When I wake up I decide not to write back straight away to Motocross’ message saying that he’s changed his flight, I mean I am not sure I believe it. But is it so unbelievable that a man would want to change his flight so he could see me?! Or do I just not believe any of what this guy is telling me because I can’t google him & he should be easily googled from info that he’s told me about his occupation?!
I make him (for a change) wait till almost 11:00 am for my reply “Hey sorry I was asleep when I got your message. I have a hair appointment tonight so will be home about 9-9:30 if that’s ok?” he says it sounds good. We don’t talk again for the rest of the day. After my appointment, I send him a message that I’ll be home in the next 10 minutes. He replies instantly “Sounds good I’ll be inside you in 20” with a poking out tongue emoji. FUCK finally! I say that I hope so & he says “Lol it’s happening” Maybe it isn’t just friends for him?
I walk in the door, turn on the heater, grab a beer & shortly after Motocross knocks on the door. Really, he’s still knocking, unless I tell him the door is unlocked he knocks?! Anyway whatever, lets not dwell on that… He gets to my house & I kind of expect to be pushed up against the wall in the throws of passion, but he comes in awkwardly & doesn’t kiss me hello, he says something about my hair (at least he says something about my hair!) & we sit on the couch, chatting.
It’s already after 9:30 pm when we sit chatting, both us take turns in getting up to warm by the heater, when he is standing by the heater at one point, I say something about his flight that was supposed to be today & he says that if I had’ve written back to him last night that he would’ve come over then (Murray Bridge is an hour & a half drive from my house – he wouldn’t have got here till after 12:30 am – would he have really come over?!) & his reply said that he had already changed his flight to come over tonight, but he says “Well I changed it cos I wanted to see you.” I sit there unable to look at him thinking how fucking cute that is – smirking like an idiot, I say that quietly & he asks what I said, coming back over to the couch to sit next to me, this time a little closer, I tell him that it’s fucking cute that he changed his flight… I feel like I don’t blush a lot in real life (As you can imagine, I am quite open with a lot of things – blushing isn’t something that happens often) but I am blushing. So it’s not long (but it’s longer than 20 minutes) that Motocross & I lean into kiss each other, both realising we need to make a move at the same time, we kiss & have sex in my bedroom the same way as we have most times we’ve fucked. It’s good & I can’t believe how much I missed it. What a relief.
Laying there afterwards, naked in bed, he says “We should’ve done that 4 times ago” I can’t help but giggle, not only do I agree & wish we had fucked the last few times but how fucking cute is it that he knows how many times he’s seen me that we haven’t had sex!! I ask why didn’t we have sex 4 times & he just says he doesn’t know… I mean I have no excuse for it either, it’s not like we’re tired, He leaves at midnight or later, it’s not that late that we’re so tired we don’t want too. He also tells me at this time that I’m the best at giving head that he’s ever had… I like sucking dick, we all know that… However this guy hasn’t ever gone down on me & he’s still not touched my clit to get me off. Yet I’m still sucking his dick? & he’s not the first guy to tell me that I’m the best they’ve ever had… So I know I am good at it, great even…
He gets up to leave around 1:30 am, giving me that lingering hug at the door & saying he’ll message me tomorrow. Which is also a new development too, saying that he’ll message tomorrow. He usually just plans the next date before he leaves or just hugs me, so saying he’ll message tomorrow is quite new. I also will now stupidly expect a message, I mean if I say I’m going to message, then I will message. So unfortunately for me, tomorrow I will think about nothing else, until he messages me… I almost wish he didn’t say he would message me, because then I can just go about my day & not think about why he hasn’t messaged me.
