Marvel #3

So I struggled to write last week, I think I will struggle to get this story out – but you need to hear it… I apologise for the lack of post last week… As I said before this story never gets easier. I am definitely not going to go into as much detail as I have in the past with this him…

Listen to this song while you read!

Now- onto the post, we all know that I am drawn to him like a fucking moth to a flame. I have told you before, he is a drug. I am an addict.

One last hit & then I promise I am done…

Does anyone even believe that?

I admit to him that I have missed talking to him & he tells me that my sister will kill me for chatting to him again – which she probably would but I figure that talking to him is better than not talking to him… If I can have my friend back, I am willing to put my feelings aside & have him in my life, can he do the same? Well in true Marvel style, he avoids the topic. I cheekily send some pics & remind him of how wet I get around him because he refuses to answer. But I have to know… Can we be friends? Does he want that? Does he want to keep talking to me? “Fine we can be friends” this relieves me. I know things will never be the same with him, I mean how many chances do you get with the same guy?

But like he says within 24 hours, I am sending him a video of a vibe inside me – we’ve been arguing about being friends & I am so turned on, that I have walked in the door & to my bedroom, when he says that I can’t cum… As if he still has control over my orgasms, but like the good little girl I am for him, I wait until he allows me… Videoing it & sending him the video which he replies “We can’t fuck but fuck the tension is going to be bad” Could I have no strings sex with him again? I haven’t have a decent fuck since he fucked me last time.

His new thing to say to me about everything though is “No Comment” or “you wish”. While he used to say that to me a lot in the past, he would always back it up with some thing about hot that was or something else he wants to do to me, but now he just says no comment & doesn’t add anything to it.

He says goodbye & that he won’t be on for a few days but sure enough, he’s on every day, even if for a short time… I am not pining for him to come back online, I don’t wait by my phone, while I write back sometimes quicker that I care to admit, I don’t always dash to write back or have that feeling when I’m at work when I can’t reply straight away…

But now I can’t help myself now – I am playing a game with myself, how long will we chat before he’s asking me to fuck him this time? It’s a fucking risky game because I am so sure in my head that I am going to say no if he asks but also how the fuck will I say no?! My vagina & heart are never in sync, my head has no idea what it’s doing… This is a stupid game but I want to play…

I send picture after picture & tell him sexy scenarios – anytime I try to keep the convo friendly he reads my message & doesn’t reply, it doesn’t bother me as much as it used too… I am not as stubborn as I was with him. I see where that got me in the past, no where… While I still know that this isn’t our time & to be perfectly honest, I think our time has past & our relationship won’t ever be the same, but I am desperate to see if the chemistry is still there, if I still love him when I see him – the more & more we talk, the more & more I am sure that we will see each other again… For lunch again or perhaps we’ll have sex… But I know that he is able to physically pull me in. I resisted him emotionally the first time, the second time I was a goner & this time I can put my guard up. It could just be physical. I am not sure I could do that & I am not sure that he will want to see me, but the electricity between us is crackling again via messages… How long can we resist? Will he just disappear?!

This is right in the beginning of the pandemic we call covid 19. Around this time I get the calls from T**y’s girlfriend, I have to shut my little hobby business & we start working from home in my full time job. A fucking pandemic…. He & his wife are essential retail workers so they are business as usual… I am working from home with a neurotic boss calling me every minute to find out what I am doing, that I get no work done.

I never told a lot of people that I was talking again to Marvel, so this is probably news to some of my friends but one of the things that got me through this time, was chatting to Marvel. I was lucky enough to become very close with a friend who I’ve know for so many years, our brothers are actually friends & so we’ve always known each other & lived close. We’d both been going to the same gym & then covid hit, she wasn’t working & I didn’t have an hour commute to work so we were able to go for a walk/jog every day. It was a god send. Being cooped up at home with only your boss calling you wasn’t easy – I’m not saying the working from home, lock down stuff was easy for anyone but yeah it wasn’t easy for me being alone. Having Marvel back in my life literally made things easier. I was able to just forget about all the drama at work, drama with what was happening in the world & just be in my sex talk bubble with Marvel.

When we talk about the second affair & I say that it was 2 months – which it was closer to 3 but I cut it back a bit, he says that it was only 2 weeks… Is he fucking joking? We chatted for 3 months & fucked for 2, he says that we chatted for 2 months & fucked for 2 weeks…

I know for a fact it was more than 2 weeks, I have it all written down in case she does come after me, because lets be honest, if she knew, I’d be dead but nothing fucks me off more now that he thinks we only had an affair for 2 weeks… This may be the way he justifies it in his head. But I remind him of the fact that I saw him at the royal show & we fucked a 2 months later right up until he got married, so that was not only 2 weeks. He finally agrees that it was 4 weeks, but it was 6 however I let it go when he says “Thanks for unblocking my wife & putting up that post BTW” FUCK OFF. Firstly I reply that all my posts are private, I didn’t unblock her & he should fucking tell her to stop stalking me. He tells me to back off from him & not do anything, why don’t I ever get the same courtesy. I tell him that she is blocked & so is he… so I don’t know what he’s talking about. Also my posts are private. So whatever dude. I am fucking over being blamed for ruining his relationship, I am the single one, I am allowed to be online. I am not committed to someone else, lying to them… He says that he’s blocked me on her phone when he got sick of hearing about me. He says that he even got someone else from the chat app (A friend he was close too who I chatted too a bit about him the first time) to look at the post on FB to see if she could see it. OH MY FUCKING GOD.

So we argue about this for a while, but it took me a while but I think I figured out what here. I shared a song from Spotify so I assume when I did that, it made the post public. He suggests that when she changed her surname on FB that it unblocked me. I have no idea, but I know that I didn’t do anything on purpose. Sure I wrote a post & used a song from his favourite band, if she’s stalking my FB page then that’s not my problem! My Facebook is private & I can share whatever the fuck I like on there!!

He tells me that this is why he was reluctant to be friends with me, he said that he felt that I had done it on purpose. As far as I knew, she had stalked my FB page but I had her & him blocked… If she saw something I put on my private FB page, that’s on them. I can’t believe that he’s allowed to show his partner when I live, give out my FB to someone on the chat app to look  up & I’m not allowed to post what I want on my private page. Fucking hell he’s asshole. I am so fucking angry right now that I say that I wish I was nuts. I wish I could get in my car & got to her work, show her that he’s messaging me. When I tell him that I could go nuts, he says please don’t & that I am scaring him. GOOD! But why does this turn me on having a massive fight with him? There is something wrong with me…

#IBD4U

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