June 2025 – Forrest Fuck
19 June 2025 – I wake up to see that he said yes that he did restore our snapstreak & he paid to do it too… I smile like a waker at that. Why was it so easy to let his guard down when he started this, after reading my blog, but now he he’s putting it back up? All he needs to do is show me that I mean something to him, rather than leaving me hanging for 18 hours for him to come back online…
He comes to my work for lunch, we go to the tavern & we sit opposite each other, I guess this is what happens with relationships after a while, you grow distant with each other… Didn’t think it would happen after only ten dates. I guess it has been eight years. I have booked an hour with him, so I have to work later to make up the time, the last 10 – 15 minutes of our date are at his car, he is worring about his rego & that he doesn’t have any money to pay but his car is unregistered & he normally only drives five minutes so he steals money out of his kids account to register his car & he just makes me feel like this is not worth it… I stand there while he plays with his phone transferring money around, thinking I have to work later for this?! We barely text as he is going offline between 3:00pm & 4:00pm everyday now, that I say to his ‘hopefully chat later‘ message, “Yeah, sorry. I don’t think you should come to my work anymore.”
20 June 2025 – The next day, because of course he can’t come online at night anymore, he asks why in the morning. I mean does he really need to ask that?! “Because I walk away feeling shit. You remind me how far it is & that it’s your only day to do stuff & you use that time for me. You had no money but had to register your car making me feel even worse because you came down. I’d just prefer not to walk away feeling awful.” I’d just rather not bother. I tell him it’s not worth it & he says “It is worth it. Stop being fucking dumb. Haha I even had to fill up with petrol just to see you 😛 But so worth it. You have never asked me to see you at work … i do it myself … You are so worth 90k round trip ! Having a lunch date is worth it. I wanted to get outside and hold uou and give you a proper kiss before I left 😕 And decent hug. And you want to know the most fucked thing we when spend time together. Time goes so fast, a lunch date feels like 15 mins. A day s. Date feels like 2 hours …” I never complain that I drive 20 minutes each way for a strict 30 minute break with him– I may complain about other things, but not the drive to see him. I even take him fucking food that I’ve cooked & warmed up, wrapping it it an tea towel so it’s hot for him so he gets a yummy hot meal, I take snacks & drinks… I just get him bitching about rego or petrol or the car service, then the distance & time he doesn’t have – THEN DON’T FUCKING COME, I never asked for it & I don’t want to keep feeling like shit every fucking time he comes to my work! “But you are so worth it, let me come see you for lunch.”
21 June 2025 – He hasn’t admitted that he isn’t working today, a Saturday until he tells me that his daughter has birthday parties today & they are all going to them, I say goodbye after waiting two hours from 8:10am for his reply, him disappearing mid conversation. He sends two cheeky messages at 12:30pm & 5:00pm to tell me he is thinking of me, asks me a question & never logs back online to read my response… Good one!
22 June 2025 – I try not to be pissed, I am not going to message with a pissed off ‘crazy’ message as he says, this is what he wants, fine. This is what he gets. Guess what? I bet you can’t guess what he says when he logs on? “I fell asleep early last night 😕 I was going to try and message you.” Yeah ok. He tells me about a post on his page about twisites & cheezels, saying that cheezels are winning, I just say that there wasn’t ever any doubt. He goes offline for the day & comes back, & we talk about my gym closing – don’t even get me started on that story & then he says goodnight.
23 June 2025 – He pulls out of the podcast, having only recorded two episodes “I just pulled out of the Podcast….. haha I was too scared to listen to our first episode. the interview was good…. but the actual episode sucked. she talks like shes talking to children and I just don’t think Ican do that. introducing the second episode of the singer… and it just felt so fucking lame the entire episode, plus I did all the fuckin research. Im thinking to myself, the dude just writes fucking kids song, his favourite food isnt fuckin apples haha. we also had no chemisty and I think our age gap was just too much. People allready are dicks on social media, and I just simply did not want to a do podcast where the other hosts talks to the audience like they are 6 year children.” Well that’s fair enough, I know how hard it is to find someone to do a podcast with. Honestly, I would love to do one with Phoenix. Ironically that’s the longest mesaage he’s sent me in months…
He asks if I am ringing him for lunch & when I try to call he doesn’t answer – awesome! When he calls back, he tells me where I can listen to the podcast, they have two episodes up & it’s not as bad as he thinks it is but she is pretty cringy, it’s hard not to judge her based on the things that he has said to me, because I am always going to side with him, but it’s definitely not that bad…
We talk about my internet speed & I notice when I am chatting about something that he is interested in or has an opinion on, he doesn’t shut up, I get many messages & screenshots of different internet providers. I also have an interview tomorrow for this job with no job title, so I am going to call in sick tomorrow. I was going to fake a flat tyre or car trouble, but I would be in corporate clothes with make up on so it might be a bit suss. It’s just easier to call in sick. Not like everyone else doesn’t do it too. I ask him if he wants to see me tomorrow after the interview at 9:00am, I’ll be home around 11:00am but I can meet him down his way, & I wait for him to say he’s going to be busy but he says, “It’s a pity it’s raining tommoelw w. We could of had a mini lunch date and done some geo cache hunting.” Well we decide to suss it depending on what time I get back from the interview.
