Holden

I have mentioned Holden a fair bit throughout the Noodle story. I met Holden & his wife on the chat app & we became good friends – I became friends with both of them. I knew that Holden wanted to fuck me, his wife had told me that & they were exploring an open relationship of sorts.

When I was seeing Crows, we even had a group with the four of us because I thought that might be easier as I knew that Holden’s wife was uneasy about the whole open thing & very jealous. I know that she has been with other guys but to my knowledge he hasn’t been with anyone.

I also knew that Noodle would fucking hate me if I ever fucked Holden, he said that many times to me. I mean if I didn’t fall in love with Noodle & Holden’s wife wasn’t so jealous & if I didn’t become good friends with her, then I would have probably fucked him. He’s a decent looking guy, not 100% my type, I prefer a man with hair, Holden has a shaved head & a beard, he’s fair & tall, quite nice body & a pretty big looking dick – from pictures I’d seen!

The night of Switch that I saw Noddy & his snapchat chick at, I see Holden on a dating app, I screenshot it & send to him with a laugh, thinking that he is looking for a woman with his wife. But when Holden had told me that he & his wife had split up, she had someone else & he left. I guess I am skeptical of them “splitting” I mean Noodle told me it was over for him & yet he went back to his partner. So I just think I’m sure these two will get back together, they have four kids together & have another two they foster, these two aren’t breaking up anytime soon…

However he tells me that he’s moved out! OH HOLY FUCK… He’s in his own place & one of his son’s has moved in with him. This was totally unexpected. I mean I didn’t think these two would ever break up – they had only just gotten married less than a year ago, I think… I have been friends with both of them since I got on the chat app & have caught up with both of them a few times for dinners & Switch. I consider them both friends. However she has deleted me from Facebook & re-added me a few times, so I’m not sure what that is about. I always talked to him more anyway, so it’s not a big deal.

We chat a lot, most days, pretty much all day, I tell him that I get the whole falling in love online, which is what I think happened with his wife, he tells me “Yeah but you & Noodle were crazy, everyone could feel the chemistry off you two” Oh, fuck could they?! I tell him that there are a couple of guys that I used to chat too a lot that aren’t allowed to chat to me anymore, like I am going to fall in love with every guy I chat too…

We talk a lot & because he used to have a really hot Holden car in green, that I used to joke about having sex with him in, I tell him that if only he still had it then I would have sex with him! Hahaha.

I send him some pictures of the Krav weekend away & some of the switch pictures too, I show him wax dripped on me & he says that he wants to do it, which I say that I can help him out anytime. I invite him up to the weekend away but he has the kids, so I say another time & he says definitely. (I actually can’t believe how many men I was juggling!)

I tell him that us meeting up might cause some drama so we have to keep in on the down low, like no one could ever know! He agrees & I tell him that I am good at discreet, obviously being the other woman a few times, however this time I wouldn’t be the other women, this man is now single but I know that people would hate me for doing anything with this guy. I mean people hate me from the Private Play Party weekend & he asks what happened, I tell him that I don’t know & he says “That’s fkn weird, you were fine at the Play party weekend” He says that he’s on the outs now too since the split, so I say that he can join me! Hahaha.

He sends me pictures of his new house, not that I knew what his house looked like with her but he looks really set up with it fully set up with a couch & bed. I kind of expected it to be empty, so I relax a little… It is over with her. I start being cheeky with him, telling me that I’ve had a few wines, he says he’s going to delete all his pictures with his wife & start a new folder with my name. I send him a lingerie picture & tell him that it’s to start your collections. I send him a picture of how I looked & he says “Jesus Christ you scrubbed up pretty damn good”

We swap numbers again I see that he used to have me in his phone at Sexy #IBD4U & I send that to him & he then sends something back saying “She’s back” I tell him to be careful about me being in the family address book since I know they all have iPhones. I tell him that it will be a death sentence for me, I’ve already had enough crazy women after me, I don’t need anymore. He tells me that he thinks his wife realises they are done but he agrees we need to be discreet if we are going to meet.

When he says to me “Can I keep a pair of ya panties? I think they’d look real good on my fridge” I literally spit my drink everywhere & can’t help but laugh! I still can’t believe that’s how my life came crashing down around me, over a pair of my favourite green lace panties! I know this story with Holden isn’t going to end well, this is just playing with fire, even though this guy is single, living alone, I know that this is not a good idea. I am stupid for even considering it… I send him pictures of lingerie to get off this topic, I mean I don’t want think about that part of my life anymore.

I tell him that recently I have been playing a game called Lemmings from the 80’s on my phone to stop me from talking to boys… I say “Look at how well that is turning out” Jeez, I am chatting to this guy daily & I look forward to his chats to be honest. He was always quite shy & a genuine friend, I really miss the genuine friendship thing & I like that even though the chat is cheeky with Holden, it’s good to have a male friend.

He says that he needs to save some money & stop using it for games so that he can afford a TV in his room when a hot chick in a trench coat rocks up. I still haven’t done that, I bought the trench cost but never got to do that fantasy. Holden says that he has a bedroom door that goes outside so I wouldn’t have to go through the house which is why he needs the tv so that he can see me when his kid is there! He son is 15, so he’ll understand one day that his dad had chicks over.

He’s a massive star wars fan, but I confess that I’ve only seen the original 70’s ones & haven’t seen another others, so he tells me that he’ll watch them with me & explain what is going on… I would watch but I don’t think I will enjoy them so I would probably end up trying to have sex with him when I’m bored.

I am going away for work, yet again! Like am I ever home FFS. I get to the hotel & send him a picture of the shower, it was always a running joke about me catching some disease from the hotels that had foul shower curtains, but this one doesn’t so I had a laugh with him. I ask him if he want’s a shower picture of me & he says hells yes! So I am giggling like a school girl as I use my phone to draw a stick figure with boobs in the shower picture. I send it & he says “Literally just burst out laughing”

Because I’m away he asks for something for his fridge – like a souvenir & we’ve been talking about catching up so as a joke so I actually buy him a magnet from Port Augusta & think when I rock up at his house in a trench coat I can give him the magnet in a little brown paper bag it came in – I’ll be awkward about it but it’ll be funny.

I add a peach to the stick figure where my butt would be & I add white dots all over so it looks like I am covered in soap (I should post this picture, it’s quite funny!) He says that he needs to book some leave & come on a road trip with me… I start to think about how that would work! I hate myself for starting to plan the things in my head when a guys says that he’s going to do something… I really hate myself, but I also can’t not smile about this thought… I’ve always liked this guys sense of humour, I know how shy he always was, but I wonder if that’s because he always had a wife so didn’t want to be too forward.

I need to not do this when I meet a guy, start planning our future… This is not a good idea on so many levels… Yes he’s single, but he’s also fresh out of a relationship… This is not a good idea, so why can’t I stop it… It’s like a freight train!?

#IBD4U