Snapchat

Not a lot has been happening on the dating scene in 2023. With both Fisherman & Farmer having the audacity to ghost me… I am done. Like really done! I am still deep in this backyard reno (a year later), I have two very recent health diagnosis that I am working through – I should do a post about both TBH just so I don’t feel so alone with both of them, I have quit my job & starting a new one (which includes a trip to QLD) & I have moved my little lash business back home – a full circle. It’s been so busy that I just cannot factor in a boy.

But my new eye lash lady tells me that her friend met her boyfriend on Snapchat as a random add & they have been dating for years now… Well I get random adds every single day – probably because I am ‘Cheekie ******’, that I ignore, but perhaps this could be something for me too?

So I start adding everyone… Fuck it is funny. But it gets boring so quickly & I delete people so quickly! So a lot of the time, they say, “Heyy” (yes with the 2 y’s) but my reply is always, “Where from & How old?” as my standard questions that I now ask first, however then I get, “Can I see you?” What is with that? I mean I understand they want to see what I look like but about 99.9% of the time I have taken a selfie, put it in my story & they have looked at it. Which is usually my reply, “In my story, but what do you know, you’ve already looked at it.” They then say sorry or you’re hot. Sometimes I get, no I want to see all of you – meaning I need to see if you’re fat or not. Of course I also get asked for nudes too, but no one is getting that these days…

What is is the sentence though, “Can I see you?” It’s never different on snap… Why don’t they ask, “Can you send me a pic?” or “What do you look like?” I think it’s so fucking weird to say, “Can I see you?” – or is it just me that thinks that’s a weird phrase?! It’s like a universal thing for snapchat.

Another thing they will say is, “Sorry for the add, I hope it’s ok.” Well dipshit, of course it’s ok, or I wouldn’t have added you back! Then we go through bullshit about where I’m from & what I look like etc. Ironically most that ask to see me, don’t share a picture with me. Usually they are deleted quickly.

My personal favourite when they add me is, “Do I know you?” No fuck wit you don’t, you added me from quick add – which they usually deny. Sometimes they will say, “Oh you came up in my list so I added you.” or sometimes it’s like a whole bunch of messages pretending to know me or think they know me, all a ploy to get pictures etc. Another personal fav is the, “I don’t get on here much, can I have your number.” No dude, you cannot. Then there are the ones who call you, I block those who call me, do not call me on snapchat, thanks!

“How cheekie are you?” I mean I sort of ask for that, don’t I? However it doesn’t make it any less annoying! Also the amount of dick pics! FUCK. What is wrong with men… I get so many snaps with their dicks so I took to screenshotting them as they get a notification that I have done so. When they see that I have screenshotted they will sometimes ask me to delete it or ask what I am going to do with it. Then I block them. Of course I delete their ugly dick pic but I hope they think twice about spamming someone else with their cock.

Picture this – a guy sitting on the toilet (my personal favourite) in a dirty white t shirt, his fingernails are filthy as are his hands, his fairly big dick is so untrimmed, you can’t even see if he has balls & to top it off, the white toilet seat is dirty also… ABSOLUTELY FOUL! What is wrong with men. Another sent me a video if this micro-penis & his hairy asshole… Another sent me a video of him pissing in the toilet… WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.

If you know snapchat, you know that it also sends you a notification when someone is typing, which is fucking annoying as it means you get two notifications if they send you one “Heyy,” then you get another notification when they quickly say, “Can I see you?” (Usually without a question mark.) & sometimes another when they look at your story & then say you’re hot or if they send you their own snap – usually of their filthy penis. But when I get a million notifications one day & the person I share my office with asks what is happening with my phone as it vibrates for a long time like a call, I look & one of the randoms has sent a video – opening a video at work is always risky. But I’m pretty sure this guy did the same thing this morning. He records himself singing in his car, seemingly while driving to songs on the radio. Firstly his voice isn’t great so it’s not about that & he is singing the whole song. So I get multiple snaps for the WHOLE song & he’ll send about 4-5 full renditions of songs. Needless to say he is blocked rapidly.

I’ve barely had a conversation with any snapchatters that lasted more than a couple of chats & the ones that do talk are usually too young for me or live far away. I did get chatting to one guy from Adelaide – he was a bit of a ranting weirdo, but I thought for a split second about potentially meeting him, but he deleted me before we even got anywhere close to that anyway – which perplexed me. However I guess like I suspected for Farmer, he was probably married.

Creepiness galore when someone from the chat app adds me, which I have not been on in months & they start saying things about me that they know, probably not to freak me out but to prove they know who I am, so we chat a bit but I don’t put in that much effort, much like I didn’t on the chat app & we just sporadically chat as we did on there. If I didn’t chat to them much on there, I am not going to chat to them much on snapchat unless they put in some effort & I feel like it’s worth it to put in effort back.

So the more randoms you add, the more randoms that add you. So I get about 20 per day & I add most of them, but most of them I block within a few hours or so because of the above bullshit. So I don’t even think I am going to have a decent chat with anyone from snapchat, let alone meet someone to date! Hahaha…

#IBD4U