I keep thinking that there is going to be a message from Silverling saying that he can’t meet, something has happened, another melt down or something has happened with the kids… Some excuse to get out of seeing me, not necessarily because he doesn’t want to see me but because he’s acting weird & she’s picked up on it. But I just go about my night, I go to the gym, to boxing, as class I tried to avoid because the Doppelganger goes to it. & of course, I get fucking paired with this guy, which makes me work so much harder but fuck it’s hard because the guy is so lovely & encouraging. I write to Silverlining to tell him that I got paired with his twin & I never get a reply, so I try to rest for the night, knowing I won’t sleep much with thoughts of how tomorrow might go.
The next morning Silverlining just says something about punching his doppelganger hard, I am surprised at the one short message & I think that this is him trying to back off now that we’re supposed to meet in a about an hour or so. FUCK. But he says “Sometimes I go a bit crazy and spill my guts. Held back today. You miss my 20 thousand morning messages ?” Of all the days for him to hold back, he picks the day we’re supposed to meet again. I don’t even know what he is thinking will happen today, am I going to fuck him or will we just tease each other & cum without penetrating?! Do you think we can meet & not fuck? SHIT.
He sends me a dick picture when he watches the video I sent him yesterday, one that he didn’t command me to send but he says that he got an instant hard on. We don’t talk about me leaving or meeting him, so I just get in my car & drive. My heart beating erratically, I am seeing him again. I see his car & I drive over taking a deep breath, I pull up next to his car at his gym at exactly 9:00 am, not only because I am always crazily on time but I am also wanting to spend every minute with him as I can. But he’s not at his car, so I assume he actually went into the gym, I send him a message asking if he went inside, but then he appears… In a daggy tracksuit & t shirt but still cute as fuck. He gets in the front seat of my car. It’s been less than a week since our first lunch date & I am desperate to touch him. As soon as he gets in the car we kiss & hug hello. The electricity sparks between us, I don’t even understand how it happens. I don’t even know why he ignites something in me, that no other man has ever sparked in me. I know I spark it in him too – why else would he be here if he didn’t have some sort of epic connection with me. Why is he with someone else, why isn’t he with me? This spark could be ours every day. But then I wonder if it’s the sneaking around that makes us so hot? I mean he said he was falling for me before we even met, I was too I mean I’ll deny it but I did make sure we made the agreement to take it in turns to message each other.
He becomes obsessed with where I’ve parked, in fact he makes me move the car twice before he’s happy with where we’re parked at his gym – even then I don’t think he’s ok with it & tried to get me to move the car a third time, but I refuse. We sit in the car chatting & when he reaches out to touch my leg, I melt against his touch, we kiss, this time we properly kiss & I realise how much I have missed his mouth on mine, his tongue caressing mine & his hands exploring my body… He slips his hands up my skirt & rubs the outside of my panties, making my legs spread so easily, I reach out for his cock & can feel how hard it is. When we stop for a breather, after all it is only just after 9:00 am on a Tuesday at a gym carpark. However he still finds a way to slip his fingers inside me, make me wet for him & so turned on… His cock is in my hand & we’re making noises for each other that I’ve longed to hear from him & I that I haven’t made with another man since. I want to have sex with him.
We talk about everything, there is no topic I can’t talk about with this man. I make sure that I say I love you to his face. We talk & kiss, look into each other’s eyes – I can see his feelings for me when I look into his eyes, we caress & touch for about 45 minutes – it’s hot & heavy, the breathing, the wanting, the touching, the kissing, the connection – it’s not long before he suggests that we go back to his house. I never thought I’d ever go there again, but it’s not long before he is jumping in his car & I’m following him to his house.
He’s inside his house before I even park the car down the street a little, as I walk inside he takes me in his strong arms, we’re kissing with so much passion, there is no way that anyone else in the world has ever kissed like this, ever connected like this. The electricity coming off both of us is intoxicating, I want him inside me, I need him inside me. I need to be as close as two people can be. I know he feels it too, I am taking off his shirt & we’re getting undressed quicker than I care to admit. I’m on my knees with his dick in my mouth & he makes that manly groaning noise that I fucking love, not every guy makes a noise when you suck their dick & they really should because fuck me, that noise is sexy as hell… We go into his little games area that he’s created while being his super geeky self without a phone, he’s got a tv & all his computer consoles. I’m pushed on the couch & he fingers me till I’m close to cumming, his favourite trick. He can still get me so close without letting me cum. I love this game, but I also fucking hate it. He moves us so that he can slide his cock between my tits & I love this feeling of his cock sliding between my tits… The feel of him doing that turns me on, he doesn’t get why it turns me on, but it does… When we’re ready, I pull out a condom & a small white vibe I brought with me & he smirks asking me if I want him to use it.