24 June 2025 – Today he says “No sex?” & I say no, that I am not a piece of vagina meat. When he says that it’s been like a week, I say that it’s actually been two weeks since we last had sex. He says that he thought it was only a week, I say “Wasn’t with me… 🤷🏼♀️” Great, just what I need today, the day of my interview is to think about Phoenix & his wife fucking more than we do, now he’s just confirmed it, considering he doesn’t deny it like usual, saying something about them hardly ever having sex… Oh good, even better…
I have re-published my blog, because maybe that will make him talk to me more? Even if I was pissed off about the things he said, at least he would talk to me… I am so fucking dumb, I mean what a stupid way to get him to talk to me… Though I guess I used sax as a way to get him to talk to me… I give you permission to judge me! He says he’s struggling to find the beginning to read from the start, I think I make more sense if you read from the beginning, after everything I’ve been through & why I put up with this shit from Phoenix …
So we’ve really gotten into Geocaching, which I love that it’s our thing. I love my geeky thing that I haven’t done for years & showing it to him too. It’s also really good for us because we can’t just go out like a usual couple, I mean we have done dates which anyone could catch us but getting out & doing something active is probably what our thing is, otherwise we just sit around my house & just have sex. Don’t get me wrong I want to fuck him every time I see him, but I do love the sex-less dates – when they happen!
The weather is awful today. I have called in sick, finished my interview & he will finish around the time that I will be free around midday & that will give us a few hours together, he says to meet him near him to we have more time together, so I meet at his work & I take him home to get changed, get his rain jacket & he says we will go somewhere for lunch, that we can’t always have sex – which I huff about, even though I said this morning we weren’t going to have sex!
I have found a track of geocaches around Myponga reservoir but because it looks fucked with the weather, like it could piss down with rain at any moment, we find a cafe in Myponga – looks like everything else has shut down. It’s yummy food & Phoenix pays for me. We find a couch to sit & cuddle on, kissing & chatting before our food arrives. These are the moments that I cherish. A moment that someone in a relationship for eight years would usually probably take for granted. Even though I had been ‘seeing’ this man for so long, you would usually just be a normal couple, we are anything but normal. But people probably look at us thinking we are a new couple, a loved up new couple out on a first month date or something because of all the touching & kissing.
The café brings our lunch & I see that my soup has a lot of garlic at the bottom, like garlic granules. It tastes great but I know that later he will tell me my breath is rank – like he did the very first night we fucked, that he never lets me forget, so I give him a spoonful or two towards the end because then he will have garlic breath too. As he finishes eating it, I tell him that I gave it to him so he has garlic breath! He laughs when I tell him & says that it is really garlicy!
After lunch we leave the café for the reservoir & some geocache hunting – I have forgotten the stamp that I bought, but most of these ones are small anyway. I really love doing this with him. It’s so lame, but fuck it’s just nice walking with him, holding his hand, talking with him. It’s cold & windy, so we can’t talk that well, especially since we also have our hoods on, its harder to hear. We are looking for ages for one of the geocaches that just as we find it, the rains come & it’s heavy. I start running back to the car while Phoenix walks but he makes it back there about 20 steps behind me, being his legs are so much longer.
We decide to risk a walk for another one as the rains comes & go quickly. As we’re walking & talking, I tell him it’s cold & that I wore no bra, because I was going to sit opposite him at lunch & my nipples would get hard cos it’s cold & he would just have to look at them. I unzip my jacket, even though it’s cold & give him a little peak of how hard they are through my Lycra sports top. Before I know what’s happening, he’s pulled my top up to expose my tits to the cold air, in the middle of the forest. Now I am not worried, there are no cars at all & we have not seen a person, only kangaroo’s since we arrived. I pull my top down & tell him off, with a laugh asking how he’d like it if his cock was out in the cold. Two seconds later, his cock is out. It’s hard. So I suggest – because there is going to be no sex today, that I just suck his cock in the forest… To my surprise, his worry is about how I will get down on my knees in the wet forest, I laugh saying that is the last concern I thought he would have. He can be sweet sometimes. I tell him that I will bob down, I don’t need to put my knees on the ground & that I think it’s hilarious that where my knees are going to go on the wet ground is the main concern for him right now when I am offering to suck his cock in a forest!