The next day, I think about him all day. I know his flight to wherever he is going is today, that he changed – I don’t know what time it is though… I still can’t believe I fell for that – is it even true?! Well I’ll never know so we will just give him the benefit of the doubt! I wait for his message & the whole day I jump every time I get a notification on my phone waiting for his fucking message! Fuck you Motocross for saying he’d message! It’s Friday night, I have a work social club event, bowling & laser tag so I am out when I see his name pop up on my watch “Hey how was your day?” Wow he actually messaged me first! I tell him that I’m on my way home & ask how his flight was, he asks how bowling is & I say that I won the game of bowling & came 4th in laser tag. He sounds surprised that I say I’m not that shit at activities. He says that he is surprised but didn’t think I was shit. I tell him that I could kick his ass he replies “haha settle down miss pumping your own tires much” Why the fuck do men call women miss? Especially women older than them. It’s weird! I tell him that I have to pump my own tyres as no one else will! He says that I was good at mini golf & he says about bowling “I thought you might get distracted with balls in hands. True I’d pump ya but not your tires tho” I tell him that he did that last night & it felt fucking amazing, he says he’s keen for more though (tho). Well that’s good to know – I guess. I tell him that I’ll take him bowling & how him how good I am & that I am keen for more too. He says “Yeah that sounds good I’m keen” I ask if he means bowling or sex & he says both. I say good answer & he says correct. I don’t reply as I fall asleep.
We don’t talk again until Sunday when I message to ask how his weekend was & if he won his race. He says that he did (of course!) I tell him that I have been out this weekend for a ride with nephew, he then asks what I’m doing tonight! Finally this dude is making plans. Interestingly when I back off a bit, he seems to realise. I tell him that my family is over & he came come over after, he says ”Yeah sure I can cum” I smirk at that, I message him at 8:20 pm to say my family is going now, but when he’s still not at my house at 8:45 pm nor has he replied, that I send another message. I don’t get a reply but he rocks up 15 minutes later, with no kiss as he walks in but an apology for being later & not replying to my texts.
We sit down on the couch watching music, I prefer to put on music because then we talk. If we watch a dumb movie, we actually watch the movie. Motocross sits closer to me tonight instead of on the other end of the couch, we actually snuggle while chatting, which is also a new development, I’m not a really cuddly person, so I don’t mind not cuddling but this is nice to sit, chat & cuddle for a change. It’s been 6 weeks with Motocross & we’ve been on over 20 dates & we’re finally cuddling on the couch like a couple. While our sex is the same as in his moves are the same, no foreplay besides kissing, it’s also very different, it feels different, more connected perhaps? Motocross tells me afterwards that I am the best he’s ever had. This isn’t new news to me, I’ve been told this before & he’s told me similar before.
When Motocross jumps up to leave, I am perplexed. I do tell him that he can stay over sometimes & he says he definitely will, we have the lingering hug goodbye & he asks what I’m doing Tuesday, am I free to catch up, which I say that I am. Ironically though, he knows I have a high sex drive, he’s told me that he has a high sex drive, we’re obviously moving into a more than friends, more than sex vibe, why doesn’t he want to stay over? Why doesn’t he want to message me more? Is it because he’s leaving for the USA in a couple of months & he’s getting attached already? I don’t know why I can’t ask the questions, I don’t want to ruin then time when we’re together. I also don’t want to be that crazy woman demanding he message me every day & then I become an obligation. I want someone to want to be with me because they want to be with me – not because I give them an ultimatum or pull a stunt!
We don’t message again after that cuddly evening until Tuesday when I message to say I’m going to the gym he can come after he says yeah cool. I message when I get home & he says that he’s just eating so it takes him almost 40 minutes to get to my house at 9:00pm. I have put on music again so we can talk. I am also trying to build up the courage to talk to him about what the fuck is going on with us. He gets all excited about the car that he’s buying his brother this week. He says that he’s never had a brand new car & Motocross is buying him a brand new car, he went to Holden this week to look at cars & has picked one out, he’ll pick it up tomorrow & give it to him. He tells me how it’s a $90k car & he had the cash in a backpack! -WTF?! $90K IN A BACKPACK? Really?! I honestly have no reason to doubt what this guy tells me – to not believe him, but I also find it really hard to believe anything he says to me. Could this even be true?!
It’s like he can sense I want to talk to him about us & the where were going talk, because he says he’s really tired & really sorry but he’s going to go home. He’s been at my house an hour & a half, why did he bother? I guess he didn’t want to bail. He wanted to see me perhaps? So we obviously don’t have sex, we don’t have the talk I was planning, he gives me a lingering hug goodbye & says that he wants to see me Thursday. I say ok & suggest that we go bowling, since we talked about it a few times since I went with work people. He says he’d love that, but also apologising for leaving, walking out about 10:30 pm after getting to mine at 9:00 pm. I need to back away, I am going to get hurt here. I can just feel it.