Mixed Bag – Arrogant, Chatterbox, Drunk & UK

So, just so you know, I’m definitely not running out of stories of men I have dated or talked to over the years, don’t be worried about that – it’s actually disturbing me how much I actually have to write about! But I am going to start writing what I call a mixed bag series, which are basically just a couple of stories that aren’t really long enough for a blog post on their own but are worthy a blog post. (I did steal a similar idea from a fellow blogger! Thanks She-Wolf!)

So this filler blog (as I call them so you don’t get bored with the main story) is a mixed bag of a few different men. Still significant, but I probably should’ve written about them as it was happening or screen shotted more stuff, so I have some more content! Hahaha… But anyway, here are some short stories!Mixed bag arrogant uk chatterbox.png

Arrogant

Well this guy, Arrogant I matched with wasn’t even that cute or attractive to me, he actually reminded me of the popped collar dude I dated ages ago, Offroad. He wasn’t my type looks wise, but I was trying to expand the people I chat too & thought, why not “give him a go” (I’m going to shoot myself if I ever say that again!) Here is our exchange, you tell me where I went wrong?! I will happily take pointers on this one!

“Hey Arrogant, How are you?”

“Hey #IBD4U, How’s it going? Happy Friday. Nice Profile”

“Happy Friday to you too! Thanks”

“So how’s your weekend looking #IBD4U?” I wish he’d stop using my name… I know what it is, stop saying it! Why do men use your name a lot?

“Not too bad, yours?”

“Cycling in the morning but it’ll probably piss down haha, then a date. In a coffee shop. Hardly ideal.” Ok, right… I mean I know we’re on a dating app here & we’re not exclusive, nor have we met, but really does this guy have to tell me he’s going on a date today?! Also why didn’t he suggest somewhere better if he didn’t want to meet in a coffee shop? What is wrong with a coffee date anyway? I think you should meet at least for a drink or coffee or something… What does this guy even want from a date?

“What’s your ideal date then?”

“Depends on the premise of what’s ahead didn’t it Ms #IBD4U. Women hit 34 & suddenly fun, flirtatious, sex appeal, go with the flow gets replaces with stale interviews” Errr, what?! Is this guy serious!?

“You didn’t answer the question?” What is his perfect date? Are we clear on that?

“I did & more. So BDSM, something I’ve haven’t tried yet! Enjoy it?” Yeah he did type ‘I’ve haven’t tried’ that’s not a typo from me. hahaha… Does this guy seriously think he’s going to get fun flirty messages from me now? He’s an arrogant fuck!

“Well I disagree that you’ve answered… You explained what women are apparently like on a date, not what your ideal date was… Yeah I do enjoy it obviously.”

“Seems like you’ve just proven my point. There goes fun & flirtation flying out the window” Yeah because you’re an asshole!

“How have I proven the point? You said a coffee date was boring, I asked what your ideal date would be & you told me women over 34 are a stale interview!?” He doesn’t write back & delete him before he even gets a chance!

Yeah… That really happened!

 

Chatterbox

Thank you next… I find another man I am not really that attracted too… This might be the ‘I’m not really that attracted too’ series. WTF?! No offence intended here either, but I mean you all know I have no self confidence, so when I say this, it’s not because I have a big head, but these guys should be so lucky that I matched with them, I am a bit out of their league to be honest so maybe they know that & just try it on or maybe they are just douchebags!

“Hey Chatterbox, how are you?”

“Hey good thanks & you”

“Yeah not too bad thanks. What’s happening?”

“Not Much really what about you? Coming over?

“Coming over?” Is he serious? After hello pleasantries, he invites me over? Well that wasn’t even really an invite.

“Haha yes”

“You’re 144kms away so doubtful” How did I match with someone so far away? How the fuck does that even happen?!

“Dammm” I hit delete but really, is this what men do? Does it even work? & why was he so far away from me?! I’d be interested to see how often that approach works for someone.

 

Drunk

Another man, another few wasted days of messaging… Again, someone that I’m not really that in too but in the interest of this blog, I give them a go… Why do they start off normal & I start thinking about a future meeting with these guys, then bam! They fucking get weird!

“Hi #IBD4U, how are you?

“Hey, I’m good, you?”

“Good thanks, Just got back to work today though, unfortunately. So what do you get up to #IBD4U? I see you’re from the south suburb, I grew up there.” Why does he keep using my name too?

“Oh did you really? I have hurt my back a bit so struggling at the moment” Not sure why I offered up that info, usually they offer a massage that I will not accept.

“That’s no good!! How’d you do that?”

“I’m not sure… Driving so much I think” He then takes almost 24 hours to reply.

“Not good! How’s it going getting any better?” I stupidly take 3 days to reply… Probably because I’m not that into him, I just overlook the fact I haven’t written back. Whoops!

“Sorry Drunk, I thought I wrote back to you… My back is heaps better, how’s your week going?” He writes back at 6:30 am the next day.

“Just work unfortunately lol, I’m here till the 12th then 2 weeks at home” I don’t reply or see that message, then later that night, I get some more messages.

“Hey hun… I’m flat out intrigued by you!! lol I’m crazy sexual open minded!!! I love your pics!! Lol I’m a crane operator so of course I am a rigger lol flat out 100% dead honest!! I would love someone who would like to try swinging with me!!” WHAT THE FUCK! Is he serious? Swinging? We haven’t even met yet!

“I’ve had 3 somes before & shitty so called 4 somes!! I want someone whos dedicated to me & crazy open minded to have some fun together!! If that makes sense” Before I even see those messages, the next morning at 6:30 am, I get another message from him.

“I really need to turn my phone off when I’ve been drinking!!” I delete him…  Firstly, everyone reading this knows I would probably be open to some sort open relationship with an established partner – eventually, but no way would I be venturing into that with a dude I didn’t even know… WHAT THE FUCK. I guess putting up that I am kinky, wasn’t a good idea. I thought it would attract a guy who understood kink, not every Tom, Dick & Harry that wants to try it! 

 

UK

I find yet another guy I’m not that attracted too… I pretty much match with everyone I say yes too, again not being big headed, I do believe that I have gotten a bit better looking as I got older & also my pictures are amazing! Hahaha. So pretty much every guy I like, I get a like back & we match.

“Hey UK, how are you?”

“Yes doing great thanks. How are you? I’m moving back to the UK fri night. I start a new job in rugby on Monday. Are you around before I go?” Well at least this dude is honest about what this will be & what he wants.

“Hmmm, probably not” I’m going away for work & have a busy weekend, don’t think I can be bothered squeezing in a dude who’s leaving.

“I’d love to meet you today?” Yeah of course he would… “From you pics #IBD4U are you into BDSM?”

“I can’t… I work. Probably not much point if you’re leaving Monday. BDSM is not about ONS” (ONS is one night stand)

“Well I think your gorgeous & would love to see you. I know I wish I wasn’t leaving. Would love you to be my submissive” OMG, because that’s how you get a submissive… Fucking hell people are really uneducated about kink.

“Well, as you would know if you’re actually into BDSM. It takes time to build a D/s relationship. That which you don’t have. Enjoy your last few days here” Then I hit delete..

Seriously, I don’t even understand how these men even get matches! The scary thing about them is though, they’ll probably be married before me!

So that is my first mixed bag! Who was your favourite? Hahaha.

#IBD4U

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2 thoughts on “Mixed Bag – Arrogant, Chatterbox, Drunk & UK”

  1. Pingback: Noodle #21

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