We get to the geocache area & we look around for a moment, but then I am standing a on a log, close to Phoenix & about his height that I grab him & kiss him, really passionately. He reciprocates by kissing me back, that I reach down & feel for his cock, I pull it out & bob down to suck it, in broad daylight, in the middle of some bushes. My knees don’t hit the wet, muddy ground, but I suck his cock for a little while, not heaps long. I stand up to kiss him & see if he likes it, with his cock in my hand & he says he wants to fuck me. He turns me around before I can really say anything & tugs on my pants, I unbutton them but say we should go deeper into the bushes – it is still very exposed, I face a tree, my pants are around my ankles so quickly, bending over & guiding his cock in me from behind. He starts off slow but then building to pound me hard, my hands a breaking bark off the tree with every regrip, he tells me that I am so wet. Broad daylight, forest fucking, when I say forest, we are literally in about ten steps from the path & we are not deep in a forest, there are small pine trees with a few large gum trees, but this is one of the most exposed fucks I’ve ever had.
We aren’t fucking long before he says he’s cumming, I tell him to cum in me. It’s hot & sexy, I am not surprised he didn’t last long & to be honest, we couldn’t have a long session out in the wilderness anyway. He steps away & knows I haven’t cum, I pull my pants up a bit before he is back over by me & slides his hands into my panties & starts rubbing my clit. He pushes me back against the tree we just fucked on & he is rubbing my clit so well that I know I am going to cum… I know that when I get close & make more noise & I start cumming, he stops thinking I am finished, but I am not, so I make sure that I tell him I am cumming but that he shouldn’t stop, I tell him to keep going because I cum longer than he thinks sometimes.
As I pull up my pants, he says, “is the cache even over here? Did you just bring me over here to fuck me” & laughs. I didn’t just bring him into the bushes to fuck him. As we’re walking around looking for it, my ass feels a bit wet & I touch it & can’t work out if it is wet, I bend over & make him look to tell me if it is wet, which he says yes – I think it’s our cum! We find the geocache easily then walk back to the car & go to the bathroom because I’ve also just had his cum rubbed into my clit. I need to make sure that I don’t get a UTI. We attempt another geocache but as we have to cross a mini river, we decide that it’s not worth it, that it’s too close to him needing to leave & it’s still a bit too far away.
I do take a photo with him, I love the way he pulls me in tight next to him when I ask for a photo. He knows its my favourite part so he does it again, maybe even if I hadn’t told him, he would have still done it. Something people probably take for granted if their partner does that, but I relish in the fact that he pulls me tight, like he actually wants to be in the photo. I remember seeing one of him & his wife shortly after we ended the first affair on their AMM profile, they are out, she looked all made up with makeup & hair nice, is obvious they are taking a pic together, they’re sitting next to each other but he has leaned in so his head is in the pic but isn’t touching her at all, same as their wedding picture she obviously loves as it’s her FB profile picture, she is leaning on him smiling & he doesn’t even look like he wants to be there in either photo, from what I remember… I never want that for me, where a guy chooses me, but really isn’t in it – so much so that it’s obvious to an outsider that he couldn’t care less about the picture. Phoenix looks & feel – with his hand around my waist, invested in this picture.
We do a couple more geocaches, we have some laughs when he can’t start my car because he is using his key. We have similar cars so our keys are the same. We stop at another rest stop on the way home & do another geocache & as I have my phone out for the cache, I take another picture of us & the view of the valley, I send all three pictures to him. I wonder what he’ll do with them… I don’t know if he notices or if I tell him but I have made a picture of us from Hallett Cove, my phone background. I love seeing us looking so happy every time I open my phone.
We have some touches, hold hands while driving & some conversation before I am dropping him back at his car – my least favourite thing to do. We kiss goodbye, he pulls this face when I say that I’m sad he has to go, that he tells me he’s sad about it too, he says, “don’t miss me too much” & he legs it out the car & is in his car before I can really say anything, so as I see him reversing I send a message, unprecedently first, that simply says, “I miss you already.”
Because we’ve talked all day, particularly about how I’ve been feeling, as he goes offline for the afternoon, I send “I’m glad we can talk about when I’m feeling insignificant… But I want you to know, I realise sometimes I’m being a fuckwit… I guess I didn’t really think that when you’re alone no family home, that’s your time to do what you want… I just expect you you want to use that time chatting to me. It’s not that you don’t want too, but it’s either chatting to me or your family are home & take your focus… I just sometimes need to remember the situation I’m in & while I think it’s difficult for me, it’s also difficult for you. Love you a lot. I’ve been awake since 3am, so not sure I’ll be awake late but you probably won’t either, old man. Chat later xxx” He says when he comes back online later that night, “Sometimes your brain makes sense haha!” he also adds not to wait up, he’s falling asleep. I have been trying to be reflective of this situation & the part I play, “I try to be reasonable even when I’m being unreasonable… 🤣”
#IBD4U
I've Been Dating For You 