I slide a condom down his hard cock & guide it inside me while sitting on his lap, we both make this noise as his cock enters me for the first time in 18 months…. FUCK. I have missed this, I want this, I am so in love with this man. I feel him inside me, feel his breath on my face, his hand touching my waist, my nipples in his mouth, I feel him sliding in & out of me as I ride him, bringing us as close as two people can be. This feels like sex should feel. It feels intimate, sexy, dirty & so fucking good! I cannot even really describe how this feels, words to seem so inadequate at the intimacy & chemistry combined with passion that I feel for this man. He is my everything, I would do anything for him. I would do anything for just a moment of his time, I am under his spell & this is what I want. His wish is my command & I will obey.
He moves us so he’s on top of me with the vibe on my clit, as he’s fucking me the vibe is teasing me, I try to rub my clit but he takes me arms roughly above my head & pins then there, he fucks me harder & harder I moan asking his permission to cum, he doesn’t answer so I start begging, I am moaning, begging, fucking him back, bucking underneath him, trying so hard not to cum but so close when he says cum for me, crying out as I start cumming, he pumps a few more times inside me & cums himself. FUCK. How did we just cum together after all this time?!
We sit there on the couch for a little while, chatting we don’t have sex again & then almost like something happened, he’s basically pushing me out the door, he’s constantly looked at her location on his phone the whole time I’m there – which is good in one way in case she’s on her way home to murder me but fucking annoying I don’t ever get his undivided attention. The most annoying part is now him trying to get me to leave after he’s implied that he wanted a few hours with me, it’s before 11:00 am & I start to feel like a guest who’s outstayed their welcome. I get up getting dressed sheepishly, he picks up the condom & doesn’t really know what to do with it, looking around for somewhere to put it, so I tell him to put it in a tissue & I will take it… Oh my fucking god, as if I do that! There are no words to describe this feeling either, being kicked out of his house, feeling like an intruder, after cumming with him with such a deep connection, all of that is just shattered – within a split second. Maybe he’s realising what a mistake this was? He basically pushes me out the door, his hand on my back & says I love you. I know he has to be at work at 12:30 pm & so I wasn’t staying much longer anyway but fucking hell, I barely get to say I love you back before the door is shut in my face. What just happened? I was in a euphoric state, that was epic sex, epic making love, just to be shoved out the door. I rush to the car – feeling used, feeling weird, feeling like a fucking idiot. I have a used condom, a wrapper and a dirty vibrator in my bag, I am covered in my ex boyfriends cum, I have just had epic sex yet I’ve never felt more dirty & not in a good way! What the fuck just happened?! I want to message him & ask because I know he will tell me truth via message but fuck him. Fuck it all. He’s a prick. He always said he was & he’s just proved it.
I am barely 15 minutes down the road when I see a message from him – it makes me fucking smile – like an actual factual dickhead. Man I hate myself sometimes… “You boost me yet” WHAT? Then he corrects it “Ghost” I should fucking ghost him. This is the perfect opportunity to ghost him. I feel like a dickhead, I should ghost him, I got what I wanted, I got my epic sex. Can I be ok with just that? Just that one time, I said I just needed to fuck him one more time. I ask why he thinks I would ghost him when I get home, unable to control my fingers from replying to him “Yeah was hoping I could hang with you till 12. Sorry. Use me for good sex then ghost me?” I knew he had to start work about 12:30 pm, so I wasn’t going to stay much longer at his house anyway but the way this all happened is just weird. I ask why he didn’t hang with me till 12:00 pm if that’s what he wanted & he tells me not to ask, which of course just makes me ask more – I assume that because he plays with his phone all the fucking time he’s with me checking her location & replying to her messages that she’s gotten suspicious & he’s freaked out about something she said. He says that they had a fight in the morning before work & she wanted him to go by her work before he starts “Think she’s just done it to keep my leash tight.” OMFG! What the fuck games do these two play, do they get off on it?! Maybe it’s part of what turns them on?!
I tell him that I wasn’t planning on staying much longer anyway but did want to fuck him again before I left, I say that I had 4 condoms with me & assumed that we’d use a couple, not just one. “Omg did you really lol? I assumed you only took one! See that’s why condoms suck haha. But 4 is ummm, you were keen.” He doesn’t reply for a while, I’m assuming he’s at her work, having lunch with her – after having fucked me less than an hour before, smoothing things over with her, that when he messages me again, I read it (because I know he can’t see that I have read it) & I go about what I am doing. I’m going to Brisbane in 2 days, I start packing, I try to distract myself from writing back to him. I am already in too deep & this man is constantly trying to keep his partner happy, when he himself is not happy. But does he ever really think about my happiness?