t want too & if you’ve read the Referee story you know I don’t end up doing it.

Of course, though after the days & days of talking leading up to us fucking. I get 3 messages from Marvel before he logs off & waits for 5 fucking days to talk to me again. I shouldn’t be surprised at this, he gives me a little, gives me what he wants when he wants, then gets what he wants when he wants, then pulls back. He’s done it for years & this is why I just have to shut those feelings down… I am just here for the ride. I get no say as usual but that’s my fault, not his.

#IBD4U